Man Alive

Do you find it challenging to ask for what you want? For many men it’s vulnerable to put your needs and desires out there. Cultural norms can make it seem weak or unmanly. Today’s Man Alive guest, Marcia Baczynski, and I believe there’s nothing further from the truth! This week is a candid conversation in support of men asking for and getting what they want!

https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/manalive/AskForWhatYouWantInAWayYoureMoreLikelyToGetIt.mp3

Show notes:

Asking for what you want can range from slightly uncomfortable to terrifying!

Whether it’s asking for help with a task around the house, support at work, more affection or to try a new sexual position… You can ask for any of it in a way that brings people closer to you or pushes them away!

In today’s Man Alive Podcast episode my colleague and dear friend Marcia Baczynski and I talk about the way to ask for what you want so you’re more likely to get it! Marcia is an internationally-recognized speaker, writer, coach and expert on sexual communication, relationships and empowerment. Her primary mission is to help people overcome shame and get in touch with what they truly want – romantically, sexually and relationally – even if it’s off the beaten path.

In this conversation we cover:

* The most common way people ask for what they want that causes them NOT to get it

* Four ways to ask for what you want so you’re more likely to get it!

* The key to having conversations about your sexual desires that makes others less likely to freak out

* How to know what you actually want, especially if you tend to defer to others’ desires

* An awesome way to regain a childlike sense of aliveness and joy along with adult satisfaction

When you’re done with this one check out another awesome episode on how to create better relationships with your conversations: To Say or Not to Say: Communication to Create Closeness

With love,

Shana

Bio:

Marcia is an internationally-recognized speaker, writer, coach and expert on sexual communication, relationships and empowerment. Her primary mission is to help people overcome shame and get in touch with what they truly want – romantically, sexually and relationally – even if it’s off the beaten path.

As co-founder of Cuddle Party, Marcia has helped tens of thousands of people to speak up for the kind of touch they want, say No unapologetically, and foster more connected, affectionate relationships. In the Make Hot Play Happen weekend intensive, she co-teaches with renowned educator Midori, and helps people have more fun, lower stakes, hotter sex, more creativity and better connection in bed.

Marcia is a sought-after presenter and coach and has made over 100 magazines, newspapers, TV shows, books and radio appearances, including The Montel Williams Show, Fox News, NPR, the Washington Post, the New York Post, the San Francisco Chronicle, GQ, Marie Claire, People, Newsweek, The Daily Mail, and Penn & Teller’s Bullsh*t, to name just a few. You can find her online at www.AskingForWhatYouWant.com.

When she’s not scheming ways to make the world a better place through improving intimate relationships, Marcia enjoys finding creative ways to use her frequent-flier miles, reading historical marker signs, dressing up, planning adventures, going sailing,

What does it take to become more successful and how can you enjoy your success? Being bound to your phone or email, missing out on your and your family’s special moments, defeats the point of having success! In today’s episode, Seth Greene and I discuss how to have more success while also getting to participate in your life!

https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/manalive/149_Seth_Greene_.mp3

Show notes

Do you want more success? 

If so, do you know what success looks like for you, in terms of business and life goals?

Clarity is important, though many people who reach financial or business success find that the satisfaction they’d hoped for isn’t where they thought it would be. There are other things that come into play beyond money and status.

Some of it is external — the freedom to do what you want and when, having connected relationships and community…Much of it is internal — a sense of meaning, fulfillment and making a difference in the world.

In today’s Man Alive Podcast conversation I talked about how to have MORE SUCCESS with Seth Greene, author of eight best selling books and founder of Market Domination, one of the fastest growing direct response marketing firms in the country. We discussed…

* The fallacy of balance and what takes its place to allow for more success* The importance of creating systems and a future growth mindset  * How to stop taking calls and emails so you have time for your love life and family* How to use your own problems as fodder for your success * What makes it possible to take more and bigger risks 

Seth has worked hard and brings wisdom and life experience to the table. I highly recommend this episode for some powerful tips on both becoming more successful and enjoying the success you have!

Links:

Market Domination LLC

Curious what you’d need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn’t have to be a nightmare for women

Bio:

Seth Greene is a Nationally Recognized Direct Response Marketing Expert. Seth Greene is the author of eight best-selling marketing books, and his book Market Domination for Podcasting hit Barnes & Noble in January 2017. He is the only person in history that Dan Kennedy has nominated for marketer of the year three years in a row. 

Seth has been featured on real media like CBS MoneyWatch, CBS news, Inc magazine, The LA Times, The Boston Globe, The Miami Herald, and the #1 morning radio show in New York City. 

Seth has shared the stage with Steve Forbes, John Mackey of Whole Foods, Dan Kennedy, Jeff Mask (Infusionsoft),  and many other luminaries. Seth has been written about in three best-selling business books, the top industry trade journals, and in Dan Kennedy’s NO BS Newsletter. Mike Koenigs put him in his launch videos as one of his all-stars. He represents everyone from local brick and mortar businesses to Fortune 500 companies. Seth is the founder of one of the fastest growing direct response marketing firms in the country, Market Domination LLC. 

Many people feel unsettled when someone is upset or disappointed with you. But what if, instead of becoming defensive or retreating, you knew how to skillfully turn conflict into powerful connections and collaborations? This podcast gives you powerful and practical tools to strengthen your most important relationships.

https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/manalive/Jason.mp3

Show notes

I imagine there have been a few times in your life when you’ve gotten defensive…

When you’ve felt the need to prove yourself or justify your actions and then said or did something that wasn’t as mature as it could have been?

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\nMost people start relationships without knowing how to keep them alive over time. With romantic and business partnerships, tension and frustrations often build, causing trust and connection to fade. Did you know there are structures for forming relationships, and practices for continual “relationship hygiene,” that make them less likely to fall apart? Today’s guest and I discuss this! 
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\nI remember being young and watching my parents fight about taking out the garbage. 
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\nMy mom would pull the drawstring on the top of the bag closed, steaming with anger about the fact that my dad hadn’t done it himself. She was pissed that she had to remind him, AGAIN! 
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\nMy dad would make light of her frustration and then share his own strategy for getting it done on his own timeline and complain that she was nagging him. 
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\nI wanted to yell “Stop it! You guys are not fighting about the garbage! You’re fighting about the resentments that have built up from being misunderstood, unheard and unsupported!” (I tried to say this a few times but it didn’t go over well.)
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\nTheir 50th wedding anniversary just passed and sadly I saw that important conversations, about how they don’t feel loved or connected, still haven’t happened. 
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\nThis doesn’t have to happen to you! 
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\nWhether you’re single, or a few years or decades into a relationship, it’s important to keep it vital and healthy. Think of keeping your teeth healthy. You don’t just brush them once and then leave them to rot! You brush them a couple times a day, to ensure you get rid of the build up! 
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\nIt amazes me that relationships are similar, but most of us were not taught relational hygiene practices. 
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\nToday’s Man Alive Podcast is with a dear friend and colleague, Michael Porcelli. We have facilitated Authentic Relating Courses together for many years and have been practicing relational hygiene together for more than a decade. Michael is a consultant, coach, educator, writer, speaker, group facilitator and founding member with Bedock Culture and Leadership. He is someone who has a strong sense of relationship clarity and integrity. 
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\n* Foundational communication tools many people never learn (that sadly results in 50+% divorce rate!)* What it’s like to have relationship agreements that allow for both partners’ values and desires to be experienced* How to start challenging conversations in a way you’re more likely to be understood and stay connected* Tips for clearing the air when a relationship feels strained or dull * An upgrade to apologies that does a better job of repairing and strengthening a relationship 
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\nAfter listening to this podcast check out one of my solo episodes —\xa0How to Show Emotions Without Seeming Weak. It’s important to me that you know how that sharing your truth, fears and whatever is vulnerable to you does not make you less manly or powerful!\xa0
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\n\n\t\tShana James: Coach, Speaker, Author\n\t\t\n\t\t1\n\t\t46:58\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\t#146: This Podcast Will Make You Dangerous (In a Good Way) – Tripp Lanier\n\t\thttps://shanajamescoaching.com/peak-performance/\n\t\tThu, 16 Jul 2020 18:01:47 +0000\n\t\thttps://shanajamescoaching.com/?p=6099\n\t\thttps://shanajamescoaching.com/peak-performance/#comments\n\t\thttps://shanajamescoaching.com/peak-performance/feed/\n\t\t1\n\t\t\n
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\nBeing a man who has a powerful impact on the world while also feeling alive, free and at peace is no small task. Many men give up their fulfillment as they climb the corporate ladder and become more successful. But on today’s podcast Tripp Lanier, author of the book This Book Will Make You Dangerous, proves that you don’t have to give up your well-being, vitality, joy or anything else for success! 
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\nhttps://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/manalive/Trip-Lanier.mp3
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\nHow would you show up in the world if you didn’t need to appear good, strong, smart, legit or unique?
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\nWhat would happen if you stopped worrying about what others thought of you and instead focused on what matters to and excites you?
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\nI’ve spent much of my life being afraid people would see me as weird. I’ve finally owned that I actually am weird to many people and this is incredibly freeing! 
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\nOne of my clients has a similar fear, but his word for himself is “whacko.”
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\nAs my client and I talked this week, he found that as he started to shed this fear over the past week he felt clear minded, sovereign and present. He said he was more effective at work and with his kids. He was enjoying sex more too!
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\nIt’s common for many people to fear that\xa0something about us will make us unlovable or unwanted.\xa0On today’s Man Alive podcast we talk about how to become alive, peaceful and free by “getting your attention off yourself!”
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\nCoach and author Tripp Lanier coaches men to get out of the rat race, become an authority in their field, and make a great living doing meaningful work they love. He wrote the book:\xa0This Book Will Make You Dangerous: The Irreverent Guide For Men Who Refuse to Settle.
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\nTripp is bold, wise and very funny. He has helped remind me what is possible in life! In this conversation we discussed:
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\n* How to be dangerous in a (good) way that enlivens your relationships, career and life* The shift in goal setting that allows you to actually feel accomplished when you reach your goals * The prey vs. hunter mentality * 3 ways people waste the most energy and vitality* The power and freedom that comes with letting go of the hope to be admired, recognized or appreciated
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\nAfter you listen, get the book and read it! It’s awesome. Tripp’s style is relatable and will make you laugh out loud as you find yourself clearer than ever about how powerful you are and the potential you have!
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\nTripp Lanier
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\nGet the Book!
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\nCurious what you’d need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz
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\nFor Women: Modern dating doesn’t have to be a nightmare for women
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Being a man who has a powerful impact on the world while also feeling alive, free and at peace is no small task. Many men give up their fulfillment as they climb the corporate ladder and become more successful. But on today’s podcast Tripp Lanier, author of the book This Book Will Make You Dangerous, proves that you don’t have to give up your well-being, vitality, joy or anything else for success! 

https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/manalive/Trip-Lanier.mp3

Show notes

How would you show up in the world if you didn’t need to appear good, strong, smart, legit or unique?

What would happen if you stopped worrying about what others thought of you and instead focused on what matters to and excites you?

I’ve spent much of my life being afraid people would see me as weird. I’ve finally owned that I actually am weird to many people and this is incredibly freeing! 

One of my clients has a similar fear, but his word for himself is “whacko.”

As my client and I talked this week, he found that as he started to shed this fear over the past week he felt clear minded, sovereign and present. He said he was more effective at work and with his kids. He was enjoying sex more too!

It’s common for many people to fear that something about us will make us unlovable or unwanted. On today’s Man Alive podcast we talk about how to become alive, peaceful and free by “getting your attention off yourself!”

Coach and author Tripp Lanier coaches men to get out of the rat race, become an authority in their field, and make a great living doing meaningful work they love. He wrote the book: This Book Will Make You Dangerous: The Irreverent Guide For Men Who Refuse to Settle.

Tripp is bold, wise and very funny. He has helped remind me what is possible in life! In this conversation we discussed:

* How to be dangerous in a (good) way that enlivens your relationships, career and life* The shift in goal setting that allows you to actually feel accomplished when you reach your goals * The prey vs. hunter mentality * 3 ways people waste the most energy and vitality* The power and freedom that comes with letting go of the hope to be admired, recognized or appreciated

After you listen, get the book and read it! It’s awesome. Tripp’s style is relatable and will make you laugh out loud as you find yourself clearer than ever about how powerful you are and the potential you have!

Links:

Tripp Lanier

Get the Book!

Curious what you’d need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn’t have to be a nightmare for women

Bio: