On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Melinda Gates: Why Your Perfectionism Has Been Draining You & 7 Reasons You Should Spend Time Alone in Silence Today


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Are you a perfectionist? 

Do you ever spend time alone in silence? 

Today, Jay sits down with Melinda French Gates, co-chair of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and founder of Pivotal Ventures to talk about her journey from studying computer science at Duke University to working at Microsoft, and eventually transitioning into philanthropy.

Melinda highlights the importance of goal setting and quiet reflection, practices instilled in her from a young age; the challenges women and people of color face in achieving equality, emphasizing the need for more inclusive policies and support systems; and the importance of diverse representation in leadership and decision-making roles.

Melinda shared insights into her parenting approach, emphasizing the importance of instilling values of kindness, responsibility, and giving back to society. She also shared her journey of grappling with the decision to publicly support contraceptive access, which conflicted with her Catholic faith. This decision involved deep reflection, discussions with family and friends, and a significant amount of time spent questioning and reconciling her beliefs. 

Later in the conversation, Melinda highlighted several key lessons she learned later in life, such as the realization that the world is not equally accessible to everyone, particularly women and people of color. This understanding fueled her advocacy for creating more inclusive environments and breaking down barriers that prevent these groups from reaching their full potential​. 

In this interview, you'll learn:

How to embrace change positively

How to spend time alone 

How to set and achieve goals

How to overcome imposter syndrome

How to teach children the value of service

How to build a culture of giving

How to foster kindness and gratitude

Take a moment to reflect, give yourself grace, and celebrate your authentic self. Let’s grow together, one imperfect step at a time.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

02:58 Takeaways From Dealing with Change

04:26 Positive Mindset on Change

06:54 Where Did Your Dream Start?

10:18 Spending Time in Silence

12:11 Cultivate Relationships with Trusted People

14:12 Lessons Learned as a Parent

16:05 Not Everyone is Given the Same Opportunity

18:20 Equality for All in the Community

20:24 The Demand of Contraceptives Worldwide

24:41 The Imposter Syndrome

27:20 The Beauty in the Imperfections

30:01 Spiritual Group of Different Religions

33:36 Wisdom from Different Age Group

34:59 Addiction to Perfection

37:05 Stop Judging Yourself and Others

40:56 Equating Grace to Guilt

42:53 Finding Grace After Divorce

46:48 Be Kind to Yourself While Processing Pain

48:36 You Will Find Happiness Again

51:13 Empowering Women and People of Color

54:12 Breaking Down Biased Excuses

59:29 Kindness, Talent, and Luck

01:00:54 Children of Famous Parents

01:04:24 Creating a Culture of Giving

01:12:45 Melinda on Final Five  

Episode Resources:

Melinda French Gates | Instagram

Melinda French Gates | Facebook

Melinda French Gates | TikTok

Melinda French Gates | LinkedIn

Melinda French Gates | X

Melinda French Gates | YouTube

The Moment of Lift: How Empowering Women Changes the World 

Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation

Special thank you to Kajabi. Visit: https://kajabi.com/JayShetty

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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