Heart of Man

Pat Divilly: A Man's Guide To Shadow Work, Self-Sabotage & Facing The Inner Critic | EP 41


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  • Pat Divilly is a teacher, wellness coach, podcast host, breathwork facilitator, and the author of the national best-selling book Fit Mind. With over 15 years of experience in the wellness industry, Pat’s journey began in the physical fitness space before evolving into a deep exploration of mental, emotional, and relational wellness.

    Driven by a passion for growth, healing, and connection, his mission is to create a more authentic and connected world—one where we all live with compassion, playfulness, and curiosity.

    Today, Pat leads transformative programs for men’s health, offers corporate wellness workshops, and runs a six-month Breathwork Facilitator Training called Journey – The Breath. He also provides coaching, breathwork, and body-based therapies to help clients heal through past trauma, develop confidence, and reconnect with their authentic selves.

    As a speaker, author, and podcaster, Pat shares his insights and knowledge in digestible ways to make wellness resources accessible to anyone on a path of self-discovery and healing.

    At the core of Pat’s work, as I see it, is the belief that it’s our privilege to embrace all parts of ourselves—both our light and our shadow. In today’s conversation, we’ll dive into one of the most essential aspects of his work: the shadow, in anticipation of the release of his upcoming book „Shadow Work“.

    In my own journey, I first encountered the concept of the shadow several years ago, a term popularized in Western culture by the renowned psychotherapist Carl Jung – and in our conversation today, Pat and I explore the origins of the shadow, how it’s formed, and how we can bring awareness to it.

    We discuss:

    • The unconscious behaviors and protective strategies we may be playing out, how to work with them, and how this awareness can transform how we relate to ourselves and others.


    • How the shadow shows up in romantic relationships


    • Common emotions we often push into the shadow, such as shame, grief, and anger.


    • We tackle the ever-present inner critic, which is so common for many men, and discuss how we can relate to it in a healthier way to live more freely and authentically.

    At the heart of this episode is the importance of shining light on the aspects of ourselves that are hidden and may be unconsciously dictating our lives—bringing them into awareness, and learning to be in right relationship with them.

    As I see it, this conversation serves as a masterclass on the shadow—understanding what it is, how we encounter it, and how we can integrate those disowned aspects of ourselves into our daily lives.

    This is a conversation you won’t want to miss, and it’s been an absolute pleasure for me to co-create with my new friend, Pat...



    Connect with Pat Divilly

    Website: https://www.patdivilly.com/

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/patdivilly

    Read Pat's Book "Fit Mind: 8 Weeks to Change Your Inner Soundtrack and Tune into Your Greatness": https://www.amazon.com/Fit-Mind-Change-Soundtrack-Greatness-ebook/dp/B09NFCM6BW?ref_=ast_author_dp

    Pre-order Pat's upcoming Book "Shadow Work: A Practical Guide to Embracing your Shadow Side, Tackling Shame and Transforming Pain into Power: https://www.easons.com/shadow-work-pat-divilly-9781804581889?srsltid=AfmBOormQXHdyd4B31H3RnkQpYhIUJf197PmckeOViXSmU2-SWIWueiM&fbclid=PAY2xjawIWONFleHRuA2FlbQIxMAABpmTso9NEREyKF6j7LaX-OhGK2LsZHQnAw200GQzmc6dJ26rQW0-u9ME2KA_aem_hhbTp1_xARsLKz1fITOyHQ



    Connect with Alex Lehmann:

    Website: https://www.alexlehmann.co/

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alexlehmann_

    Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@HeartofManPodcast/featured

    Listen to this conversation on Apple Podcasts and leave a review: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/heart-of-man/id1697289478

    Email: [email protected]

    Interested in working with me 1:1? Apply here and book a free discovery call with me (two spots available at present time): https://www.alexlehmann.co/11-coaching

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    Heart of ManBy Alex Lehmann

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