“Most married Christians cannot answer the question, ‘What does God say a good sex life is supposed to look like?’”

This statement is made by our special guest, Dr. Juli Slattery. Juli is an author, speaker, and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, a ministry dedicated to reclaiming God’s design for sexuality. 

In our conversation we discuss how Juli answers this question about a good sex life from her latest book: God, Sex, and Your Marriage. 

We first cover why there is a disconnect between God and sex, even in the church. Then we unpack the four pillars of a great sex life: 

1. Faithfulness
2. Intimate Knowing
3. Sacrificial Love
4. Passionate Celebration

To learn more about Juli and her ministry and resources, visit AuthenticIntimacy.com.

More Resources:

• Java with Juli podcast
• 40 Days to Oneness devotional
• Made for Purity online course

Related Podcasts:

• The EPIC Challenge for a Great Marriage
• What are Your Sexpectations?
• What is Intimacy?

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Is all fighting in marriage bad? Don’t most of us hate conflict and try to avoid it at all costs? What if, however, there is good to be found in conflict and disagreement?

In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to unpack the positive dynamics of fighting in marriage. Discover what anger often means, how conflict is revealing what your spouse truly wants, and how to develop gratitude for the passion of differences.

For helpful resources, visit Bebroken.org.

More Resources:

• 40 Days to Oneness by Stephen Cervantes
• Not All Stress is Bad
• Marriage Restored

Related Podcasts:

• Finding Rest for Your Marriage
• 4 Skills to Transform Your Marriage
• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal

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Originally Aired on February 22, 2022

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In this episode, Stephen and I unpack what we are calling the 3 Levels of Sobriety, especially focusing on the third level. These categories are broken down into 1) real people, 2) media, and 3) thoughts. If that doesn’t quite make sense to you, that’s exactly why you need to listen to this episode.

If you are a man who wants to grow in integrity by digging deep into what goes on between your ears, listen closely because true sobriety goes beyond just eliminating unhealthy behaviors. You must work on your thoughts and this episode will help you with practical ideas for thought sobriety.

A resource that will help you retrain your mind toward a life of sexual integrity is our 40 Days of Purity online course. Learn more and enroll at 40days.PureLifeAcademy.org.

More Resources:

• Grace-Based Recovery by Jonathan Daugherty
• Unwanted by Jay Stringer
• Gateway to Freedom 3-day workshop for men

Related Podcasts:

• Addicted Thinking vs. Healthy Thinking
• Replacing Escaping and Hiding with Healthy Thoughts & Behaviors
• Guy Thoughts on Emotional Awareness and Maturity

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Originally Aired on March 8, 2022

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LAST WEEK to make your generous year-end donation at Bebroken.org/give. Thank you for your partnership!

Today’s guest is Matt Cline, the Director of Restored Ministries in Edmonton, Alberta. He is a speaker and coach who considers it an honor to tackle the epidemic of pornography and help individuals and marriages be restored from the destruction caused by sexual sin and shame. 

In this episode, Matt shares some of his story and key principles and insights that are proven to lead people from brokenness to wholeness. Our conversation addresses taking a serious view of sin, combating shame, understanding your true identity, and reclaiming a godly perspective on the body.

Learn more about Matt and his ministry’s resources at RestoredMinistries.ca.

More Resources:

• Help for Men: Men.Bebroken.com
• Help for Women: Women.Bebroken.com
• Help for Families: Family.Bebroken.com

Related Podcasts & Media:

• Recovery Discovery: Identity
• Recovery Discovery: No More Shame
• How Identity Shapes Everything

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Make your generous year-end donation today at Bebroken.org/give!

How does brokenness fit with wholeness in Christ? Are these contradictory or might they be explained as a paradox that actually unlocks the door to experiencing God’s grace and transformative work in our lives?

On today’s episode, I’m flying solo to help unpack this amazing paradox between brokenness and wholeness. I will share three “types” of brokenness and three contexts for wholeness and how this all fits together on our journey of transformation in Christ. 

You may download my outline for today’s episode at Bebroken.org/paradox.

More Resources:

• Our Bodies Tell God's Story by Christopher West
• Humility by Andrew Murray
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups

Related Podcasts:

• The Immanuel Approach in Recovery
• The 7 (or More) Pillars of Emotional Growth
• What Can We Learn from Lust?

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Pastors are not immune to sexual temptations and sexual strongholds. But many pastors feel isolated and “trapped” from reaching out for help with their private sexual struggles. 

On today’s episode, we have Mark Denison join us to share with us some key principles from his new book, Broken Vessels, on how pastors can get help to break free from sexual strongholds and even still be used by God for kingdom work. 

To learn more about Mark and his ministry, visit TheresStillHope.org.

More Resources:

• Broken Vessels: Restoring Broken Pastors for Kingdom Use
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Recovery Minute

Related Podcasts:

• A Hopeful Response to Church Leaders Struggling with Sexual Sin
• Pastors on Porn
• Reframing How the Church Views Sexual Purity

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Today’s guests are Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith. They are the directors of The Raabsmith Team, coaches and therapists that love to help individuals, couples, and families create life-giving change in themselves and in their relationships.

In today’s episode, Matthew and Joanna will help couples understand the ins and outs of rebuilding a healthy marriage after betrayal. There is hope and thriving intimacy is possible even after betrayal. This conversation will be especially beneficial for couples who are wanting restoration. 

For more information about Matthew and Joanna and their resources, visit RaabsmithTeam.com.

More Resources:

• Intimacy Pyramid Training (virtual workshop)
• Online Care Groups for Wives
• First 7 Days programs (for men and wives)

Related Podcasts:

• Affair Recovery Through a Trauma Lens
• Rebuilding Your Marriage After Sexual Betrayal
• Hope After Betrayal

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For nearly two decades we have been inviting men to embark on an emotional growth mission, not merely a sexual purity mission (as good as that is). But what is an emotional growth mission and what are the challenges and possible stumbling blocks to emotional growth? 

In this episode, Stephen and I define the emotional growth mission and share over 10 thoughts and ideas that could stunt this mission. 

To get started, or keep going, on your emotional growth mission, watch the 7-part Emotional Training for Men webinar series at Bebroken.org/etm-webinar.

More Resources:

• 40 Days of Training for Your Soul
• Untangling Emotions by Groves and Smith
• Free Integrity Webinar for Men

Related Podcasts:

• How to Experience Excellent Emotional Connections
• Essential Truths to Heal and Mature Your Broken Emotional System
• Do Your Emotional Beliefs Lead You to Connection or Disconnection?

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Porn is not victimless. In other words, porn use has consequences that negatively impact the viewer. 

This may seem obvious, especially to those who have developed an addiction to porn. But it’s important to state the impact of porn bluntly and clearly in order to help you see it for what it really is: dangerous and harmful.

In today’s episode, Stephen and I will help you see multiple ways in which pornography impacts your life – things like escaping, avoiding relationships, unhealthy fantasy, the pain and difficulty of repairing what you have broken, and more.

For help in overcoming unwanted porn use, visit Bebroken.org.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• 40 Days of Purity Online Course
• Personal Ministry Consultation

Related Podcasts:

• Breaking Free with Russell Willingham
• Outgrowing the Porn Pacifier
• Helping Men Overcome Porn and Get Emotionally Fit

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Thousands of men over the past 20 years have reached out to our ministry to get help in overcoming unwanted sexual behaviors. Our desire is to help them experience long-term freedom, not merely short-term abstinence. So, what are the keys to long-term freedom from unwanted behaviors?

Our guest is Jason Martinkus. He is the founder and president of Redemptive Living, a coaching and speaking ministry helping men find freedom from sexual integrity issues and marriages find redemption beyond betrayal. Jason has 19 years of personal sexual sobriety; he has walked the walk.

In this episode we talk about key principles of freedom from unwanted sexual behaviors, such as humility, confession, authentic community, and more – principles that are vital for both short-term and long-term freedom. 

To learn more about Jason and his ministry, visit RedemptiveLiving.com.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Integrity Webinar for Men
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups

Related Podcasts:

• The Freedom Fight with Ted Shimer
• Recovery Discovery 030: Lifelong Learning
• The Last Relapse with Sathiya Sam

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