Redefining Strength Podcast

I think something we too often like to gloss over is the sacrifices and challenges involved in achieving results.

Getting a new and better result, making a change is NOT easy.

Even something that eventually feels sustainable can be hard to start because it isn’t instinctual. It isn’t what we’ve always done.

So when I work with a client I like to discuss the options in how we move forward.

While I don’t believe in fad diets or quick fixes, I do believe we have a choice in the speed of our results…

And how fast we choose to move forward toward a goal is dependent on how much we are willing to go all in, embrace change and make sacrifices.

Often when we start a new program, we tell ourselves it's going to be THE THING. The lifestyle change we've been looking for.

We tell ourselves it's going to be easy and magical (ok maybe not the magical part).

Heck maybe we've even been convinced of this by friends who claim it was soooo easy to do and the BEST thing they've ever done.

We can even manage to convince ourselves there won't be struggles.

But this is exactly the OPPOSITE of what we should be doing.

It's honestly what often sets us up for failure.

Because if we think or believe that a change should be easy? We'll only end up super frustrated and overwhelmed when it isn't.

Which 98% of the time...IT ISN'T!

Something almost always comes up.

And when it does, if we've told ourselves things SHOULD be easy?

We'll feel like there is something wrong with us because it isn't, especially if we've been told it was easy for someone else.

We have to realize instead that there will ALWAYS be set backs and hiccups and mistakes.

And that often when someone is LOOKING BACK and saying it was easy, even they encountered struggles when first starting out.

So instead of trying to convince yourself that the process will be easy, OVERSELL THE NEGATIVE.

Honestly the more we want overnight results, the less likely we are to truly see the results we want and deserve.

Fad diet results often not only aren’t real results, but they aren’t lasting results because we haven’t truly created sustainable habit changes.

So as much as I know we all want results yesterday, we have to get ready to make some true lifestyle changes if we want to see the amazing results we deserve.

That’s why I wanted to share 6 things that often hold us back from truly reaching our goals…

Yup you heard that right. We make things impossible because we tell ourselves they aren’t possible.

And guess what?

Sure…everything isn’t possible…nor we will achieve that goal in the same way someone else has even if we get there.

Getting abs for you may be different than for me.

We of course all have genetic limitations and pre-dispositions.

But to just say you can’t get abs…well why not still strive for YOUR version of your leanest physique?

Why just say you can’t have that exact thing and give up?

Seriously then what is the option?!

So often if we believe we can’t have something we just don’t even try!

But we’ve got to stop telling ourselves we can’t if we want to move forward.

Life is about constantly growing and improving. That is the fun in it.

And I do truly believe that too often we write ourselves off.

I didn’t think I could get abs!

I didn’t think I could deadlift 310 pounds.

I didn’t think I could get a tennis scholarship to a Division I team and play.

I didn’t think I could start a business and go out on my own.

Heck I didn’t think I could be that person in front of the camera!

But I also didn’t not try.

There will always be a DOUBT that you can’t do something, but while I didn’t necessarily know it was possible until it was, I believed in the opportunity.

I believed that there was no point not to try.

And I think that’s the key, realizing the alternative.

Which the alternative is to just give up, never move forward, never improve.

Is that really what we want?

Any time I’m presented with these situations I like to reflect on what I do, what I’ve seen successful clients do, to share tips…and here are 3 mindset shifts I think are key to putting ourselves out there and seeing what is possible.

Body acceptance…Loving your body…

I’m going to be brutally honest, I don’t think we’ll ever be 100% happy with ourselves or content.

 I think it is the human condition to always want more.

 BUT I also think we need to find a balance where we appreciate who and what we are flaws and all.

We need to love ourselves despite the struggles and even value ourselves potentially more because of what we’ve gone through.

Struggles do not diminish our value.

Personally I believe those life experiences enhance our worth.

But I thought this was also an interesting way of thinking about value…

If I offered you a crisp and new $20 bill right now, you’d want it.

If I crumpled that, you’d still want.

If I rubbed some dirt on it and stepped on it, you’d still want the $20.

Because the value of that bill hasn’t changed despite the dirt.

Honestly the wear and tear on the bill really doesn’t matter, it’s still $20.

We’ve got to value ourselves in the same way - we need to value ourselves despite painful conditions and failures.

We can’t degrade ourselves just because of temporary setbacks and struggles.
 We need to realize all the worth we truly have.

I think when we can see our value and realize it is unchanging despite our current circumstance we can start to better achieve acceptance.

We can work to improve without being unhappy.

So how can you help yourself see your own worth?

I got an email saying “What about the stubborn belly fat? Yeah I know macros, but what else can I do?”

My reply - “Why add complication to something that should be simple?”

Too often we want to do more. We want to do things that maybe make that 1% difference over staying focused on the thing we just simply need to do consistently.

Because it makes us feel more in control…or often we even hope we can AVOID doing the hard but key thing to get results.

I know this is not “sexy.”

But truly results are built off of those boring basics.

It’s not the supplements. The fancy equipment. The crazy moves that make the difference.

It boils down to clear workout progressions repeated weekly with a focused goal for their design and macros.

Yup macros. No matter your goals.

If you use those two fundamental things and seek to always learn and track (what I believe is self-empowerment), you will be able to adjust your lifestyle as your needs and goals change - whether those changes are due to shifting priorities, simply something new you’d like to work toward or changes with age and hormones.

Now I get that neither of these things are the fast fixes and that they take learning and consistency when we sometimes want something shiny and new, but they are key.

Why Macros Matter…

Macros are what every diet dials in even if it doesn’t tell you that. Some diets may tell you to avoid specific foods or food groups. But this is to eliminate or reduce a macro.

The issue with this is…What if you plan to include this food long term?

You don’t know the balance.

Not to mention the second we restrict something, the more we want to rebel even if we didn’t eat that food often.

And so often in this restriction of specific foods, we don’t account for changes in our lifestyle. It’s why something may work for a bit only to not work later. It leads often to frustration when we’re doing all of the “right things.”

It’s why you need to seek to really understand the foods you’re consuming and how they impact you.

That way, if you start training more, you can adjust your fueling to match.

If you find you have cravings around your period, you can actually steer into the skid and adjust because your metabolic rate has changed.

If you are busy at work and training less, you can adjust your macros.

Want to build muscle, you can adjust.

You are in control AND you don’t have to restrict anything specifically.

You can find YOUR balance.

Why Progressions Matter…

Too often we see training as calories burned. Working harder over working smarter.

But this is often why we end up like that hamster on the wheel, running really fast to not get anywhere.

Like everything in life, we have to have a clear destination and map out a course to get there.

You don’t just get in your car and drive to a location you’ve never been. You map out the route so you can track your progress toward your destination and be able to correct any wrong turns.

Same thing goes for your workouts.

You need to map out a weekly schedule based on YOUR schedule, needs and goals, and then track your progress toward it.

I know people want to claim it is boring, but this is an excuse not to dial things in more and be intentional.

You don’t have to repeat the same workouts forever. But giving yourself time to truly maximize and build is key. Even 3-4 weeks is enough.

And then you can change things up a bit, even progressing moves through the same but different. This helps you truly create the progression you need to build back stronger. And it helps you avoid overtraining and wasting a ton of time and effort.

More is not better. And more is often why we don’t see progress and end up standing still.

Raise your hand as high as you can.

Go ahead...do it right now.

Now raise your hand higher....

You did didn't you?

Funny how I told you to raise your hand as high as you can and yet you could still raise it higher when I said to....

Funny how it didn't take really much more effort to raise it a bit higher either....

Why do I mention all of this?

Because A. Often we don't realize we can give more until we are asked to.

And B. So often we don't necessarily do everything we can even though those little tweaks, doing just a little bit more, doesn't take much more effort.

It isn't that we are lazy either. Or that we don't care or want to give our all.

We do. 

But I think sometimes we just don't realize how much we are truly capable of. We don't realize the little bit more we can get out of things with just a very small bit of extra effort.

Sometimes we need that extra outside push.

That outside perspective.

We need to be shown that our limiting beliefs are false and that more is possible.

Heck sometimes we just even need someone making us aware that this could be happening like I have done right now asking you to raise your hand.

But how can you do this on a continual basis?

How can you not let yourself “get away with things” and be held back by your first impression of your attempt at something?

I wanted to share 3 ways to reflect on your effort and always get a little bit more out of yourself…

You end up pleasing no one. Especially not yourself.

I personally believe we will ALWAYS care about what other people think…it’s how we can actually function as a society.

But we also have to learn to filter what we care about.

We have to learn to recognize when someone gives us an opinion that isn’t in line with what we need or want.

And then we have to be ok with them judging us because we don’t go along with what they believe.

But we have to remember we are doing this to be true to ourselves.

Because whether we make ourselves happy is really what matters long term. You are stuck with yourself. You have to be the one that ultimately lives with your decisions.

I mention this because often when we make lifestyle changes, make sacrifices others don’t understand, we will meet resistance and judgement.

And it can feel awkward.

It can feel awkward to skip the chips or bread. To not have the drink. To pick something “healthy” off the menu.

And while I firmly believe we need to strike a lifestyle balance right for us, at times that does mean NOT eating things that we may have in the past.

And that can bring with it judgement from friends and family.

These judgements so often derail us from reaching our goals.

But I want to discuss how to take ownership and stick to what truly matters most to us.

I want to discuss how to make sure you’re focused on doing what makes YOU happy over just trying to appease someone else….

Often we DEFEND previous dieting and exercise practices as having “worked” for us because we did see potentially an immediate result from them.

Yet often as we are defending these old ways of doing things, we’re fighting against something new we’ve sought out because we no longer have the result we wanted.

Aka the habits or routines weren’t sustainable.

So the question that always comes to mind for me is…
 Did it really work?

My answer?

No.