Same Team with The Freemans

If you are like Aaron and had a loving upbringing with lots of support from your parents, that means you would be better set up for a strong relationship rather than if you were like Jocelyn and had your parents go through a divorce or tough upbringing right? NOPE! Did you ever think that whatever your past upbringing, it could be what is causing any hiccups in your current relationship?

In this episode will hear each of our stories about how we grew up and how Aaron was limited in being able to express and feel love by not seeing examples of emotion and how to handle any conflicts growing up. While Jocelyn's story is one about feeling she had to be the rescuer and felt there needed to be drama to feel that her partner cared about her.

Whatever your past upbringing, you are not just interacting with who your partner is right now today, but you are being influenced by your own past examples that are most likely not in the best service of your relationship. This episode is about you bringing awareness into just what that unconscious behavior and impact might be.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

Get $40 OFF Early Bird tickets for the LIVE Couples Workshop on Oct 10th, 2020 (only lasts until Sept 11th, 2020 - our anniversary!) Use code: "podcast40" at checkout.

Pre-order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts.

You can't get 'down' enough or have a bad enough attitude to positively influence your partner. You just can't; and we prove it to you today! This episode will light a fire in YOU, and shift a destructive belief you might have about how to truly influence your partner to change.

Sure, you could get your partner to be "compliant" because of your bad attitude and they just want to succumb to make you happy or get you off their back. But that's not a recipe for lasting love and connection. Instead, you're going to hear a powerful, counterintuitive approach to motivating and positively influencing your partner to shift their attitude or behavior.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources for you:

1. Pre-order The Argument Hangover and get $200 of bonus gifts, including a conflict resolution course
2. Looking for immediate and personal guidance? Schedule a Relationship Breakthrough Session
3. Follow us on Instagram

This is one of the truest quotes we've ever heard: "There isn't anything that anyone wants for any other reason than they believe that they will feel better in the having of it." So everything you do in life is all for this one reason-- to feel better!

The problem is that this puts your experience of life based on things you don't have 100% control over. It gets even worse for your relationship if you rely on your partner's mood, energy, or actions to make you feel good. This puts pressure, stress, and overwhelm on your partner as well as you in a passive and reactive state within your relationship. Nothing good comes from that!

In this episode you get the proactive and active (in the moment) ways to take control of your emotional and mental health. This way you don't rely on your partner but be able to positively influence each other and support the health of your relationship!

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

Pre-order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts. The NOW available free mini course will

• Transform your conflicts
• Give you power over emotional triggers
• Set you up to fight smarter
• Allow you to repair from conflicts faster

Listening is not a passive action! Listening is actually an intentional action. You might not recognize the difference between when you're listening from your EGO vs your HEART.

In this podcast, we're going to break down the difference- how it sounds, how it feels to you, and how it feels to your partner.

None of us were really taught how to LISTEN, which can leave your partner not feeling truly understood. Sure, you might have HEARD them, but did you TRULY listen. You'll find out how to know.

This episode is critical for all couples to listen to and will help you connect at deeper, more profound levels than you've ever imagined.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

Pre-order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts.

To learn more about the last 2 spots for the group coaching journey starting soon, Upgrade Your Partnership, DM us on Instagram.

Have you ever found yourself or your partner avoiding direct or clear communication, evading problems, fearing intimacy or competition, making excuses, blaming, playing the victim, feigning compliance with requests, being sarcastic, or hiding anger?

All of these behaviors describe being passive aggressive! You might not have thought of this at first, but there are many couples that are experiencing this right now in their marriage.

This topic even comes from patterns we saw in our couples group, so we put up a poll, and this topic was voted on to be this week's topic.

In this episode you will take away:

• How to recognize the passive aggressive patterns
• The 3 reasons why this happens within a relationship
• 4 things that could be missing so that you do not do not have this pattern start or continue in your own marriage.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

1. Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (Home Edition) to enhance your communication skills together.
2. Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube
3. Follow us on Instagram

Do you find that you are physically together with your partner more than ever, yet still feeling disconnected? How could this be right? Well, connection isn't just about proximity. Connection also isn't something that you can just count on always being there. It takes attention and intention just like anything in life that you want to grow.

Today's topic came from multiple messages that we received within one hour. One of the questions saying: "What to do when you get disconnected? We are really intense, when we are close we are best friends. But sometimes we get into a cycle of and it's hard to get out of being disconnected. It gets bad enough that we feel like pushing the wedding away...this is not what we want, we want to be partners and make it work"

We also did the drawing for the podcast reviews and the winner is…. Betty on Instagram. So Betty please message us on IG so we can get your address to send your gift!

In this podcast episode you will take away:

• What really fuels the feeling of connection in your relationship
• What is missing when you feel disconnected
• 4 ways to grow and deepen your connection

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

We announced our newest book last Friday and the title is... THE ARGUMENT HANGOVER!

📚 Pre Order your copy of TheArgumentHangover.com now and claim these bonuses: (FREE Mini course, Debrief An Argument Workbook, and FREE event ticket for Valentines Day)📚

• Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube
• Follow us on Instagram

Trust is the feeling of: "you have my back". When trust is high in any relationship you can feel that you can fly, fail, and yet still be accepted and loved by your partner. This is so foundational for a healthy, happy relationship that wants to be able to grow. When trust has been broken, whether from a big or small event, it harbors doubt, resentment, and suspicion in the relationship.

Today's topic came from several DM's and IG poll votes, plus a financial trust question from Teresa: "After repeat offenses running the gamut of petty to severe in nature on occasion; how do you rebuild trust in a real way? I am between being codependent in needing to trust deeply and frustrated because I feel like I never can 100% trust because of the continued offenses and boundary crossing."

One other question was: "It was about a promise of not doing something, then doing it and lying about it to my face….multiple times. So broken promises/outright lies/secrets. How to make amends and be consistent with everything?" Thank you everyone for the questions and even Alicia from the book club, being honest about wanting to rebuild trust.

Today from this episode you'll takeaway:

• What trust really means within your relationship
• The major effects a lack of trust can have
• Why you or your partner would break a promise or even lie
• 4 ways to rebuild trust in your partner and the relationship.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Resources For Your Relationship:

1. Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (Home Edition) to enhance your communication skills together
2. Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube
3. Follow us on Instagram

So you have had a fight in your relationship, now what…? Right after you might feel angry or sad, certainty disconnected, or even that you do not want to be around them. This is a tough place to be in for your relationship; HOWEVER this is not the part you need to be worried about initially. It's about how long are you going to be in this period of being disconnected! This episode is all about how to reconnect after you have had a fight or disagreement.

Today's topic came from a question on a DM from Isha on saying: "Can you include in your podcast about how to talk after a fight? How to listen and accept each other's perspectives regarding a situation that has led to a fight?" Thank you for the question Isha as this is a topic we have gotten many questions about too.

Today from this episode you'll takeaway:

• The 3 "Don'ts" for after a big fight
• For example the action that has you sweep things under the rug
• Then the 3 things to "Do" after a fight to reconnect together.
• For example how to get to the real root cause (and not what you "think" the argument is really about)

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram

Resources For Your Relationship:

1. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.
2. Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (Home Edition) to enhance your communication skills together
3. Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube
4. Follow us on Instagram

All of a sudden the personality differences that attracted you to your partner earlier in the relationship, become the things that frustrate you and cause tension! How can this be? Once you find yourself in this place it can feel like your own needs are not getting met. For example maybe you are naturally more spontaneous and playful than your partner who 'makes decisions slower' and likes to structure and plan things out.

Today's topic came from Heather's question on Instagram that said: "My partner and I realized a key difference in the way we both operate. I have a need for spontaneity and often throw ideas out and expect him to roll with it. He has a need, however, to think things through and plan things out well in advance. How can we both be sensitive to each other's needs while still feeling our own needs are met?"

Form today's episode you'll takeaway:

• Why this dynamic of tension happens in your relationship
• How you can bring awareness to your differences first to leverage them as a team rather than have them be things you try to change in your partner
• Two tips you can implement right now to be sure both of your needs get met and you both feel balanced in your decision making together as a true team.

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram

Resources For Your Relationship:

1. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.
2. Wanna take the relationship assessment? First get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping) to join the book club!
3. Follow us on Instagram

Swinging for the fence right from the start here… criticism in your relationship in one of the top four things that lead to disconnection and divorce (*The Gottman Institute). Even besides that fact, being criticized by your partner just sucks! It leads to arguments, conflicts, and a loss of connection at best.

Though it may seem like a topic that you want to tell your partner to listen to, because this is something that THEY need to work on, there are key things that you BOTH can work on to better receive feedback, give feedback, and the major difference between criticism. With this you will be able to use feedback in your relationship at the right time and to evolve your relationship to be even better!

This topic came up from the question that Aaron G submitted in the Power Couple Book Club. He asked: "how can I take criticism better? I tend to get defensive, then nothing is solved and things are weird for a few days."

From this episode you'll:

• Know the difference between criticism and feedback
• How to take feedback without getting defensive
• How to both give and receive feedback in your relationship to become stronger together

About Us:

We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram

Resources For Your Relationship:

1. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.
2. Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping)
3. Follow us on Instagram