In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) How do I make myself desire sex more? I’ve tried everything to turn myself on but nothing seems to work. I have never had a high sex drive and probably never will. But I would like to get to the point where sex is remotely appealing. Do you have any advice I won’t have already heard?

2) I know my husband watches porn—we’ve always had a laugh about it. But I was surprised to see the kind of porn he watches. I couldn’t resist checking his history—I did it on a whim—and now wish I hadn’t. There was some weird stuff on there. Is this something to worry about? I figured he just watched "normal" porn.

3) My wife of 23 years has just left me—for another woman. She’s been straight the whole of her life and we have two children. I am obviously upset, but not sure how seriously to take this. My male friends tell me to hang in there and that she will come back. She says she’s not lesbian but fell in love with a person. Is it more likely she will change her mind because it’s a woman not a man and this is not her usual thing? It’s been six months now.

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) My wife and I have had sex in our garden, but she wants to try it in semi-public. We want the thrill of thinking we might be caught, but not actually get caught. Do you have any tips on how to go about this?

2) I’m 27 and just got engaged to my girlfriend of seven years. At the start, we had sex once or twice a week, but now we barely touch each other. We have discussed this many times and agree to prioritize sex, but it never happens. Once every 1-2 months we masturbate each other but that’s it, and it’s not enough for me (though it is for her). Is this how it’s going to be when we marry? I love her, but I’m frustrated.

3) My wife had an affair six months ago. We’ve been to therapy and are doing well, but haven’t attempted to have sex yet. I feel like I can forgive her, but I’m worried images of the two of them together will haunt me when we get physical. How should we tackle this?

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I’d really like to try using a whip as a sex toy. My partner is up for it, but can you advise on what’s best to buy for a beginner and how to incorporate it into sex?

2) Our relationship is really good but my wife and I argue about sex a lot. Do sex-life problems suggest there are problems elsewhere in the relationship? It’s a perpetual problem that never seems to get solved.

3) Can you give me any advice on massaging my husband’s prostate during sex? I’d never done it before, but we're both keen to try.

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I’m intrigued to know what happens at a chem sex party. I’ve got a few adventurous girlfriends and we’re all quite keen to give it a try. Would you advise it?

2) I know it’s normal to go through periods when you don’t find your partner attractive. But when should you worry that it’s more than a passing phase?

3) I’m struggling with premature ejaculation. After 30 seconds of penetration, I struggle to hold back and constantly have to pull out. I think it’s psychological. We tried a penis sleeve, which worked at first, but we both enjoy it so much it backfired. I tried pelvic floor exercises as well, but to no avail. My wife loves the vibrator/penetration combination, but it’s such a fight for me it ruins the mood.

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I’ve just started seeing a guy who is really into giving ‘facials.’ I’ve done it before, and don’t honestly mind, but what’s the psychology behind it? Why do so many guys like doing it, and is it degrading to agree?

2) I’ve only ever had an orgasm once without a vibrator, and that was after a long sex session with me on top. I’d like to start masturbating without vibration, but I can orgasm within seconds using my bullet vibe, and it feels like it's going to take hours using my fingers. After a bit, I give in and reach for the vibrator. Any hints on how to stick with it?

3) Is it normal to have never felt sexual desire? I am a 23-year-old man and have never had a girlfriend and never masturbated. I watched porn once out of curiosity, but it didn’t make me aroused in any way. I don’t have any issue with sex and am not aware of any trauma in my childhood. I like women as friends, but just don’t have any desire to have sex with them. I’m not attracted to men, either. I’ve read about asexuality, and I’m guessing that’s me, though am wondering if there’s any research on whether this might change as I get older.

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I love my husband and I’m very attracted to him. But for some reason, I have to picture a scene from porn to reach orgasm with him. I’m very much in my head when having sex in general, and find myself thinking about a million things that aren’t related to sex during it. How can I change this pattern of having to play these images to climax? Is it something you’ve heard of before?

2) I have been seeing an amazing man for two years. He’s chivalrous, loving, we have sex often, and it’s good. But, he seems to be permanently horny and comments constantly about my bum and boobs and how much he loves my body. Then he gropes me and gets turned on. I don’t want that attention when I’m doing the washing up or reading a book or watching telly. I’ve tried laughing it off or being flattered or just moving his hands away, but when I don’t respond the way he wants, he gets moody.

After much prodding on my part, he admitted he feels rejected and hurt when I don’t react favorably to his advances. I love how attentive he is, but I feel stifled by it when I’m trying to have time by myself. How can I politely decline the attention without him feeling rejected and getting in another mood that lasts for days?

3) My daughter is 12 years old and we’ve been pretty open with her about sex, body parts, and how things work. I grew up in a house where there was zero sex talk, which resulted in lots of sexual issues I had to deal with later in my life in a therapist's office. So, I’m determined to raise my daughter without the shame I was brought up with. When she hit puberty, I mentioned masturbation to her. I told her that this is a normal thing lots of women do and enjoy, and I mentioned that there is a spot on a women’s body which feels intensely pleasurable. I told her we could talk about it more if she wanted, thinking this would probably be in a couple of years. But, a few days later she asked me to show her the spot and explain what to do to get pleasure. The question blindsided me. We were driving, so I told her we could talk about it later. She’s forgotten about it momentarily, but now I’m at a loss of what to do. I want to be honest and open, but she’s only 12! Is it too early to show/talk about that stuff? If not, what’s the best way to go about it? Any advice will be much appreciated!

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) Kelsey recently said she faked many orgasms while married. What is the general feeling about faking it now? How do most people react when they find out their partner’s faked it? Surely men think it’s a betrayal in the relationship?

2) Help! The inevitable has happened: sex with my husband of six years now feels like I’m having sex with my best friend. We’ve both been married before and vowed this wouldn’t happen to us—but it has. I know you’ve talked about this before and, conceptually, I understand why it happens. Can you skip straight to the how-to-fix-it part with some practical tips that make a difference?

3) I am a 35-year-old guy and I recently moved to Europe. I’m currently working in a restaurant as a server. Recently, I was serving a couple—a man and a woman. We had a short conversation during their meal about all the usual things. But after I brought them the bill, the man asked me outright if I would be interested in meeting his wife later and having sex with her. I know that people in Europe tend to be more open about their sex lives, and I’m aware that there are many swinger clubs. But what does this mean about their relationship? Is this kind of thing normal? What would be your thoughts on this situation, and how should I respond?

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) My wife and I communicate well about sex, but lately I’ve become extremely turned on by the thought of watching her have sex with a stranger. I think it’s called ‘hotwifing.’ It’s just a fantasy, and I’m not sure how I’d feel if we acted on it. Usually, anytime we have a ‘kink’ we tell each other, but I worry she’ll think I’m a pervert with this one!  Should I tell her or keep it bottled up? I know it’s quite common, but it’s also weird. I guess my question is: is it normal, and should I tell her or keep it to myself? I doubt she’d be game to do it anyway, and I don’t want to freak her out after 15 years together.

2) I’m a 60-year-old man who has been happily married for over 30 years. Sadly, my wife is increasingly less interested in sex. Not only has her libido plummeted, but penetrative sex is painful and non-penetrative sex just doesn’t do it for her. She doesn’t want to give up totally on sex with me, but says it is best if we just do it occasionally. Very occasionally. I struggle with this. I need more than just masturbation, and she understands that. After a lot of talking, she’s suggested we practice non-monogamy. (But just me, since she doesn’t want to have sex with anyone else). We have agreed on some rules: I can’t have sex with someone we know (I wouldn’t anyway), I can’t pay for it, and I must practice safe sex. But that’s as far as we’ve got. Please can you help us, as I don’t know what to do next. And just to clarify: we still love each other, we still want to spend the rest of our lives together, we get on really well, and I am not interested in a romantic relationship—just a ‘play partner.’

3) I loved the question asking you both what are three things you wouldn’t do in bed. Can I be cheeky and ask what three things you WOULD like to both do, but have never done!

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I’m a 24-year-old woman and have never enjoyed sex because it hurts. I’ve been checked out by my doctor and there doesn’t seem to be anything anatomically wrong, but sex is never pleasant for me. Can you help?

2) I’m a 36-year-old man and have been secretly wearing women’s panties under my clothes for years. It's nothing sinister. I just like the feel of the fabric on my skin and that I'm doing something 'naughty.' I have never told anyone about this and have never been found out. For the first time, I am now in a relationship with a woman I think might understand and even indulge me. Do you think I should chance it and tell her? We’ve been together ten months and I want to marry her.

3) Can you suggest a way to speed up sex with my husband? He lasts forever and thinks it’s something to be proud of. I find it boring and I get sore. All I think about is how to make it end. 

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I like having sex with my partner, but get so easily distracted. One minute I'm into it, the next I'm worrying about something or spend the whole session thinking, 'Don't forget to do this or that' afterwards. It interferes with my enjoyment. How do I turn off my busy brain?

2) My partner has been hassling me to have anal sex for years. I finally gave in, and it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. But it’s never going to be something I look forward to doing. Problem is, he now wants it all the time and sulks when I say no. He says it feels better because it feels tighter.

3) I’m a 46-year-old woman who has fallen in love with a 68-year-old man. My friends and family are horrified that I am considering a future with this man even though he doesn't look or act his age. I’m intelligent enough to guess the emotional issues we might confront and know that while the age difference doesn’t matter now, it will later. But what will happen sexually as time goes on? He has no erection problems now, but is there an age when men can no longer get erect? His appetite for sex is very strong but how long will that last? Is there an age when you stop desiring sex?

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.