The current estimation that a marriage in the US will end in divorce is somewhere between 43 to 45%.

Divorce is also regularly cited as the second highest life stressor for Americans, just below the death of a spouse.Given the high incidence of divorce paired with the degree of stress it can incur, it’s a good idea to know more about it.

One of the top psychology experts in the field of divorce and child custody is my colleague, Dr. Michael Kerner (https://kernerevals.com/). Mike has performed over 450 child custody evaluations, and has practiced forensic psychology since 1986. Mike is the recipient of multiple awards including California Psychological Association’s Distinguished Contribution to Psychology in 2018.

Mike has been a mentor to many colleagues and certainly to me. His wisdom and gentle way of conveying it shows up in this interview.

So, listen in, as a top child custody evaluator talks about divorce.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-single/201702/what-is-the-divorce-rate-really

https://www.dartmouth.edu/eap/library/lifechangestresstest.pdf

Imagine two students in college: one is a gay male, and the other is a straight super jock. The gay male is quiet and introverted, and the straight guy is extraverted to the point of being loud and into the old joke of throwing something at a person and shouting, “think fast!”

Can you imagine these two guys being friends? How about dear friends for 40 years?

Let's make it a little more interesting still: the straight guy would become a high achieving Navy SEAL. And he would also be the one to help his gay friend express his emotions more fully.

Will Schwalbe wrote a beautiful memoir chronicling his friendship with Chris Maxey and very intimate details of how each man supported the other. The book is called We Should NOT Be Friends and it has received acclaim from seemingly every major news outlet and was even named a New Yorker Best Book of the Year.

Those of you who know me know that I care a great deal about friendship. And this book hit a grand slam. So, I can't wait for you to hear my conversation with Will Schwalbe as we talk about friendship.

Back in the 90’s when email was still new, one of the first viral emails I received was a commencement address to a group of high school students. The person who delivered that address was Guy Kawasaki. Guy is very well known and, for those of you who don't know him, you are about to hear from a man who has done a lot with his life so far. He worked closely with Steve Jobs as one of the Apple employees originally in charge of marketing the Macintosh. He would go on to writing 16 books, work as a venture capitalist, sit on the Wikimedia Foundation board of trustees, and become the chief evangelist for Canva. He is also a husband, father, and later in life became a hockey player and a surfer. He started surfing at 60.

If you look at his Wikipedia page, you will see that it reads like the story of a renaissance man living in Silicon Valley.

Guy has been a hero of mine for some time and I finally got to meet him when I was emceeing the Palo Alto TEDx event where he was one of the speakers. Guy crushed it on stage but, as you’ll learn, he had no real way of knowing because he is deaf.

Guy is the host of the Remarkable People podcast and his newest book is called Think Remarkable. The book is outstanding with a foreword by Jane Goodall and it has received praise from many greats including Carol Dweck and Robert Cialdini.

You’ll hear all kinds of wisdom from this wise man (coincidentally, the title of his autobiography is Wise Guy and it’s one of my all-time favorite memoirs). And a key takeaway is something I believe we all want to learn: how to be remarkable.

Anyone who is a parent knows that parenting can be really hard. But, fear not, help is here! This episode unpacks a great parenting style that encourages children to be autonomous, able to relate to people well, and instills confidence by allowing the child to feel a strong, realistic sense of competence.

This type of parenting is brilliant. When I read the guest’s book, I had that nagging thought of, “I wish this book had been around before I had kids so I could have read it and we all could have benefitted!”

Turns out, it’s not too late. I still can and so can you!

As many of you know, there have been many trends in parenting over the years, some that are still seen as having positive attributes, some that we wouldn’t touch with a 10-foot pool these days. And others, which had once been popular, have been shown through research to be ill-advised.

However, the advice from this guest has over 30 years of research backing it, and my guest is none other than Dr. Emily Edlynn (https://www.emilyedlynnphd.com/). Emily has written a book called Autonomy-Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent, Confident Children. I love this book and I am not alone.  SuperPsyched guest and brilliant author Melinda Wenner Moyer said of Emily’s book, “It’s not just useful—it’s a must-read.”

Agreed 100%, Melinda!

So, listen in as Emily shares the importance of autonomy-supported parenting, and why it’s not too late to incorporate it into your parenting.

Many of us have behaviors we'd LOVE to change. But many of those

Imagine you are an athlete at the Olympics. You have trained for years and years. You have dreamed of this moment. Your entire country is watching you, cheering for you, even praying that you will win.

There is a lot of pressure and so much riding on your performance. But you have trained for thousands of hours and everything rests on this moment. There is noise and energy coming from the audience. And because you are a fighter, your opponent wants to destroy you.

How do you find your focus? It is one thing to talk about mindfulness and the power of therapy in everyday life. But putting these to the test in this scenario is an entirely different ball game. 

Most of us will never experience what I just described, but my guest on this episode did just that. And as you’ll hear, mindfulness, therapy and, of course, spectacular amounts of practice and preparation made a big difference. Ori Sasson is a two-time bronze medalist at the Olympics where he competed on behalf of Israel. I would describe Ori as a gentle giant. And Ori has explored his sensitivity and anxiety through therapy and found ways to channel these qualities to find greater strength inside and outside of Judo competition.

As you’ll hear Ori is generous in sharing his recipe for success. And sadly, as of this recording, rockets are flying over Israel. Ori and I were meant to meet four weeks ago, but he needed to cancel due to these rockets and he nearly needed to cancel our interview today for the second time due to their persistent presence.

In spite of these challenges and his WiFi being down, he found a way to make it to the interview. Today, Ori uses the knowledge he gained from Judo competition to assist company employees to find success. So, listen in as Ori shares his secrets for success inside and outside the ring.