Unlocking Relationship Secrets: Communication, Childhood Patterns, and Dating Advice with Michelle Bohls

Michellebohls.com

About the Guest(s):

Michelle Bohls is a seasoned licensed marriage and family therapist with over 15 years of experience in her field. Prior to her therapeutic practice, Michelle worked with executives to help them navigate career changes and build effective teams. She is part of an international faculty teaching "Imago," a system of relationship intelligence based on the bestselling book "Getting the Love You Want" by Harville Hendrix and Helen Kelley Hunt. Michelle is deeply passionate about exploring topics such as intuition, money relationships, and romantic connections. Her insights into human interactions have helped countless individuals and couples lead more fulfilling lives.

Episode Summary:

In this enlightening episode of The Chris Voss Show, host Chris Voss welcomes Michelle Bohls, an expert in relationship intelligence, to discuss the core principles of building sustainable and meaningful relationships. Michelle shares insights from her extensive experience as a marriage and family therapist and touches on themes from the book "Getting the Love You Want." As the conversation unfolds, listeners are treated to a deep dive into understanding the dynamics of personal belief systems, communication challenges, and childhood influences that impact adult relationships. Michelle's expertise provides invaluable guidance for couples and singles alike, offering strategies to foster healthier connections.

The episode covers essential topics surrounding relationship dynamics and personal growth. Through candid discussions, Chris and Michelle address common pitfalls in communication and the unconscious belief systems that often dictate our emotional responses and relational patterns. Michelle underscores the importance of understanding unmet needs rooted in childhood experiences, which she likens to a GPS guiding individuals' life choices. This knowledge empowers listeners to embark on a journey of self-discovery, offering them the tools to make more conscious and rewarding relationship decisions.

Key Takeaways:

Understanding Relationship Dynamics: Recognizing the influence of childhood experiences and unmet needs on adult relationships is crucial for fostering meaningful connections.

Communication as a Skill: Effective communication is more about genuine listening and understanding rather than just solving problems or fulfilling one's own agenda.

Belief Systems and Personal Development: Our belief systems, developed early on, play a significant role in how we perceive relationships and navigate life changes.

Navigating Modern Dating Challenges: The current dating culture involves overcoming option overload and focusing on genuine connections instead of superficial interactions.

Building Awareness and Initiating Change: A conscious approach to relationships, supported by tools such as therapy or workshops, can significantly improve personal and relational well-being.

Notable Quotes:

"Most couples are struggling with an attitude problem… You should be perfect. You should meet all my needs." - Michelle Bohls

"Understanding what shaped us early on, what are these needs that were not met… that is operating like a GPS." - Michelle Bohls

"Relationships are supposed to be a team sport… when love shows up fully ready to meet your needs, you're like, hmm, no, I gotta pass." - Michelle Bohls

"We unconsciously create our greatest fears… we recreate the patterns that we lived through early on unconsciously." - Michelle Bohls

"A weekend workshop is great… uncover the trauma buried pretty deep and work through it in a supportive environment." - Michelle Bohls