Terry Real has spent 40 years working with couples on the brink of divorce, and he argues the core problem is that we live in a culture that values personal growth and ignores relational growth. Women have changed. Men largely have not. And the result is a silent crisis playing out inside marriages around the world.

In this conversation, Terry and Lorin go deep on what it actually takes to build a lasting relationship: why traditional masculinity is, in Terry's words, a relational disability; the difference between individual empowerment and relational empowerment; how to hold your ground and love someone at the same time; and why shame and grandiosity are two sides of the same coin.

This is one of the most direct, practical conversations on real relationship work you will find anywhere.

Referenced in this episode:

• terryreal.com | Terry Real, creator of Relational Life Therapy
• Terry Real on Instagram: @realterryreal
• YouTube: ‪@realterryreal‬

Books mentioned in the episode: https://terryreal.com/books/

• Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
• I Don't Want to Talk About It

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Inner Child

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Most people on a healing journey believe they have moved past their parents' patterns. They meditate, they do the inner work, they say with real conviction, "I am nothing like my mother" or "I am nothing like my father." And yet the same reactions keep showing up in their closest relationships: shutting down, getting defensive, feeling criticized when nothing critical was said.

In this episode, Lorin breaks down one of the most overlooked layers of healing the mother and father wound: the unconscious imprints that get passed down and repeated, even by people who consciously tried to do the opposite of what their parents did.

Lorin shares a personal story about his father, who vowed never to repeat his own father's emotional absence and showed up far more present in many ways, yet still passed down a version of that same wound in a different form. This becomes the entry point for a wider look at two layers of healing: the work of addressing the relationship with a parent directly through boundaries, letting go of guilt, or cord cutting, and the much harder work of recognizing where their reactions, defensiveness, avoidance, the need to explain or defend yourself, have become part of your own.

Lorin walks through how to spot these patterns in daily life, why the shadow works so hard to keep them hidden, and what changes the moment they are brought into the light, both in yourself and with the people you love most.

He closes with two practical steps anyone can take to start identifying and working with their own imprint.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Inner Child

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Most men believe they are showing up fully in their relationships. They are doing everything right on paper. And yet something feels off. The intimacy is not quite there, the trust is not fully built, and resentment quietly grows.

In this episode, Lorin breaks down one of the most misunderstood dynamics in relationships: what happens when a man turns his partner into his source of meaning, identity, and purpose, and why, despite his best intentions, it creates the opposite of what he wants.

Lorin explores the difference between a man who has found his deepest calling and commits to a relationship from that place of fullness, and a man who is unconsciously asking his partner to give him what only he can find within himself. Over time, this erodes trust, produces resentment, and leaves both people feeling disconnected.

This episode also speaks directly to women, helping them recognize this dynamic and understand what is actually happening beneath the surface.

Lorin closes with two practical steps any man can take right now.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Inner Child

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

When a man shuts down in relationship, the common belief is that he doesn't care, that he's avoidant, or that he doesn't love her. A man who shuts down is actually a man overwhelmed by feeling, gripped by shame, trying to cope with an experience that feels too big to regulate.

Shame is different from guilt. Guilt says "I've done something wrong." Shame says "there is something wrong with me." It's a crushing belief of being bad and unworthy. When a woman expresses upset or pours love into the relationship, it can activate this old wound in a man, and his system responds by disappearing.

What follows is a painful loop. The woman feels rejected by his silence and becomes more intense in trying to reach him. Her response, though loving, pushes him further into shame. Her wound that she is too much and his wound that he is not enough affirm each other, even as both long for connection.

The way through is for the man to face his shame. Naming it, owning it without collapse, staying connected to breath and body. The practice is about cultivating the capacity to stay a little more open, a little more present, even when triggered. From that place, a man becomes someone a woman can deeply trust.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Healing Your Inner Child

Many men open their hearts and become emotionally available, but lose themselves in the process. They suppress vital masculine traits like boldness, decisiveness, and having an edge. The result is a man who becomes available but loses his spine.

But a truly powerful man embodies both softness and fierceness. He brings heart openness and surrender at home while showing up with a strong spine in the world, standing in truth and power.

When they express masculinity from an unconscious level or try to overcompensate, men remain incomplete. A man stuck in only softness loses attraction, safety, and respect from the feminine. A man stuck in only structure loses trust and connection. People walk over the too-careful man, while the heartless warrior causes pain.

The world desperately needs men who don't back down, who stand in truth, who fight when necessary, but whose hearts remain wide open.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Healing Your Inner Child

Old souls carry a profound gift: depth, intuition, and awareness that others rarely match. But this gift comes with a sharp edge: the loneliness of never feeling truly met, whether in friendships, family, or love.

In this episode, Lorin offers a way for old souls to stop fighting the cycles of peak awareness and grief, and to undergo a spiritual death and rebirth, so that the very depth that once isolated them becomes magnetic, drawing the right people, circumstances, and love into their lives.

Without this process, we stay trapped in the loop. We keep experiencing transcendent moments only to collapse back into old wounds of isolation.

This is an invitation to let that grief of not-belonging carve out deeper space for your truth.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Healing Your Inner Child

We're constantly bombarded with negative information that hijacks our attention and drains our energy. Social media algorithms are designed to trigger emotional reactions, leaving us feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and disconnected from reality. When we scroll through disturbing content, we often mistake other people's fear for our own, identifying with emotions that aren't even ours.

Instead of shutting down when faced with distressing information, we need to step back and ask “what's beyond this? What's the bigger picture?” When we do this, we realise the alarming messages we're seeing represent only a tiny sliver of reality, not the whole truth.

1. Five Days to Calm Your Mind and Meet Your Spirit – Jeffrey’s course, FREE to Lorin’s listeners
2. Jeffrey’s website
3. Spirit Mind – Jeffrey’s work with Hisami
4. Follow @iamjeffreyallen on Instagram
5. Follow Jeffrey on YouTube

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Inner Child

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Most of us are trapped in an invisible prison of our own conditioning. We've spent decades absorbing narratives about who we should be, what we should achieve, and how we should prove our worth. These stories run so deep we don't even realise they're there anymore.

But when we're willing to look honestly at our reactions, fears, and patterns within relationships, we can finally see where we're not free. This applies to romantic partnerships especially, but also to our connections with colleagues… even AI.

Without addressing these patterns, we become masters of our limitations. We might achieve material success, make money, tick all the boxes, but we'll still feel like we're hitting our head against a wall.

This discussion with expert coach Peter Crone offers a moment of honest reflection which can help you reveal the invisible container you've been living within.

1. Follow @petercrone on Instagram
2. Learn more about Peter’s Freedom membership
3. Learn more about Peter's Mastermind

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Inner Child

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Many spiritually intelligent people are draining their power because they're trying to help others. They're caught in a saviour pattern that has a spiritual mask around it, leading to misaligned connections where their energy is drained. At worst, people end up in abusive dynamics while trying to help someone who isn't open to receiving that help.

True service energises you because there's a flow of energy: you give from your heart, and the recipient is open to receiving what you offer. There's no expectation of specific returns, but there must be receptivity. Serving nourishes your soul, while saving depletes it.

Saviour patterns drain our power and peace. Our energy becomes scattered and drained as we try to force outcomes with people who aren't receptive. But this episode offers practical ways to check if you’re in saviour mode, and begin to protect your energy.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Healing Your Inner Child

Conventional dating simply doesn't work for old souls. The games, pretending, and shallow dynamics that are normalised in modern dating are completely draining for spiritually mature people who are oriented toward truth and authenticity.

People who continue pursuing conventional dating methods often find themselves in a cycle of frustration and misalignment. This lower vibration attracts more of the same energy, leading to wasted time with incompatible partners. The resistance created from this frustration only pushes the right person further away.

If you’re an old soul, you have permission to stop forcing yourself into misaligned dating experiences and instead focus on living truthfully. When we align with our soul's purpose and truth, we naturally attract the right person through resonance rather than performance. Old souls are meant to meet, not search or chase.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine

Healing Your Inner Child