Dr. Lilia Graue is a treasured colleague and friend who is both an experienced Mindbody Medicine Practitioner and someone I found as an ally in the unique challenges that people of size face in accessing supportive care on their journey with pain.

This episode she shares her personal pain recovery story as well as some research on weight stigma, dieting, threat physiology and how to approach creating corrective experiences in healing.

Dr. Lilia Graue is a physician, psychotherapist, and mindbody healing mentor.

After living with chronic pain for more than a decade, she found freedom through an integrative mindbody approach grounded in neuroscience, mindfulness, and compassion.

Today, she supports people living with chronic pain, fatigue, long COVID, and other persistent symptoms to reconnect with safety, vitality, and agency. She also mentors fellow practitioners—therapists, coaches, and clinicians—to create trauma-integrative, relational, and sustainable healing spaces.  

With over 25 years of experience in medicine and psychotherapy, Dr. Graue’s work prioritizes consent, curiosity, and co-creation, honoring individual context, systemic influences, and the power of genuine relationship in supporting long-term change and healing. She works with people globally in both English and Spanish.

Originally from Mexico City, she currently lives in London with her husband and the two adorable rescue cats who own them, Ziggy and Lupito. In addition to her work, she loves spending time in nature, baking, reading, traveling, and enjoying live music.

Dr. Lilia Graue's website - https://liliagraue.com/

Take her in-depth mind-body assessment - https://liliagraue.com/in-depth-assessment

Sign up to her newsletter! -  https://liliagraue.com/enchanted-loom 

She also has a couple of spots open for her 1:1 mentorship programs: 

Reclaim Your Life - https://liliagraue.com/reclaim-your-life  

Replenish Your Practice - https://liliagraue.com/replenish-your-practice

Research mentioned in the conversation:

Physiologic Responses to Sensory Stimulation by Food: Nutritional Implications by RICHARD D. MATTES PhD, RD - https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0002822397001016

What’s Wrong With the ‘War on Obesity?’ A Narrative Review of the Weight-Centered Health Paradigm and Development of the 3C Framework to Build Critical Competency for a Paradigm Shift by Lily O’Hara and Jane Taylor - https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/2158244018772888

Coming to terms with fear by Joseph E LeDoux - https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3939902/

Fear conditioning as a pathogenic mechanism in the postural tachycardia syndrome by Lucy Norcliffe-Kaufmann... - https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10200284/

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

In this episode I share some advice I gave to a client today about moving themselves away from creating a ritual or a rigid response to a new symptoms that's showing up for them. When we "thingify" anything, we are teaching the brain a heuristic, a pattern that it will subconsconciously learn and uphold. Since this client and I have worked together for awhile and they've relieved the majority of their symptoms, they were able to catch their pattern of creating safety by controlling and ritualizing their response to symptoms.  

At the heart of mindbody work we are always working with increasing safety and dialing down fear, cultivating a sense of curiosity and self kindness when difficult thoughts, feelings + sensations arise.  

I share a bit of my own health journey, my book writing and the most recent retreat I went on.  

Check it out and find those aha tidbits that help you feel even more brave, more clear on your mindbody healing path.  

I'm always happy for you to reach out and book a curiosity call! 

If you want to know more about Amber's retreats....
https://amberkarnes.com/retreats/

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

Hello my feelers + healers!  

I went on an almost 3 week trip that involved 4 flights, 7 train rides, a few metro rides, 3 countries, 6 cities.  
And a lot of walking.
And some boat rides.
I was definitely nervous before this trip.

I was remembering last year's Galapagos trip which yes was a lot more "adventure travel" than this one.
But yanno part of the brain's job is to try to predict + problem solve the future so that you can be safe.  
So I had some prep work mentally and emotionally to do. Mostly to remind myself that whatever happens on this trip I'll be ok.
It can be a complete disaster and while I might be disappointed I'll be ok.

It's so funny when I was on my trip I had so much to say.
Now that I've been home for a month, I can't remember.

But I can remember how I feel now and I think that's important because it's tied into how I helped myself on the trip and how that subconscious programming has continued to be metabolized and integrated into my beliefs about my body, what it's capable of and how to continue on the journey of expanding my physical and emotional capacity, while decreasing a sense of fear, threat or danger.  

Traveling is definitely a place where I see fear arise for myself and my clients. There's SO MUCH unknown.

And there's so much that's out of our control and out of our routine. AND that's what makes it perfect for creating corrective experiences and new predictive coding for our brain, body + nervous system.

Listen well and think about how you can create those corrective experiences for yourself.

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

I was inspired by my friend and fellow coach Maggie Reyes after listening to a podcast of hers on emotional leadership. I felt like the topic resonated for me personally and for my clients. I am always thinking of how to shift into a state of self connective empowerment no matter what is happening in your body and your life.  

As Vanessa Blackstone said in episode 47, mindbody work is akin to relationship coaching and I know no one better to talk about relationships than Maggie. Please enjoy and listen with the mindset of a what resonates with me and how can I apply these ideas for my highest benefit and deepest self connection.

Maggie Reyes is a Master Certified Life Coach & Marriage Mentor who helps high-achieving women excel in both their relationships and leadership roles without burning out or sacrificing connection. Maggie brings a practical, down-to-earth feminist, and compassionate approach to relationship transformation and personal development.

Through her signature approaches like Soul-Centered Communication and the 5 Relationship Powers framework, Maggie guides women to transform resentment into connection and overwhelm into clarity. Her clients report remarkable results - from feeling happier around their partners and resolving conflicts more quickly, to developing stronger communication skills that transfer directly to their leadership roles.

Her clients are typically executives, business owners, and professionals who read both Harvard Business Review and Brené Brown, and who value both strategic solutions and soulful approaches.

What makes Maggie's approach unique is that she works with women individually to transform their relationships - even when their partners aren't participating in the process. Through a unique blend of cognitive coaching and somatic practices, she helps clients question limiting beliefs and create new patterns that serve them better. The same skills that create extraordinary marriages translate directly to leadership effectiveness, helping her clients become more influential and impactful in all areas of life.

She's committed to helping women lead from their power, not their exhaustion, both at home and at work. Her signature concept of becoming "Sexy Besties" with your partner describes that perfect balance of deep friendship and passionate connection that characterizes thriving relationships.

Maggie met her husband on Christmas Day and has been married for over 17 years. Her Marriage Life Coach Podcast ranks in the top 2% globally, and she's the author of the bestselling Questions for Couples Journal with over 3,000 positive reviews. With more than 2,000 hours of coaching experience, Maggie makes complex concepts delightfully simple while honoring their depth.

Here's links to the episodes we discussed in the podcast - 
Episode 182 – The Hidden Power of Emotional Leadership: Why Going First Transforms Your Marriage
Move With Deb, Episode 69, Embodying Systems Thinking

Website link

https://maggiereyes.com/

Instagram link

https://www.instagram.com/themaggiereyes/

Facebook link

https://www.facebook.com/TheMaggieReyes/

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

Gather around as I share a story of fear and anxiety and how it showed up in my body and how I met the moment through a mindbody lens.

I can be an anxious bunny, with big feelings but I don’t normally have fear like this. Soooooooo not fun but I got to see the opportunity in it to practice self compassion, self connection and collaborating with self through the fear.

In the world in which we cannot and do not control everything, collaboration, connection and trust are essential skills to develop and we all have our own experiences both personally, generationally and historically with these ideas. Learning how to increase your somatic curiosity can help you walk back from panic into security, from fear and flares into self trust and nervous system settling.

The mind and the body are gateways into your whole being and opportunities for healing are ever present. And we never stop being human. So please enjoy a peek into a part of my life in which I again am my own client, soothing my own fears and witnessing with so much love my own 💩.

If you know that you want judgement free support for your own exploration, please book a call and let’s talk about how this work can help you

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

This is a fun conversation about a not fun topic, healing from chronic pelvic pain. Rachel and I are mindbody besties, our work is deeply rooted in learning and teaching these skills of body trust and always believing the recovery is available for everyone in any body. I hope you listen with wide open ears, catching any themes that might resonate for you. And with any of my interviews, I invite you to imagine applying these concepts to you in your life. How can you start to view your symptoms and your life differently?

To me, Rachel is a hero of self determination, someone willing to step through fear, pain, discomfort and trauma with such passion and self compassion. It's not an easy path as you will discover, but she and I share the sentiment that once you understand neuroplastic pain it's hard to view our human experience through a different lens.  

Rachel is a Doctor of Physical Therapy and pelvic pain coach who specializes in guiding women with chronic pelvic pain to heal through a holistic mind-body approach. Her own journey of healing from chronic pelvic pain inspired her to pursue this work, and she now dedicates her career to guiding and supporting others through their own paths to recovery. With years of experience in both clinical practice and coaching, Rachel empowers her clients to not only heal their pain but also to create full and empowered lives rooted in connection and intention as they heal. Her unique approach combines expert knowledge with compassionate coaching, providing women with the tools to feel safe in their bodies, live freely, and foster deeper, more meaningful connections with themselves and others as they heal. 

If you’re ready to start healing TODAY and want a clear, flexible roadmap, Beyond Chronic Pelvic Pain: The Self-Paced Course is the place to begin. You’ll learn the core mind-body and nervous system tools she used to heal—and have helped dozens of clients do the same. 
Click the link below to learn more! https://thepelvicpaincoach.com/course

https://thepelvicpaincoach.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thepelvicpaincoach/

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

Heads up people, in this episode I'm speaking with PRT therapist Caryn Sherbet about their pain + symptom recovery journey as well as their work with Exposure both in their clinical practice of ERP as well as in their private life with BDSM. We don't go into detail (so get your mind out of the gutter *wink*) but they speak about how the concepts of pain on purpose aka using exposure can decrease  threat, fear + change the meaning of the symptoms.

One of the incredible pieces of knowledge they drop is that anxiety is not an emotion, it's a coping mechanism. It's a strategy of the brain to keep us safe. We talk about all the various entry points to risk, there is in life and how pursuing freedom and our desires can lead us to creating more and more of a felt sense of safety using these tools. I hope this podcast helps you discover your embodied pathways to expansion, exposure and the ability to turn down the danger alarm bell and turn up freedom and fearlessness.

Caryn is a Brooklyn-based psychotherapist who specializes in treating the intersection of OCD, chronic pain, and sexual trauma. They are trained in Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP) and in Pain Reprocessing Therapy (PRT), which they use to help clients create safety in moments of physical and emotional pain alike. Caryn is especially passionate about working with members of the LGBTQ+ community to heal from interpersonal and structural trauma.
 

carynsherbettherapy.com
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/caryn-sherbet-brooklyn-ny/1043122

Caryn's offering a free Chronic Pain for Freaks Workshop 
Wednesday, June 11, 7-8:30pm EST 
RSVP link
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSf2tRhAJ_Swu79Cafv2ZNvhM_Z1dyWXdLT4e5ipyHWRUw-n8w/viewform

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

This episode was inspired by the conversation I had with therapist Caryn Sherbet, which will be my next podcast. They're a new PRT therapist and we chatted about the gifts of exposure response therapy for all kinds of situations we encounter that trigger our avoidance response.  

In this episode, I take you through two experiences that are more aligned with emotional pain but hey you all know that can often be a trigger for physical pain, or go hand in hand with it (hey that's a great podcast idea). But I walk you through the avoidance/approach process that I used to help me transform two tender emotional experiences I was having that was causing me to avoid taking aligned actions. In the process I was able to further neutralize two stories that I've been carrying around for years, "I don't get things done" and "Being fat means I'm not worthy of love (and not currently being in a relationship is proof)."

Here's the link for a faster EFT technique - https://youtu.be/wpYjrdl7PMo?si=ida8WiV1uHo_QooE

As I say in the episode, I'm in a fierce transformation phase of my life, having finished the majority of heavy lifting of activities around my Dad's passing as well as the coming of Spring. As I get more friendly with what triggers avoidance, I'm able to gently use my tools of neuroplasticity and psychophysiological recoding processes to rewire those habitual responses from a place of self compassion and strength vs. secretly reinforcing my old belief systems. Having a self connecting intention is the key to this approach.  

I'm opening my doors for working with new clients. Please book a curiosity call and let's chat about how working together can help you feel more better more of the time. Or all of the time, don't let me create any limitations on how good it can get!

And if getting an astrology reading is something in your house of desire I highly recommend working with Miss Renee. She's been someone who has served as a touchstone for me over the years when I need just enough clarity to get me heading in the right direction. Her intentions are always to give someone back to themselves, to feel empowered in their deepest self love and connection - https://missreneehealing.com/
 

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

This episode I share two embodied experiences I had of meeting a moment of high arousal emotion, of frustration and anger. High arousal doesn't mean sexual, it mean how much energy is behind it.

Here's a great visual describing arousal + valence as a map for emotions.
https://neurodivergentinsights.com/arousal-valence-model/

When I was able to witness and meet my emotional need in the moment my body really allowed me to stay present in a positive way and I was able to stay on task and reach my desired goal. It was a really beautiful experience of witnessing and working the mindbody tools.

I hope that this episode helps you feel witnessed and validated and given permission to feel whatever you're feeling and feel empowered by that. 

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com

This episode has been inspired by my own process of moving from stuckness + fear into action and loving self connection. It seems like wherever I am in my process, these principles are essential for change, noticing, curiosity, and consent. Recovery from neuroplastic symptoms is a dance of intimacy, intimacy with ourselves. And being on board with doing this work takes bravery, stubborness in the best way, stubborn for our future selves. And it also takes getting into the heart of love.  

In this podcast I share some ideas I've been using for myself to help shift my physical and emotional energy. I imagine there's at least one idea I offer here that might inspire you.

I have openings in my schedule for new clients. Have you wanted a coach to ride alongside you on your healing journey? Do you hate the words, healing journey? No problem, I can help you find just the right way for you to conceptualize these ideas and move you forward in your unique to you process. I'm kind of like one of those sleep mattress number beds, soft when you want and more firm when you need. Book a free curiosity call and let's talk.

Book a free half hour curiosity call with me - https://calendly.com/paincoachdeb

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/pain.coach.deb/

Website - https://www.thecuriositycure.com