The Divorce Course Podcast

Are you trying to figure out how to divide the property after your separation or divorce? In this eye-opening episode, I sit down with my mum, but also an experienced family lawyer — and we walk you through the eight most common ways people settle property in Australia.

Whether you're hoping to keep the house, want a clean break, or are totally confused by super splitting, we're breaking it all down for you. From simple percentage splits to creative asset swaps — and even the risks of doing absolutely nothing — this episode is your go-to guide for understanding your options.

If you've been wondering how the Family Court might view your proposed agreement, or you just want clarity before making any big decisions, this one's for you.

⚠️ Trigger Warning: We do talk about separation, divorce, and family and domestic violence in this episode. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: Everything shared here is general info only — not legal advice. Always speak to your own lawyer about your unique situation before making any decisions or signing anything.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If You:

🏡 You're separated and thinking about how to split your assets

🤔 You've heard "it's always 50/50" and you're not sure if that's true

🔑 You're trying to keep the house, super, or a specific asset

😵‍💫 You're overwhelmed by all the legal options

😟 You're scared of doing the "wrong" thing with your property settlement

⚖️ You want a fair deal that protects your financial future

🧠 You're a visual thinker and need real examples to understand your options

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE just a discussion about Australian Family Law and Divorce or DeFacto Separation.

🔑 Key Topics Discussed in This Episode

1. What a property settlement actually is – and why it matters after separation

2. Common myths about property division – including the truth behind "it's always 50/50"

3. The 8 different ways you can reach a property settlement – from informal agreements to full court proceedings

4. How to decide which option is right for you – based on your safety, finances, and communication with your ex

5. The risks of doing nothing – and why delays can cost you more than just money

6. Keeping the house, super, or other assets – what's realistic and what the court considers

7. How to protect yourself legally and financially – especially in high-conflict or coercive control situations

8. When and how to get legal advice – and how to prepare for it

9. Case examples to help you understand what each option might look like in real life

10. What to do if your ex won't cooperate or communicate

🎙️ Related Episodes:

• Consent Orders vs BFAs: What's Best for You https://open.spotify.com/episode/5qgGhdAl5UaOo7LHb2Yf5Y?si=1d87hZ-iQ2iPadSuzyHBAQ

• I Really, Really Want to Keep the House https://open.spotify.com/episode/6TzW9skKgvO8fjm0gcFPRg?si=uz9H0V3eRsaXzKKoLlMfaA

• Selling the House in Divorce: What You Need to Know https://open.spotify.com/episode/6YUc34CVu6aCmunjQT1Sp6?si=7I8graLWQrm3PD_4brxOng

⚠️ Emergency Contacts & Support Services:

💜 Women's Shelter Service: Call 1800 811 811 ⚖️ Legal Aid: Visit Legal Aid Website 📞 Lifeline (24/7 Crisis Support): Call 13 11 14 👨‍👦 Mensline Australia: Call 1300 789 978 👧 Kids Help Line: Call 1800 551 800 🚨 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800 RESPECT): Call 1800 737 732 🖤 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1800 019 123

⏳ Episode Timeline:

0:00 – Trigger warning and legal disclaimer

1:00 – What are we covering in today's divorce property settlement episode?

2:00 – What is the classic percentage split in a divorce—and how does it work?

3:30 – Why isn't property always divided 50/50 in a divorce? What factors do courts consider?

5:30 – What are the risks of saying "You take the house, I'll take the super" during divorce?

7:00 – When would this kind of divorce agreement be rejected by the court?

9:00 – Should we just sell everything and divide the cash after a divorce?

11:30 – Why can selling assets post-divorce shrink your overall property pool?

13:00 – What happens if one person buys the other out in a divorce settlement?

15:30 – How do you make sure the house is valued fairly during divorce proceedings?

17:00 – Can we trade assets like cars for cash or super for shares in a divorce?

18:30 – Is super always equal in value when dividing assets in divorce?

20:00 – What is superannuation splitting—and how does it work in a divorce?

22:00 – Is equalizing superannuation always a fair solution in divorce settlements?

23:30 – Can one person take on debt in exchange for more assets—and is that safe in a divorce?

25:00 – What are the legal risks when one partner takes on joint debt after divorce?

27:00 – What happens if we leave everything as it is and avoid a divorce property settlement?

29:30 – What real divorce stories show why doing nothing can go wrong?

33:00 – What are the new 2025 divorce-related laws—and how does post-separation spending affect your case?

34:30 – How can you figure out what's fair in your unique divorce situation?

Episode 193 Beyond 50/50: Creative & Legal Ways to Settle Property in Divorce in Australia

#DivorceSupport #PropertySettlement #FamilyLawAustralia #SeparationSupport #DivorceTips #KeepTheHouse #SuperSplit #FinancialAbuseAwareness #FairDivorce #LegalHelp #SplitAssets #CoParentingSupport #EqualPropertySplit #FamilyCourtMatters #DivorceCoursePodcast

In this eye-opening and practical episode,a seasoned family lawyer helps to unpack the 10 most frequently asked questions about child custody in Australia.

Whether you're fresh out of a breakup, preparing for court, or trying to figure out what your rights are, this episode is packed with general education and emotional clarity every separated parent needs. From understanding how courts decide who gets custody, to navigating situations involving domestic violence, high-conflict co-parents, and parenting plans this episode helps you gain a better understanding of what's what in child custody issues.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If You...

• Are recently separated and unsure where to start

• Want to learn how to understand your parental rights in court

• Are co-parenting with someone difficult, absent, or controlling

• Are trying to protect your child from a harmful environment

• Need clarity around parenting plans vs court orders

• Are preparing to go to family court

• Feel overwhelmed by legal jargon and want straight answers

⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussions about family and domestic violence.

📌 Legal Disclaimer: This podcast provides general information only and does not constitute legal advice. Every family law case is different, and you should always seek professional legal support specific to your circumstances.

📌 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode:

• Official Parenting Orders: Do I really need them? 🎧 https://open.spotify.com/episode/7xeIIHEDcFPKwtVZ54fM67?si=vwYKXPZHRRCISokEuc2D-Q

• Case Mentioned: Isles & Nelissen [2022] FedcFAMC1A 97 – an "unacceptable risk" family court case

📚 Links & Resources

• 🧾 Word Salad Checklist (Download) - https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/wordsaladchecklist

• 📞 1800 RESPECT – Support for family and domestic violence

• 📞 Lifeline (13 11 14) – Mental health and emotional support

• 📞 000 – In case of immediate danger

⏱️ Timeline Summary

00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warnings

01:02 Understanding Child Custody

02:08 Immediate Steps After Separation

03:19 Consent Orders vs Parenting Plans

04:33 High Conflict Situations

05:56 What is the Best Interests of the Child

15:07 What is the difference between Legal vs Physical Custody

18:39 Domestic Violence and Custody

23:33 Surgical Risk and Legal Analogies

24:21 Can My Child Decide Who They Want to Live With?

24:26 Webinar Invitation: Empower Yourself Through Divorce

25:40 Can I Relocate with my child and Custody: Legal Insights

27:14 What can I do if my ex is Threatening of International Relocation

27:54 Joint Custody: Pros, Cons, and Realities

30:18 Proving an Ex is Unfit for Custody

31:26 How do you Modify and Enforce Custody Arrangements

33:30 How to Deal with Manipulative and Controlling Exes

34:08 High Conflict Custody Situations

36:20 Avoidant Exes and Custody Challenges

38:08 Final Thoughts and Support Resources

🔖 Hashtags (for Social Media)

#ChildCustody #FamilyLawAustralia #ParentingAfterSeparation #HighConflictDivorce #CoParenting #FamilyCourt #LegalParenting #DomesticViolenceAwareness #SharedParenting #CustodyBattle #DivorceSupport #ConsentOrders #ParentingPlan #FamilyLawHelp #ProtectiveParenting

📌 Final Disclaimer: Nothing discussed in this episode should be taken as legal advice. Please speak with a qualified legal professional who understands your personal situation and jurisdiction.

🎙️ Episode Title: Top 10 Child Custody Questions Answered (What Parents Need to Know)

Feeling trapped in limbo while waiting for your property settlement to go through? You're not alone — and there may be a way out.

In this episode, I'm joined again by my mum, Lynette Galvin — a family lawyer with over 35 years of experience — and we're talking about a powerful but underused legal option called early distribution of funds.

This is a game-changer for anyone financially stuck during separation. Whether you're separated under one roof, struggling to pay rent, or locked out of joint funds, this episode is full of practical ideas to help you understand some options. We'll walk through how it works, who it can help, how to ask for it, and what to do if you're facing financial abuse or coercive control.

If even one person hears this and realizes they can ask for access to their own money — then this episode has done its job.

Legal Disclaimer: This is not legal advice please see a lawyer before making any decisions.

⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses financial abuse and coercive control. If you find this triggering, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or 1800RESPECT.

🎧 Listen to this episode if…

• You've separated from your partner but are still waiting for the property to be divided

• You're struggling financially and wondering if you can access money now

• You're living under the same roof as your ex and things are tense or unsafe

• You've heard "you just have to wait" from a lawyer or friend

• You're dealing with financial abuse or coercive control

• You want to understand your rights and feel more empowered in the process

• You're looking for a way to shift the balance in negotiations or court

⏱️ Episode Timeline

0:00 - A warm welcome and why this episode matters if you're stuck during property settlement 2:00 - What is early distribution of funds, and why more people should know about it 4:00 - Who qualifies? Scenarios from both wealthy and struggling couples 5:45 - Why financial abuse and coercive control may be stopping you from accessing your money 8:00 - The new definition of family violence and how it can work in your favour 10:30 - How to structure your request so it's fair and has a better chance of success 12:45 - The mindset shift: realizing you're entitled to ask 14:30 - What the courts consider when deciding to release funds early 16:30 - Step-by-step: how to apply and what documents you'll need 19:45 - Going to court: what to expect, what to say, and how to prepare 23:30 - Common misconceptions and sneaky tactics to watch for 26:45 - Can superannuation be released early? (Spoiler: unlikely!) 28:00 - Risks of early distribution: What you need to know before you ask 29:30 - How releasing funds can shift power and break negotiation deadlock 31:45 - How to approach this with different ex-partner personality types in Divorce 36:00 - The quote Mum wants on a cushion: "If you don't ask, you don't get."

🔗 Links & Resources

• 📘 Definition of Family Violence – Family Law Act (Section 4AB)

• 🧠 Free checklists and resources — mediation prep, disclosure, and more

• 🎧 Episode on Balancing the Unbalanced in family law negotiations

• https://open.spotify.com/episode/1YbIll7Ti69WGd9OpbmjDb?si=JlxhC1wBTkaOILAIVYdYaw

• 🎧 Episode on Response to Initiating Application (for court document guidance)

• https://open.spotify.com/episode/2JV5mcqDB7Wu6lEAFVO2w1?si=-VMYcvlpSSqxn-RrDeJgCg

• Definition of Family Violence

https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s4ab.html

📝 Closing Thoughts

This episode is your reminder that you have options — and you don't have to wait until the final property settlement to start rebuilding your life. If you're in a tough spot financially, please talk to your lawyer about an early distribution. And if they say no, ask why.

You deserve to feel safe and supported through this process.

If you found this episode helpful, we'd be so grateful if you could rate, follow, and share the podcast. You never know who else out there might need this information right now. 💛

Are you? Learn about the signs of economic or financial abuse, hear some real-life examples of how economic abuse manifests in relationships and practical steps you can take to protect yourself and your financial future. Find out how it is legally recognized under the Australian Family Law Amendment Act 2024, and why it's considered a form of coercive control. Also find out about the new laws effective from June 2025 and how they impact property settlements and financial disputes.

🚨 Trigger Warning: This episode discusses economic abuse and coercive control, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you need support, please contact 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Lifeline for confidential advice and assistance.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If You:

✅ Feel like your partner controls your money or financial decisions ❓ Have been told you're "bad with money" or pressured into signing financial documents 💡 Are worried that financial abuse is continuing after separation 🛡 Want to understand how the new legal changes address economic abuse 📚 Need advice on documenting financial control and seeking help 💔 Are experiencing financial stress during or after separation

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE just a discussion about Australian Family Law and Divorce or DeFacto Separation.

Key Topics Discussed in This Episode:

• What is Economic and Financial Abuse?

• Signs and Red Flags of Economic Abuse

• How Economic Abuse Is a Form of Coercive Control

• Legal Changes: Economic Abuse Recognized as Family Violence

• Impact on Property Settlements and Financial Outcomes

• How to Protect Yourself from Economic and Financial Abuse

• Support Services and Resources for Victims

📌 Links & Resources Mentioned:

🔗 1800 RESPECT – Support for family and domestic violence:

• Website: 1800respect.org.au

• Phone: 1800 737 732

🔗 National Debt Helpline – Financial counselling and support:

• Website: ndh.org.au

• Phone: 1800 007 007

🔗 Men's Referral Service – Support for men using or experiencing violence:

• Website: mrs.org.au

• Phone: 1800 943 539

🔗 Understanding Coercive Control – Australian Government Resource:

• Website: Australian Government Resource on Coercive Control

🎙️ Related Episodes:

1. Recognizing Coercive Control: How to Protect Yourself https://open.spotify.com/episode/12jgZw1IwIFLK5oPlp0its?si=CvxdW85YRJ6e9pX1katgPQ

2. Navigating Financial Disclosure in Family Court https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosurechecklist

3. Understanding Emotional Abuse: Signs, Impact, and Recovery https://open.spotify.com/episode/2bSCQ3JdcU4xxW7D4LJUxG?si=ujMpXOD8QzeLbeA_rlC4Ew

4. How to Tell Your Story and Communicate Coercive Control in Your Documents https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Ci0M4DqznBf1L1kcZM3vY?si=rO-DnFixQqKTPMCbkpe3jA

⚠️ Emergency Contacts & Support Services:

💜 Women's Shelter Service: Call 1800 811 811 ⚖️ Legal Aid: Visit Legal Aid Website 📞 Lifeline (24/7 Crisis Support): Call 13 11 14 👨‍👦 Mensline Australia: Call 1300 789 978 👧 Kids Help Line: Call 1800 551 800 🚨 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800 RESPECT): Call 1800 737 732 🖤 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1800 019 123

⏳ Episode Timeline:

00:00 Introduction to Economic Abuse

00:24 Recognizing the Signs of Economic Abuse

01:09 Trigger Warning and Support Resources

01:57 Understanding Economic Abuse in Family Law

02:28 Examples of Economic Abuse

04:23 Subtle Forms of Financial Control

12:12 Post-Separation Financial Abuse

15:25 Questions to Identify Financial Abuse

21:30 Coercive Control and Financial Dependence

24:29 Understanding Coercive Control and Financial Abuse

25:34 Real-Life Examples of Financial Abuse

27:06 Legal Definitions and Changes in Family Law

30:37 Proving Financial Abuse in Court

32:03 Steps to Escape Financial Abuse

40:39 Support and Resources for Victims

42:53 Encouragement and Final Thoughts

Are You a Victim of FINANCIAL Abuse? Signs You Shouldn't Ignore & What the New Laws Might Mean for You

Think you know what divorce looks like in Australia? Think again. In this episode, we're busting some of the most common myths that trip people up emotionally, financially, and legally during separation and divorce. Whether you're at the start of your journey or knee-deep in negotiations, these misunderstandings could be holding you back or costing you big.

Join Laura and her mum, Lynette Galvin — a family lawyer with 35+ years of experience — as they unpack 13 myths they hear all the time, including ones that cause fear, confusion, and prevent people from getting what they're entitled to. From custody myths to super splitting, property settlement fears and bad legal advice — this episode is your reality check.

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE just a discussion about Australian Family Law and Divorce or DeFacto Separation.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If You:

✅ Are worried that leaving the house means losing it in the property split ❓ Think child support covers all expenses 💡 Believe the court always favours mothers in parenting cases 🛡 Are avoiding legal advice to "save money" 📚 Think you have to wait until your divorce is final to sort out property ⚖️ Are scared to date during separation because it might "hurt your case" 🧠 Just want to stop second-guessing everything your ex or their lawyer is telling you

📌 Links & Resources Mentioned:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/DatingPost40 📝 Dating After Divorce Survey – Help us shape resources for separated parents:

🎧 Related Episodes:

• Equalising Super: Is It Fair or a Financial Trap? Not yet released

• Is It Emotional Abuse? Recognising Coercive Control https://youtu.be/PHfhLZXlUc8?si=l2U3B8hOKhKlr2v-

• How to Prepare for Mediation Like a Pro https://youtu.be/JYqqDyWa5ns?si=IEdr3tdQnF4fLMnE

💻 Search Our Full Podcast Library – https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

⚠️ Emergency Contacts & Support Services:

💜 Women's Shelter Service: Call 1800 811 811 ⚖️ Legal Aid: Visit Legal Aid Website 📞 Lifeline (24/7 Crisis Support): Call 13 11 14 👨‍👦 Mensline Australia: Call 1300 789 978 👧 Kids Help Line: Call 1800 551 800 🚨 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800 RESPECT): Call 1800 737 732 🖤 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1800 019 123

💬 Final Thoughts:

No matter where you're at in your divorce journey, understanding the truth behind these myths can empower you to make better decisions and avoid costly mistakes. Don't let fear, bad advice, or outdated beliefs hold you back.

👉 Hit play now and take the guesswork out of your separation. 🎧

⏳ Episode Timeline:

00:00 Introduction to Divorce Myths

01:38 Myth 1: Property Settlement Timing for Divorce in Australia

02:42 Myth 2: Do Family Courts Favour Mothers for Custody

04:33 Myth 3: Ownership and Coercive Control in Divorce

06:38 Myth 4: Equalizing Superannuation in Divorce

07:45 Myth 5: Dating After Separation can it affect your divorce or custody?

10:19 Myth 6: Can you Settle Divorce Without Court

11:58 Myth 7: Leaving the House and Kids during divorce

16:47 Myth 8: Not getting legal Advice Saves Money in Divorce

19:08 Myth 9: Property Settlements Are always 50/50

22:45 Myth 10: Child Support Covers All Expenses

24:07 Myth 11: Do Family Lawyers Know Everything

30:20 Conclusion and Resources

Divorce Myths That Could Cost You – Debunked! Episode 189

💰 Is your ex hiding assets? Are they draining joint accounts, concealing super, or transferring money to family and friends? You're not alone, and there are legal ways to uncover what's yours. Learn about the most common ways people try to hide assets in divorce, including trust funds, cash jobs, disappearing assets, and hidden overseas accounts. Find out how the Australian Family Court courts handle these cases, what legal tools you can use to track down missing assets, and what to consider doing before mediation or family court. If you're frustrated by a lack of financial disclosure or suspect your ex is hiding money, this episode is a must-listen. 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast provides general legal education for Australia and is not a substitute for independent legal advice. Always consult a qualified lawyer for guidance tailored to your situation. 🎧 Listen to This Episode If You: ✅ Believe your ex is hiding assets or not fully disclosing their financial situation ❓ Have noticed money disappearing from joint accounts 💡 Suspect your ex is hiding superannuation, cash jobs, or business earnings 🛡 Want to know what legal steps you can take before mediation or court 📚 Wondering how courts handle trusts, business assets, or overseas properties ⚖️ Are frustrated with non-disclosure and want to know what the courts will do about it Key Topics Discussed in This Episode: 1️⃣ Draining Joint Accounts: Can You Get the Money Back? 2️⃣ Superannuation & Hidden Retirement Funds 3️⃣ Trust Funds, Businesses & Company-Owned Assets 4️⃣ Cash Jobs & Undeclared Income 5️⃣ Selling Assets for Cheap to Friends & Family 6️⃣ Disappearing Assets: What If They Just Vanish? 7️⃣ Hiding Money & Property Overseas 8️⃣ What If Your Ex Refuses to Do Financial Disclosure?

📌 Links & Resources Mentioned in This Episode: 📜 Superannuation Information Request (Form 6) – ATO Superannuation Search 📜 Family Court Superannuation Search via Comm Courts Portal – Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia 📜 📜Disclosure Checklist - https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosurechecklist

🎙 More Podcast Episodes You'll Love:

• Untangling Valuations: How to Find Out What Assets Are Worth https://youtu.be/pkNKwBXMu9I?si=Lq2Q0UvXh_AVHcJH
• DIY Disclosure: What to Do If Your Ex Won't Provide Financial Records https://youtu.be/c273nHUN9DE?si=nshmPtJwqkdk8hAO
• Avoiding Traps: Why You Should Never Negotiate Percentages Before Knowing the Property Pool https://youtu.be/D8xj-52q9ZE?si=N_-NKmXlszdXa-Rb

⏳ Episode Timeline:

00:00 Introduction: Uncovering Hidden Assets in Divorce

00:14 Common Tactics for Hiding Assets

01:40 Legal Rights and Draining Joint Accounts

04:29 Superannuation and Hidden Funds

06:55 Trust Funds and Corporate Veils

08:41 Valuing Businesses in Divorce

12:25 Cash in Hand and Undeclared Income

15:21 Selling Assets to Friends

16:04 Burnt Leg and Old Cars

16:27 Valuing and Insuring Classic Cars

17:01 Court's Approach to Asset Distribution

18:57 Handling Disappearing Assets

19:48 Hiding Assets Overseas

22:37 Non-Disclosure Issues

28:04 Child Support and Hidden Assets

29:32 Final Thoughts and Legal Advice

Emergency Contacts: 💜 Women's Shelter Service: Call 1800 811 811 ⚖️ Legal Aid: Visit Legal Aid Website 📞 Lifeline (24/7 Crisis Support): Call 13 11 14 👨‍👦 Mensline Australia: Call 1300 789 978 for confidential support for men 👧 Kids Help Line: Call 1800 551 800 for young people needing help 🚨 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800 RESPECT): Call 1800 737 732 🖤 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1800 019 123

Explore the tactics abusive partners use to maintain control, how emotional abuse can impact divorce and custody proceedings, and—most importantly—how to protect yourself, rebuild your confidence, and move forward with clarity.

When emotional abuse in your relationship or divorce, it becomes confusing, isolating, and overwhelming. Many people don't realize that abuse isn't always physical—disrespect, manipulation, and control can be just as damaging, especially during separation.

In this episode, we're joined by Krasi Kirova, a clinical psychologist specializing in complex trauma, emotional and psychological abuse, and family violence. With extensive experience in trauma-informed approaches, Krasi helps us break down the Three Ds of Emotional Abuse—Disrespect, Disempowerment, and Distortion—and how these behaviors can show up in divorce.

🚨 Trigger Warning: This episode discusses emotional and psychological abuse, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you need support, please reach out to 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) for confidential advice and assistance.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If You:

✔️ Feel like your voice was never heard during your marriage or separation ✔️ Have experienced gaslighting, manipulation, or financial control in your relationship ✔️ Are struggling to explain emotional abuse to your lawyer or the court ✔️ Want to understand how emotional abuse impacts divorce and child custody ✔️ Need tools and strategies to protect yourself during and after separation ✔️ Are curious about the new coercive control laws and how they affect family law cases

Legal Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. We are not psychologists or legal professionals, and the information shared is based on personal experiences and general knowledge. Every situation is unique, and laws vary by jurisdiction. If you are going through a divorce, custody dispute, or financial settlement, please seek independent legal advice from a qualified family law professional.

Episode Breakdown:

00:00 Introduction to Emotional Abuse in Divorce

00:35 Meet Krausey Kirova: Expert in Emotional Abuse

02:31 Understanding Emotional Abuse: The Basics

08:34 The 3 D's of Emotional Abuse

09:40 Disrespect: The First Pillar of Emotional Abuse

15:42 Disempowerment: The Second Pillar of Emotional Abuse

21:37 Addressing Hidden Abuse

21:48 Free Resources for Divorce Preparation

22:33 Understanding Distortion in Abusive Relationships

23:48 The Impact of Gaslighting

25:42 Recognizing and Documenting Abusive Patterns

33:47 The Role of Therapy and Mediation

37:40 Workshops and Support for Women

38:38 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Episode Highlights: 🔹 [04:00] – What is emotional abuse, and how does it differ from disagreements or bad behavior? 🔹 [10:00] – The Three Ds of Emotional Abuse:

• Disrespect – Verbal put-downs, silent treatments, invalidation of your feelings.

• Disempowerment – Financial control, isolation, and decision-making without your input.

• Distortion – Gaslighting, blame-shifting, and rewriting reality. 🔹 [27:00] – Why emotional abuse is often hard to recognize when you're in it. 🔹 [31:00] – How to document abuse effectively for legal cases and communicate it to your lawyer. 🔹 [36:00] – Should you try family therapy or mediation with an emotionally abusive partner? 🔹 [40:00] – The impact of new coercive control laws in Australia and how they apply to divorce.

Links & Resources Mentioned: Resources & Support:

✅ Krasi Kirova's "Understanding Emotional Abuse in Relationships" Workshop –

Krasi Kirova is a clinical psychologist specialising in complex trauma, difficult family dynamics, emotional and psychological abuse in relationships, dealing/separating from a narcissistic partner, and setting healthy boundaries. She has extensive training in trauma-informed approaches and family violence. Aside from her work in private practice, Krasi has worked at Monash University's health services and co-facilitated trauma groups in a psychiatric hospital. She currently runs a workshop for women called "Understanding Emotional Abuse in Relationships".

https://kirovapsychology.com.au/workshop/

✅ 1800 RESPECT – Confidential support for domestic & family violence: https://www.1800respect.org.au ✅ Mediation Checklist – www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

✅ Legal Resources on Coercive Control – https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/fv/overview

Recommended Books:

📚 Why Does He Do That? – Lundy Bancroft 📖 Amazon | Booktopia (AU)

📚 The Verbally Abusive Relationship – Patricia Evans 📖 Amazon | Book Depository

📚 In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People – George K. Simon 📖 Amazon | Book Depository

Related Podcast Episodes:

🎙 Gaslighting in Divorce: How to Spot It & Shut It Down – (Do you have a link for this episode? I can add it!) 🎙 Coercive Control & The Family Court: What You Need to Know – https://youtu.be/OKJB6BY1N-M?si=hvZXb9-n-4qEgMbf

🎙 Mediation or Manipulation https://youtu.be/-7emsMbzX5o?si=6cOLhB8lZxGS8ZQa

🔗 Support Services

• Lifeline – 13 11 14 (Australia)

• 1-800-RESPECT – Domestic Violence Support

👉 If you found this episode helpful, don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need this information.

#DivorceSupport #CovertNarcissist #FamilyLaw #NarcissisticAbuse #Separation #LegalTips #CustodyBattles #PropertySettlement #ToxicRelationships #Manipulation #CourtOrders

Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need it!

Legal Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. We are not psychologists or legal professionals, and the information shared is based on personal experiences and general knowledge. Every situation is unique, and laws vary by jurisdiction. If you are going through a divorce, custody dispute, or financial settlement, please seek independent legal advice from a qualified family law professional.

Have you just realized your ex might be a covert narcissist? Thought your separation was amicable,only to find yourself blindsided by manipulation and deceit? In this episode, we break down the six key signs of a covert narcissist during divorce, property settlement or coparenting. From playing the victim to using the legal system against you, we'll help you spot the red flags and protect yourself.

Listen to This Episode If You:

✅ Are going through a divorce or property settlement and feel like something is off. ❓ Want to understand the subtle tactics of a covert narcissist. 💰 Need to protect your financial assets from manipulation. ⚖️ Are dealing with custody battles and want to safeguard your children. 📜 Suspect your ex is using legal loopholes to control or deceive you.

Legal Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. We are not psychologists or legal professionals, and the information shared is based on personal experiences and general knowledge. Every situation is unique, and laws vary by jurisdiction. If you are going through a divorce, custody dispute, or financial settlement, please seek independent legal advice from a qualified family law professional.

Episode Breakdown:

00:00 Introduction to Covert Narcissism in Divorce

01:23 Understanding Covert Narcissists

02:31 Recognizing the Victim Role

05:24 Manipulation Tactics in Divorce

13:26 Custody Battles and Child Manipulation

17:53 Legal Manipulation and Delays

20:03 Mediation Challenges with Narcissists

22:33 Legal Advice and Second Opinions

22:56 Mediation with a Covert Narcissist

23:10 Document Everything

23:49 Investigate Property Claims

24:07 Handling Unreasonable Negotiations

25:15 Free Resources for Mediation

28:02 False Allegations and Manipulation

35:37 Expecting Amicable Pretenses

42:06 Final Thoughts and Advice

Key Topics Discussed in This Episode:

🔹 The Victim Role: How covert narcissists gain sympathy while making you feel like the problem. 🔹 Financial Manipulation: Hidden assets, delaying tactics, and emotional blackmail. 🔹 Custody Battles & Control: The sneaky ways they use your children against you. 🔹 Legal Abuse & False Allegations: How they use the court system to exhaust and intimidate you. 🔹 How to Protect Yourself: Strategies to recognize manipulation and safeguard your rights.

Links & Resources Mentioned:

🔗 Support Services

• Lifeline – 13 11 14 (Australia)

• 1-800-RESPECT – Domestic Violence Support

🎙 Recommended Episodes:

• The Narcissist Playbook in Divorce – Learn the tactics they use and how to counter them.https://youtu.be/OrRvd9XzuIg?si=KDYG1a0Fh8xXBn7q

• 8 Ways to Protect Yourself from DARVO – Recognize and defend against manipulation.https://youtu.be/pRMOfozwBKs?si=54TMNNtK_H5r2QGj

• Can You Mediate with a Narcissist? – Practical advice for handling negotiations. https://youtu.be/JYqqDyWa5ns?si=iY_J7pz-uA6ChOwc

👉 If you found this episode helpful, don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need this information.

#DivorceSupport #CovertNarcissist #FamilyLaw #NarcissisticAbuse #Separation #LegalTips #CustodyBattles #PropertySettlement #ToxicRelationships #Manipulation #CourtOrders

Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need it!

Legal Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. We are not psychologists or legal professionals, and the information shared is based on personal experiences and general knowledge. Every situation is unique, and laws vary by jurisdiction. If you are going through a divorce, custody dispute, or financial settlement, please seek independent legal advice from a qualified family law professional.

Are you going through a divorce property settlement and unsure whether to choose a Consent Order or a Binding Financial Agreement (BFA)? In this episode, we break down what they are and the key differences between the two. We also discuss the pitfalls and risks to keep in mind when navigating this.

Listen to This Episode If You:

✅ Are going through a separation and need to divide property fairly. ❓ Want to know whether a Consent Order or a Financial Agreement is the better choice. 💰 Need to understand the costs involved in each option. ⚖️ Want to protect yourself from future financial claims. 📜 Want to know if consent orders or bfa's can be contested in court

00:00 Introduction to Property Settlement

00:57 Understanding Consent Orders

01:32 Exploring Binding Financial Agreements (BFAs)

02:14 Comparing Consent Orders and BFAs

03:20 Legal Advice and Costs

05:28 Risks of Not Having Legal Agreements

12:41 Process of Getting Financial Agreements

15:33 Process of Getting Consent Orders

21:49 Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them

22:15 Understanding Consent Orders and Financial Agreements

22:46 The Risks of Non-Disclosure in Financial Agreements

25:44 Signing Under Pressure: What You Need to Know

27:55 The Importance of Proper Legal Advice

30:49 Challenging and Enforcing Settlements

35:49 Final Thoughts and Practical Advice

40:48 Conclusion and Legal Disclaimer

👉 If you found this episode helpful, don't

Key Topics Discussed in This Episode: 🔹 Understanding Consent Orders

• What is a Consent Order, and how does it work?

• Why the Family Court reviews and approves these agreements.

• The benefits of having a legally binding, court-approved settlement.

🔹 What You Need to Know About Financial Agreements (BFAs)

• Why they are no longer called Binding Financial Agreements.

• How BFAs differ from Consent Orders and why they carry more risk.

• The legal costs and technicalities involved in creating a Financial Agreement.

🔹 Consent Orders vs. BFAs: Cost and Legal Requirements

• How much does a Consent Order cost vs. a BFA?

• Why BFAs require independent legal advice for both parties.

• Can you challenge or overturn these agreements in court?

🔹 Avoiding Common Pitfalls

• Why informal agreements leave you legally unprotected.

• The dangers of signing under pressure or coercion.

• What happens if your ex doesn't comply with the agreement?

🔹 Finalizing Your Property Settlement

• A walkthrough for getting a Consent Order approved.

• When a BFA might be necessary and how to ensure it holds up in court.

• Questions to ask before signing any financial settlement.

Links & Resources Mentioned:

🔗 Free Resources & Guides:

• DIY Divorce Blueprint – Learn how to create your Consent Orders https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/enrol

• Legal Aid Resources https://www.legalaid.qld.gov.au/Home

🎙 Recommended Episodes:

• Do I Really Need a Consent Order? https://youtu.be/AJrX8ovEEY8?si=LOAfESvxibj_-VYz

• Protecting Yourself After Divorce: Financial & Legal Steps

• Spousal Maintenance: Am I Eligible? https://youtu.be/lafPlHTSWp0?si=aCXWrOmWyJqZN4Bc

Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need it!

Consent Orders or Binding Financial Agreements: How to Make Sure Your Settlement Sticks

#FamilyLaw #DivorceSettlement #PropertySettlement #ConsentOrder #FinancialAgreement #BFAvsConsentOrder #LegalAdvice #Separation #DivorceSupport #FamilyCourt #Prenup #DivorceLaw #LegalTips #CoParenting #RelationshipBreakdown #CourtOrders

Child Support Battles: What They Don't Tell You & How to Fight Back Are you struggling with child support? Whether you're battling a non-paying ex, dealing with inconsistent advice from child support agencies, or feeling overwhelmed by legal loopholes, you're not alone. In this episode, Crystal Padooch, founder of Child Support Consultants, reveals the five critical things every parent should know about child support. With 14 years of experience, Crystal explains how the system really works, the common tactics some parents use to avoid paying, and what steps you can take to protect yourself and your children's financial future. We also dive into the emotional side of child support, including the guilt many parents feel, the stress of dealing with financial abuse, and how to navigate the system without giving up. Disclaimer: This podcast provides general legal education and is not a substitute for independent legal advice. Always consult a qualified lawyer or child support consultant for guidance tailored to your situation. Listen to This Episode If You: ✅ Are struggling to get child support payments from your ex. ❓ Feel like you're getting different answers from child support agencies and don't know what to believe. 💡 Want to understand how child support assessments work and what your options are. 🛡 Are dealing with a financially abusive or manipulative ex who is trying to avoid paying. 📚 Need guidance on how to escalate complaints and fight back against unfair decisions. Key Topics Discussed in This Episode: 1️⃣ Understanding the Child Support Process

• The two main pathways: Child Support Agreements vs. Child Support Assessments
• How the child support formula works and what factors impact payments
• Why your ex's reported income may not reflect their actual earnings

2️⃣ Dealing with Inconsistent Advice from Child Support Agencies

• Why different case officers give conflicting information
• The best way to escalate your case and get clear answers
• How to document calls and complaints to protect yourself

3️⃣ Let Go of Child Support Guilt

• Why seeking child support is NOT about you—it's about your kids
• How child support ensures stability and financial security for your children
• Overcoming the stigma and online shaming around child support

4️⃣ How to Protect Yourself from Financial Abuse & Manipulation

• The common tactics used by coercive controllers and financial abusers
• What to do if your ex lowers their income or refuses to work to avoid payments
• Strategies to prove financial dishonesty and fight back

5️⃣ What to Do If Your Ex Refuses to Pay

• The enforcement actions child support agencies can take
• Why some loopholes allow people to dodge payments (and how they should be fixed!)
• Steps to take if you're owed child support but not receiving anything

Links & Resources Mentioned: 🔗 Child Support Consultants – Book a free clarity call with Crystal: https://childsupportconsultants.com.au/ 📚 Divorce Course Podcast – More episodes on navigating separation & co-parenting 📖 Government Child Support Information – https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/contact-child-support Emergency Contacts: 💜 Women's Shelter Service: Call 1800 811 811 ⚖️ Legal Aid: [Visit Legal Aid Website] 📞 Lifeline (24/7 Crisis Support): Call 13 11 14 👨‍👦 Mensline Australia: Call 1300 789 978 for confidential support for men 👧 Kids Help Line: Call 1800 551 800 for young people needing help 🚨 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800 RESPECT): Call 1800 737 732 🖤 Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1800 019 123

00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction

01:48 Understanding the Child Support Process

04:58 Dealing with Inconsistencies in Child Support Calls

10:13 Addressing Child Support Guilt

14:32 Avoiding Comparisons with Others' Stories

16:49 Handling Financially Abusive Ex-Partners

20:42 Navigating the Child Support Process

21:30 The Emotional Toll of Child Support Battles

21:57 Advocating for the Child's Best Interest

22:50 Legal Abuse and Court Involvement

23:09 DIY Divorce Blueprint

26:54 Challenges in Child Support Collection

29:26 System Loopholes and Legislative Issues

37:31 Support for Domestic Violence Victims

38:54 Final Thoughts and Contact Information

#ChildSupport #DivorceCoursePodcast #FamilyLaw #SingleParenting #CoParentingTips #FinancialAbuse #ChildSupportAwareness #ChildSupportHelp #DivorceSupport #CustodyBattle #CoParentingChallenges #ParentalRights #KnowYourRights #LegalHelp