The Self-Hype Podcast

What if the love story you’re waiting for starts with how you treat yourself on a bad Tuesday? In this first episode of Mini Episode Month, Eli takes a break from dating advice (and a very loud air fryer) to tackle the idea that your worth is tied to your relationship status. He explains why the goal isn’t becoming so self-sufficient that nobody can get in. Instead, it’s setting a standard of love for yourself: how you care for yourself when your schedule is crushing you, how you celebrate a promotion or a new PR, and how you back yourself when you set a boundary. Eli gets candid about building his coaching business out of fear and self-punishment, and the shift that finally made it sustainable. Tune in for a quick, no-fluff reminder that the person of your dreams can add to your life, but they can’t build it for you.

If you spent the entire new season of Love Is Blind screaming at your television, you are not alone. This week, Eli returns to the mic for a highly anticipated, wildly unfiltered deep dive into the latest mess of the pods. He breaks down why this season was simultaneously boring and incredibly telling, exposing the reality that "love" isn't blind—insecurity, desperation, and infatuation are. Eli roasts the "half-cooked chicken" maturity levels of the cast, explains why a guy who drops the F-bomb during a minor disagreement is showing you his true colors, and why staying out late kissing a stranger's bicep at your bachelorette party is not "wifey energy." Tune in for a hilarious, insightful masterclass on why you can't microwave a relationship, how to spot an F-boy in disguise, and why you need to see how a man handles conflict before you say "I do."

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If you’ve ever wanted to literally paint a picture of your trauma and stare it right in the face, this episode is for you. Eli brings on viral artist Shannon Lane, who took the internet by storm by literally painting the "demons" of depression and anxiety. Shannon gets incredibly raw about turning to a paintbrush when she couldn’t afford expensive therapy, how her viral "You Are Not Alone" project became a digital safe haven for thousands of grieving people, and why avoiding your dark feelings only makes them stronger. Tune in for a deeply emotional, hilarious, and inspiring conversation on why you need to stop outrunning your anxiety, how to set strict boundaries as an empath, and why giving yourself permission to make "rubbish" art might actually save your mental health.

About the Guest: Shannon Lane is a UK-based artist and digital creator known for her profoundly moving mental health paintings. After using art to navigate her own severe depression and anxiety, Shannon went massively viral for her "You Are Not Alone" project—a powerful visual representation of community solidarity against the "demons" of mental illness. She uses her growing platform to destigmatize mental health, share her journey with ADHD and anxiety, and encourage others to find healing through creative expression.

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Are you making a relationship your ultimate life goal just so a man can finally validate your existence? Eli is here to violently dismantle that mindset. Stepping away from the usual dating mechanics, Eli unpacks the heavy, terrifying reality of finding your actual life purpose. He shares his own journey of moving to Chicago, slowing down, and mourning the fact that he missed out on long-term love in his 20s because he was too busy chasing the dopamine high of industry success. This episode is the ultimate wake-up call to stop outsourcing your self-esteem, stop dating your fear of being alone, and realize you are already enough.

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If Shakira and Beyoncé can get cheated on, absolutely nobody is safe. In this highly requested return episode, Eli sits down with badass divorce attorney Michele Locke to rip the glamorous filter off of celebrity marriages. They go totally unfiltered on the delusions of the Hollywood elite—from J.Lo’s endless lack of accountability to Tom Brady treating his supermodel wife like an off-season hobby. Michele drops some heavy truths about the damage of parental alienation in the Brangelina split and explains exactly why narcissists flock to the limelight. Tune in for a wildly entertaining masterclass on why celebrity relationship drama is exactly like regular toxic dating, just with a bigger yacht and a PR team.

About the Guest: Michele Locke is a seasoned family law and divorce attorney, digital creator, and the host of the Love, Lust, Law podcast. With years of experience battling it out in the courtroom, Michele brings a sharp legal and psychological perspective to modern dating, marriage, and messy high-profile breakups. When she isn't breaking down the rampant personality disorders of Hollywood's elite, she’s empowering everyday people to navigate the realities of love and the legal system.

Follow Michele: @attorneymichelelocke

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Grab your notebook ya’ll. In this highly requested community Q&A episode, Eli battles through a nasty sinus infection to deliver the ultimate intervention for your anxious attachment. He holds nothing back as he roasts the delusion of waiting for a guy who literally told you he belongs to the streets, breaks down why you need to stop mistaking a panic attack for "the spark," and explains why healthy love feels more like Baked Lays than Flamin' Hot Cheetos. If you’re constantly spiraling over unreturned texts, missing a toxic ex just because you're lonely, or wondering why you keep attracting avoidants, this episode is your wake-up call to stop dating your own fear.

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Are you exhausted by Instagram trainers promising you'll drop 30 pounds in 30 days if you just "grind harder"? In this unfiltered guest episode, Eli sits down with his own personal trainer, Ambrose, to expose the absolute BS of the modern fitness industry. Ambrose breaks down why he walked away from a six-figure tech job at Meta to become a trainer who actually gives a damn about your mental health. They dive deep into the real reasons you aren't seeing results—unpacking how stress, binge eating, and a society designed to keep you sedentary are secretly sabotaging your goals. From redefining what it means to track your habits to realizing why your late-night Uber Eats habit is just a coping mechanism for your anxiety, this episode is a massive reality check. Get ready to stop beating yourself up over the scale and finally learn the mental shifts required to build a body (and a life) you actually love.

Get 15% Off All Ambrose Coaching Services w/ Promo Code SelfHype15 

Follow And Learn More: @bodybyambrose // https://bio.to/bodybyambrose

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In this highly requested solo episode, Eli takes a hilarious, unfiltered deep dive into why romantic comedies are secretly ruining our dating lives. Calling out everything from Notting Hill to cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies, Eli breaks down why we are all addicted to the "spark" and delusional fairy tales. He roasts your favorite cinematic heroines for emotionally cheating on their perfectly fine, hardworking fiancés just to run off with some guy who bakes gingerbread in a small town. Eli unpacks the bizarre lack of actual communication in these films, why "big romantic gestures" are usually just massive red flags for selfish behavior, and why real, sustainable love is about building a safe support system, not chasing a manufactured high. Get ready to laugh, feel incredibly called out, and finally unlearn the toxic relationship porn that Hollywood sold you.

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If you’re currently sobbing over someone who abruptly decided to walk away, this episode is a massive, warm hug for your nervous system. Eli sits down with poet and bestselling author Cailin Hargreaves (whose viral words probably saved you at 3 AM) to talk about the brutal, unfiltered reality of sudden heartbreak. Cailin gets incredibly vulnerable about her own current separation, breaking down the literal physiological shock and trauma of experiencing an avoidant discard. They unpack why you absolutely cannot force yourself to "heal" in the middle of a storm, how childhood trauma shapes our coping mechanisms, and why your body is just trying to protect you. Tune in to learn why you need to stop aggressively rushing your healing process, how to find meaning in your absolute deepest pain, and why getting left behind is sometimes the exact catalyst you need to meet the most evolved version of yourself.

About the Guest: Cailin Hargreaves is a London-based poet, digital creator, and author of the poetry collections Be the Light and Glimmers. After surviving a life-altering autoimmune diagnosis and sudden hearing loss at age 10, Cailin turned to writing as a survival tool to process her trauma and find the light in the darkness. Today, she uses her massive platform to create a safe, comforting corner of the internet for anyone navigating grief, chronic illness, and heartbreak. She is currently working on her debut memoir.

Follow Cailin: @cayswords_

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Why does someone seem to move on so quickly after a breakup, especially when you’re still trying to pick up the pieces?

In this deeply personal episode of The Self Hype Podcast, Eli Vazquez shares his own experience as a former avoidant who entered a rebound relationship while still emotionally raw from heartbreak. He opens up about the fear, loneliness, need for validation, childhood wounds, and emotional patterns that can make a new connection feel intoxicating before the old relationship has truly been processed.

Eli also reflects on how avoidant attachment affected his relationships, why forgiveness without communication isn’t enough, and how his biggest dating mistakes ultimately forced him to confront the parts of himself he needed to change.

Most importantly, this episode isn’t about obsessing over why your ex chose someone else. It’s about understanding that their next relationship is not a measurement of your worth, taking the lessons from what happened, and using heartbreak as an opportunity to become a healthier version of yourself.

Sometimes moving on isn’t about finding someone better. Sometimes it’s about running from feelings you haven’t learned how to face.

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