Today on SelfWork, we’re going to be looking at research asking the question is suicide predictable. There is also controversy about whether or not it’s preventable – I recently had a mom whose daughter had accidentally overdosed tell me with tears in her eyes. “I can’t go there. I can’t believe that I could’ve predicted […]

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Welcome to SelfWork! I’m talking about self-control today… especially emotional self-control. We won’t touch on addictions, although they obviously have to do with emotional self-control. We’re talking about in the realm of communication how to maintain self-control when you’re angry, or taken aback, afraid or surprised. There’s a simple mantra that can be helpful — […]

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Today’s podcast identifies the one question that you can ask yourself before you take things too personally. I’ve heard lots of couples bicker and fight over the twenty-five years I’ve been a therapist, and this question will save you from so many assumptions and misunderstandings. I’ll use an example when I actually followed my own […]

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Today’s topic is perfectionism. I call it a disease in the title because it can cause not only emotional and psychological problems when it’s out of control, but the stress of perfectionism can lead to illness and even suicide. I talked with a phenomenal expert on perfectionism last week, Dr. Gordon Flett, and I’ll have some […]

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What do you do when you love someone who won’t get help for their depression or anxiety? This episode, sponsored by Audible.com, will focus on what my own research has found, and how we can talk about mental health treatment or therapy in a way that would make it far easier for men to consider. We’ll […]

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We’re going to be talking about healthy and not so healthy relationships today. Many relationships get their start with one person “saving” another. These are boundary-less relationship and they’re doomed for trouble. The victim gets tired of being the victim. The savior gets tired of not being appreciated for saving.  Mark Manson, a blogger with […]

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What is a family of choice? It’s a family you create with friends. Some of us don’t have families that we can count on in times of stress or need, or joy for that matter. Instead of staying bitter or lonely, I’ve come up with five “caveats” in finding people who would earn the right […]

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Social anxiety affects millions of Americans. Today I’m going to talk about how it may be affecting commitment, as well as how it’s affected by social media. When you get a FaceBook invitation or a “save the date” notice, do you automatically say, “It’s too much to think about,” or,  “I don’t know who else is going,” or even, “I […]

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We all hear about unconditional love, especially when talking about how parents feel about their children. However, unconditional love can be worn out — used up. Even though today’s podcast focuses on healthy, “good enough” parents and self-destructive and manipulative children, you can apply this to any relationship, so listen in!  (This dynamic can obviously […]

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I created a lot of chaos in my life by being attracted to “bad boys,” men who were not interested in my own growth as a person, and who acted as if women couldn’t be trusted and that love wasn’t possible. I, like many women before me, decided to try to change a mind or […]

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