Christmas and the holiday season can be a stressful time for many people. For some, it is as simple as fatigue after a busy year, while for others bigger emotional issues rise to the surface. Wellington psychologist Karen Nimmo has some coping strategies to share.

Christmas and the holiday season can be a stressful time for many people.

For some, it is as simple as fatigue after a busy year, while for others bigger emotional issues rise to the surface.

Wellington psychologist Karen Nimmo has some coping strategies to share.

Listen to the full interview with Karen Nimmo.

Nimmo tells Kathryn Ryan it doesn't help that when we get to the end of the year, we're all exhausted to begin with.

"When you finish work, there's still a mountain to climb before you actually get to Christmas Day. You're buying things, there's a lot of logistics.

"We're tired and when we're tired, that increases our emotional vulnerability to things going wrong. The next thing is financial stress. That's huge, we feel at this time of year that we're haemorrhaging money trying to keep everybody happy, so that puts a huge amount of pressure on people."

She says Christmas comes with expectations of togetherness and that can put pressure on people who might be alone or unhappy.

"I think most people understand there's an underbelly to Christmas that's not particularly tasteful, and that's the domestic violence statistics that go up, the drinking, the addiction problems. A lot of people are worrying and struggling at this time of year with mental health issues."

Nimmo says she's had clients that just avoid the day altogether to dodge the stress and pressure that comes with it. She says that, for many, Christmas is a day that reminds us of loss. For many it will be the first Christmas without a family member who may have passed away.

"And it goes on, it's not just the first Christmas, it's the second Christmas and then it sets up a negative view of the whole occasion which is quite understandable when you've been through that kind of thing.

"You can put on a bright face, but you can't force people to be jolly."

She says there are things you can do to make the day easier. For instance, structuring the day and planning the meal.

"But that doesn't stop people's personal feelings creeping in around the edges."

Nimmo says it can help to take some of the hype out of Christmas and remember it's just another day in the calendar. …

Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details