The Self-Driven Child

What Are They Thinking?: The Neuroscience of Nagging in Parents and Teens


Listen Later

If you've ever caught yourself reminding your kid—again and again—to get that homework done, check in with the coach, or finally read that book, this episode is for you. I dive deep into the psychology and brain science behind why we nag, how it impacts both our stress levels and our kids’ behavior, and what we can do instead to be more effective, compassionate, and calm.

I share a personal story from my own household (yes, I'm guilty too!) and explore what’s really going on in the minds of both the "nagger" and the "nag-ee." You’ll also hear a powerful example of how one family made a simple shift in communication—and had their best night in years. If you want to support your child in a way that actually works—and feels better for everyone—don’t miss this one.

 

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] - Introducing the workbook: The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child
[1:10] - My own struggle with nagging during my son’s senior year
[3:00] - Why we nag: the emotional drive behind our reminders
[4:35] - The illusion of control and the stress of unfinished tasks
[6:25] - Brain science: what happens in the mind of the nagger
[8:15] - What nagging does to kids’ brains—MRI findings from a key study
[9:55] - A story of a family overwhelmed by homework stress
[11:10] - A simple 3-step plan for changing the dynamic
[12:55] - The power of phrasing: how supportive language changes everything
[14:20] - Shifting from nagging to nurturing—and why it works
[15:41] - About PrepMatters and how we support students without added pressure 

 

Links & Resources:

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference.

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

The Self-Driven ChildBy Ned Johnson

  • 4.5
  • 4.5
  • 4.5
  • 4.5
  • 4.5

4.5

8 ratings


More shows like The Self-Driven Child

View all
ADHD Experts Podcast by ADDitude

ADHD Experts Podcast

1,327 Listeners

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled by JLML Press

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

3,673 Listeners

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children by Debbie Reber

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

963 Listeners

10% Happier with Dan Harris by 10% Happier

10% Happier with Dan Harris

12,700 Listeners

Calm Parenting Podcast by Kirk Martin

Calm Parenting Podcast

1,459 Listeners

Neurodiversity Podcast by Emily Kircher-Morris

Neurodiversity Podcast

417 Listeners

Future U Podcast - The Pulse of Higher Ed by Jeff Selingo, Michael Horn

Future U Podcast - The Pulse of Higher Ed

140 Listeners

The Simplicity Parenting Podcast with Kim John Payne by Kim John Payne/Center for Social Sustainability

The Simplicity Parenting Podcast with Kim John Payne

327 Listeners

Raising Good Humans by Dear Media, Aliza Pressman

Raising Good Humans

1,896 Listeners

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos by Pushkin Industries

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

14,283 Listeners

Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry by Lynn Lyons LICSW, Robin Hutson

Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry

461 Listeners

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens by Dr. Lisa Damour/Reena Ninan

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

74 Listeners

Good Inside with Dr. Becky by Dr. Becky Kennedy

Good Inside with Dr. Becky

4,489 Listeners

This Is So Awkward by Peoples Media, This Is So Awkward

This Is So Awkward

325 Listeners

Parenting teenagers untangled. 🏆 Your Weekly Hug by Rachel Richards

Parenting teenagers untangled. 🏆 Your Weekly Hug

23 Listeners