Sex, Love, and Addiction

What Is Trauma, Really? And How Is It Related to Addiction?


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Lynne Friedman-gell and Dr. Joanne Barron are both the Founders of Trauma and Beyond Center, based in Los Angeles. They provide outpatient trauma programs for trauma, mental health, and co-existing disorders. They have written a book, Intergenerational Trauma Workbook, to help people ask reflective questions that allow them to go deeper to heal some of their trauma. In this episode, Lynne and Dr. Joanne go deeper on the impacts trauma really has, how it shows up in addiction, and so much more. 

 

TAKEAWAYS:

[2:55] Why did Lynne and Dr. Joanne start a trauma center? 

[5:50] How do you define trauma? 

[8:40] Our first relationships set up a template of what we’re going to expect in the world. 

[10:40] Dr. Rob has seen a lot of trauma survivors who have taken on addiction as a way to cope with their past. 

[11:40] One of the best defense mechanisms a child has is to numb themselves and disassociate from their feelings.

[13:10] Children end up blaming themselves, instead of their parents. They feel like they’re responsible for ‘all the bad things’ happening to them. 

[14:10] What type of therapists should trauma survivors be looking for? 

[16:35] How can people heal their past when they don’t even remember? 

[21:30] Whenever we are dealing with pain, it compounds because we use the past as a reference. 

[27:20] We unconsciously match with other people who have similar attributes to our own dysfunctional families.

[30:35] Lynne and Dr. Joanne talk about their book, Intergenerational Trauma Workbook. 

[33:10] If we have unprocessed trauma, we will unknowingly pass it on to our children. 

[37:10] We all make mistakes and learning how to apologize, forgive, and recover from those mistakes is an important part of life. 

 

RESOURCES:

Sex and Relationship Healing

@RobWeissMSW

Sex Addiction 101 

Seeking Integrity

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men 

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency

Traumaandbeyondcenter.com

Drjoannebarron.com

Recoverypsychology.com

Intergenerational Trauma Workbook by Lynne Friedman-gell and Dr. Joanne Barron

 

QUOTES:

  • “So many clients suffer from developmental trauma and they don’t even know it, and there’s no place for them to go.”
  • “Our earliest relationships set up a template of what we’re going to expect in the world. We develop a tolerance for [bad] behavior and see it as love.”
  • “As you get older, the way you respond to life and the problems you have, are causing more and more pain.”
  • ...more
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    Sex, Love, and AddictionBy Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW

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