Where Do We Go From Here?

Listener Julie joins us to talk about the fear of making mistakes and how it crippled her for years. You'll find yourself in the broad themes of her story as someone who had to take on Purity Culture, the prosperity gospel, and her own pride. It moved her from passive princess to the strong, single woman she is today.

Partner with us for $3/month to hear this month's romcom recap, "500 Days of Summer." You also get special guest episodes and a ticket to the Green Room.

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If you've been eyeing a summer bikini and hoping no one from church sees you, this might be your episode. Most of us had a parent or pastor telling us what to wear before we ever heard about premarital sex. The "modesty" conversation embedded itself into Purity Culture dictating the length of shorts, width of straps, and what kind of swimsuit was ok. We go through the problems with how modesty was taught and end with What Do We Wear From Here? We talk about ethical fashion, the context for our clothes, what's developmentally appropriate, and so much more.

AND!!! Dr. Celeste Holbrook joins us as our first contributor for a monthly segment answering YOUR questions about sex. Listen up for the inaugural q & a at the end of this episode. Connect with Dr. Celeste on Facebook and Instagram.

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Partner with us for $3/month and listen to July's new romcom recap: 500 Days of Summer! Plus you get to hear uncut episodes from Dr. Kristin Kobes Du Mez, Dr. Michael Bird, and so many more (and a ticket to The Green Room).

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We've got a BIG episode for you to finish out June 2021. Listener and book club member Steph joins us to share her where do we go from here? story. From conservative evangelical culture in the mid west of the United States to the discovery that she's queer, Steph's insight about life as a queer Christian and what being part of a church community has meant to her will encourage you.

As a special gift to you from our show, we've unlocked our Partner-only episode with Bridget Eileen Rivera so that all of you can listen to it in Patreon.

Get a ticket to the Green Room! We meet on zoom at 9pm EST on Thursday June 24 (11am Melbourne time, June 25). It's the perfect place to meet others on a similar journey, ask questions, discuss and grow.

Jess and Devi also start this episode off with a conversation about last week's hot topic: the song "Modest is Hottest." Is this a 2021 expression of Purity Culture? Should we give it any oxygen? What is real satire? We talk about it, and issue a challenge for you. Compose a song satirizing modest culture - real satire! - record yourself performing it, put it on social media and tag us. We'd love to feature your work on the show if it's quality.

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One of Purity Culture's origin stories is the birth of the militaristic masculine tradition inside white American evangelicalism. It is a story clearly told and meticulously documented by Professor Kristin Kobes Du Mez in her singular book, Jesus and John Wayne. Pioneered by men like James Dobson then continued more recently by John Eldredge and Mark Driscoll, this movement sought to define the nuclear family as the most important unit worthy of the protection of a strong father figure. But what of the generation of men who read Wild at Heart, attended boot camps, and grew up believing they didn't fit the evangelical picture of masculinity? Their experience of reading this book is told throughout the episode as Professor Du Mez explains where the movement came from and how it shaped the fractured evangelicalism we see today.

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Partner with us for $3/month to hear Professor Du Mez's talk to us about the untold stories around Billy Graham, James Dobson, and Mark Driscoll.

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Kristin Kobes Du Mez is Professor of History and Gender Studies at Calvin University. She holds a PhD from the University of Notre Dame and her research focuses on the intersection of gender, religion, and politics. She has written for the New York Times, Washington Post, NBC News, and Religion News Service, and has been interviewed on NPR, CBS, and the BBC, among other outlets. Her most recent book is Jesus and John Wayne: How White Evangelicals Corrupted a Faith and Fractured a Nation. Connect with Kristin on Twitter

Move over Christian sex books, there's a rescue at hand. Sheila Wray Gregoire and her co-writers surveyed 20,000 Christian women, and what they found is shocking. If reading Love & Respect, the Act of Marriage, and others harmed you and your marriage, this is the episode for you. There is a way out of shame and obligation sex.

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Partner with us for $3/month to hear our recap of Miss Congeniality and get a ticket to this month's Green Room.

Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Sheila Wray Gregoire is passionate about changing the evangelical conversation about sex! A popular speaker, marriage blogger, and award-winning author of nine books, including The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex, and her latest book, The Great Sex Rescue, she wants to challenge Christians to go beyond pat answers on marriage to reach real intimacy. Sheila believes in authenticity, and gives real solutions to the very real and messy problems women, and couples, can face. Connect with Sheila on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

Most of us who left Purity Culture know that there were two pieces of advice for successful relationships: Don't date a non Christian and don't have premarital sex. Ready for more? We tackle Christians dating non Christians today with data, practical truths and myths as well as your tender, truthful stories.

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Partner with us to hear this month's movie recap: Miss Congeniality! Does this hit from 2000 hold up in 2021? Sandra Bullock plus beauty pageant gave Jess & Devi lots to talk about.

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Morgan Strehlow joins us to tell her Purity Culture story. The church taught her how to be a good girl and expected her to lead, but left her without the tools she needed to deal with growing up. With vulnerability Morgan tells us about the impact of purity culture and how she internalized the obligation sex message and what she's doing to move forward.

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Want a ticket to The Green Room so you can chat with Jess & Devi and other members of the community? On May 27 (28 in Australia) we are having our first monthly zoom call for Partners of the Show. Sign up by the 27th to join this month's call.

We've all heard "The Bible clearly says" from pastors and people we know, so how do we get better at understanding biblical texts? Theology professor and academic dean Dr. Michael Bird joins us to look at the three big mistakes we make when we read our Bibles. Yes we look at historical context and reading our present moment into an ancient document, but we also talk about pragmatic and ideal ethics. There's so much good stuff in here to equip you to be a better student of the Bible.

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Partner with us for $3/month to hear a bonus episode with Michael Bird going through three New Testament texts: 1 Corinthians 11:2-12, Romans 16:1-7, and 1 Timothy 2:11-14.

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Michael Bird is Academic Dean and Lecturer in Theology at Ridley College in Melbourne, Australia. He is an Anglican priest, author of more than 30 books on biblical and theological studies, including The New Testament in its World co-authored with N.T. Wright, he enjoys tennis, and hating coffee. He is married to Naomi and together they have four children. Follow Mike on Twitter @mbird13

Consent is a big word that's been in the news for the past few years, and when New South Wales Police Commissioner Mick Fuller suggested an app to regulate consent for the purpose of reducing assaults, we knew it was time for THE TALK. What is informed, enthusiastic consent? Why is it crucial for evangelicals to engage with this topic even with abstinence teaching? What does agency look like for women in relationships? This is the big talk about consent.

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Partner with us for $3/month to hear uncut interviews, romcom debriefs and a to get a ticket to The Green Room, a live chat with Jess & Devi.

Want a movie that simultaneously makes you think about revenge and forgiveness, sex and consent, men and women AND romcoms? "Promising Young Woman" is director/writer Emerald Fennel's Oscar-winning movie, and you guys. We have BIG THOUGHTS about what it has to say to us today. Jess & Devi talk through the major plot points, tracking Cassie's choices in light of purity culture and the what the broader culture around us says about men, women, sex and consent.

(Warning: episode contains tons of spoilers) Our thanks to Viviana Ortiz who created the episode artwork and allowed us to use it. Follow her: @vivs_studio

Bonus - go to the show notes for a free movie discussion guide

Partner with us for $3/month to receive bonus episodes and a ticket to the Green Room (a monthly zoom chat with us and other partners)

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