Description:

KC Davis is a licensed professional counselor, an author, a speaker, and, frankly, one of the most compassionate, funny, down-to-earth voices out there. During the pandemic, she created an amazing platform called Struggle Care where she has been teaching us how to care for ourselves (and our homes) without stigma or shame. Like—if the laundry’s piled up or the dishes aren’t done, it doesn’t mean you’re lazy or broken. It just means you’re living life. It’s a gracious approach to self-care that we wildly embrace. 

KC’s first book, How to Keep House While Drowning, was a total game-changer for so many women  who’ve felt overwhelmed by the everyday—and now she’s back with a brand new book called Who Deserves Your Love, helping us figure out which relationships we want to invest in, which ones need boundaries, and maybe even which ones we need to step away from. 

This conversation goes to some deep places. We talk about:

What mistreatment looks like in relationships, as opposed to abuse

The stories that we tell ourselves about another person’s behavior when we get caught up in the vulnerability cycle

What it means to be morally neutral

How to use a relationship decision tree to evaluate and make decisions about a relationship

And the sticky secret to enforcing boundaries

With accessibility, humorous relatability, and vulnerability,  KC is here to help us navigate the messy, complicated work of loving people and loving ourselves.

Thought-provoking Quotes:

“Sometimes my publishers will give me some advice like, ‘Let’s project that you’re a credible expert’, meanwhile I’m shooting TikToks from the toilet.” – KC Davis

“Despite being a therapist, I did not realize that I had severe postpartum depression because I didn't feel sad.” KC Davis

“Messiness is not a moral failing. Either your messiness is just a part of your personality and it's pretty functional for you and you don't need to change anything and accept yourself or maybe it's because you're having a hard time.” – KC Davis

“No one has ever shamed themselves into better mental health.” – KC Davis

“Self-care is not the thing you do to make yourself not struggle. It is learning how to take care of yourself while you struggle.” – KC Davis

Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

Who Deserves Your Love: How to Create Boundaries to Start, Strengthen, or End Any Relationship by KC Davis - https://amzn.to/3GVFdfh

How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis - https://amzn.to/43dAn4n

KC Davis Resources - https://www.strugglecare.com/resources

KC Davis TED Talk - How To Do Laundry When You’re Depressed - https://www.ted.com/talks/kc_davis_how_to_do_laundry_when_you_re_depressed_apr_2022

Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Styles - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas%E2%80%93Kilmann_Conflict_Mode_Instrument

Struggle Care - https://www.strugglecare.com/

Guest’s Links:

Website - https://www.strugglecare.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/strugglecare

Twitter - https://x.com/KCDavisSays

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/StruggleCare/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@domesticblisters

Podcast - https://www.strugglecare.com/struggle-care

Connect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/

Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmakerJen’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/

Jen’s Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmakerJen’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmaker

The For the Love Podcast is presented by Audacy. 

To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices