We all know the feeling. We start speaking to or dating someone and we begin to get excited about them . . . but then as soon as we show interest, they start to pull away. This can be painful and demoralizing. But why does this happen? Is it them, or is it us?

In this episode, Stephen and I break down a number of “them” and “us” scenarios. For instance:

• Some people loathe themselves so much that they devalue anyone who starts to see value in them.

• Others might have an obsession with attainment, and once they “get” you, they just move on to their next quest.

Thankfully, in these examples, you want to scare off a person like that. But sometimes our actions may inadvertently scare them off. For example: when they see us valuing them more than we should, especially given the stage of the relationship we’re currently in.

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