With and For hosted by Dr. Pam King

By Dr. Pam KingReligion & Spirituality Education Self-Improvement

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With and For hosted by Dr. Pam King episodes

September 09, 2024The Six Facets of Spiritual Health with Pam King & Dan Koch (You Have Permission)
Pam King joins licensed therapist Dan Koch on his podcast, You Have Permission, for a discussion of the six facets of spiritual health.
Show Notes
Subscribe to Dan Koch’s podcast, You Have Permission and his Patreon at patreon.com/dankoch

Pam’s research interests: positive developmental psychology and theology

How do psychologists perceive religion, spirituality, and theology?

How does spirituality and religion factor in human development?

William Damon (Stanford University) on moral development in the wake of the Columbine shooting

“My work has really focused on how do we offer people insight into the psychological benefits available in spirituality and religion at their best.”

Youth group

“What's the question I could ask that would get her thinking about the potentially harmful theology?”

Purity culture at youth group

The Thrive Center’s rubric of Six Facets of Spiritual Health

What are the six facets of spiritual health?
Contemplative neuroscience

Fight, flight, freeze

Built in rhythms of work and rest

Sabbath

Ancient rhythms and practical wisdom that give us permission to rest

Listen to Pam and Dan discuss facets of “Relationships and community” and “Identity and narrative” in the Patron-only second half of the conversation, available via patreon.com/dankoch
Contemplative practices

How to make changing diapers a spiritual practice: “Oh, we got a pooper!”

Directionality to narrative

Ethics and virtues.

Ethics as “real-world application to moral thinking.”

Virtues as “building up certain regular capacities in ourselves such that we will naturally make good ethical choices.”

Intercessory prayer and loving-kindness meditation

How youth approach morality in the context of community and family

About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.

Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter

Follow us on X @thrivecenter

Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King

Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook

Operations Manager: Lauren Kim

Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
53 min
June 10, 2024A Practice: Dr. Cynthia Eriksson Body Scan for Awareness
Close your eyes, press your feet into the floor, notice your bottom in your seat, feel your lower back in the chair.
Notice other sensations in the body and any tension in various places.
Notice the movement of your chest.
Starting at the top of the head and moving through each area of your body - paying attention to any sensations, energy, numbness, cold, hot, slowly moving your attention, noting the sensations.
Notice and accept what is in your body.
Bring attention back to the feeling of the body in your seat.
Allow awareness to return to any sounds and the space around you.
Open your eyes.
S1:E9 Responding to Trauma: Psychological Tools for Resilience and Recovery with Dr. Cynthia Eriksson. Here Dr. Eriksson guides you through a body scan to identify places of tension and discomfort in order to access and identify complicated emotions you might be experiencing.
About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
Follow us on X @thrivecenter
Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter
About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King
Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
7 min
June 03, 2024A Practice: Dr. Lisa Miller on Closing Doors so Others Can Open
Invite a time when you really wanted something - a job, a person to say, “yes,” or an acceptance letter.
Imagine that you grabbed the handle of the red door and it was stuck. You kicked the door because it was stuck. You were prepared to go through it but couldn’t,
You shifted 180 degrees because it was stuck - and saw a yellow door, wide open.
You crossed over to an opportunity that was open and good.
On the other side there was someone who was more right for you, or you got into a better school program, or got a better job - better for you than you had wanted.
When you think about the time of the stuck red door and the hairpin turn to the yellow door - was there anyone there who was your guide encouraging your turn?
This is a trail angel who guided you to a hairpin turn.
How are these moments formed, or are some of the most important parts of our lives guided in some way - who helps us discover our journey?
Where in your road of life is God or your higher power? Are they in the open yellow door and in the stuck red door?
Are they in the trail angel?
What are the guiding moments and deep kind of knowing and perceiving that is our birthright?
Listen to the Full Episode - S1:E1 Loved, Held, Guided, and Never Alone: The Science of Spirituality with Dr. Lisa Miller. Here Dr. Miller guides you through a practice that will help you understand how to recognize doors that are open to you and doors that are closed, so helpful for finding a path forward when facing obstacles.
About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
Follow us on X @thrivecenter
Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter
About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King
Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
9 min
May 27, 2024A Practice: Dr. Richard Davidson on Gaining Insight
Find posture, check in with your body, and take several deep, calming breaths.
Be intentional about your motivation and find a place in us to understand that practices to cultivate our own wellbeing can also help others.
This is a radical act of generosity
Bring into your mind a situation that has been challenging in some way in the recent past - whether work, family, etc.. not too difficult, but something challenging. Identify what it is.
Reflect on your own beliefs and expectations about that situation. What beliefs and expectations are we bringing to that situation?
Envision how things might be different if we came to the situation with a different set of beliefs and expectations.
Would it be different with the different beliefs and expectations?
End practice by dedicating whatever insight we may have gleaned to the benefit of others.

Listen to the Full Episode - S1: E3 Cultivating a Healthy Mind: The Neuroscience of Awareness, Connection, Insight, & Purpose with Dr. Richie Davidson. Here Dr. Davidson guides you in a practice to gain insight into your life.
About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
Follow us on X @thrivecenter
Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter
About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King
Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
9 min
May 20, 2024A Practice: Dr. Lisa Miller and Your Table of Spiritual Companions
Close your eyes and take 5 deep breaths.
In your minds eye - set a table before you.
You may invite anyone living or deceased who truly has your best interest in mind.
Ask them if they love you.
Invite your higher self - true eternal higher self - ask you if you love you.
Ask you higher power if they love you.
With all at your table sitting there - what do they need to tell you now?
This is your counsel - they are always there for you.
Listen to the full episode - S1:E1 Loved, Held, Guided, and Never Alone: The Science of Spirituality with Dr. Lisa Miller. Here Dr. Miller guides you in a practice where you use your imagination to call up the people in your life who have loved you.
About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
Follow us on X @thrivecenter
Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter
About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King
Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
7 min
May 13, 2024A Practice: Dr. Cynthia Eriksson on Grounding in the Body
Practice modified from Resmaa Menakem, My Grandmother's Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies

Begin with breathing into the nose and out through the mouth

Notice the space you are in - turning to the left and looking behind you, then turning to the right to see behind you. Feel the stretch.

Take in the space. Notice where the wall meets the ceiling. Notice the dark and light and colors in the room. Name them to yourself.

Take 3 deep breaths, noticing where the air moves in and out of the body.
Listen to the full episode - S1:E9 Responding to Trauma: Psychological Tools for Resilience and Recovery with Dr. Cynthia Eriksson. Here Dr. Eriksson guides you through a practice to ground you in your body in order to settle emotions.

About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.

Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter

Follow us on X @thrivecenter

Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King

Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook

Operations Manager: Lauren Kim

Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
6 min
May 06, 2024A Practice: Dr. Richard Davidson on Developing Awareness
We reflect on our motivation for doing the practice.

We attempt to frame the practice from the idea that practicing is altruistic - helping ourselves and others.

Bring into your mind and heart someone you know and love.

Consider their difficulties. As we breathe in, we practice removing their difficulties, and as we breathe out, we extend our love and our wishes for that person to be happy and free of suffering.

Dedicate the practice - any insight or benefit to the wellbeing and welfare of others.

Reflect on how a simple practice like this in our lives can be cultivated for the benefit of others.

Listen to the full episode. S1: E3 Cultivating a Healthy Mind: The Neuroscience of Awareness, Connection, Insight, & Purpose with Dr. Richie Davidson. Here Dr. Davidson guides you through an awareness practice.

About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.

Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter

Follow us on X @thrivecenter

Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King

Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook

Operations Manager: Lauren Kim

Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
10 min
April 01, 2024The Big Picture on Thriving & Spiritual Health — Season One Wrap Up with Dr. Pam King & Dr. Jill Westbrook
Show Notes
Why podcast about thriving and spiritual health?

Pam’s deep desire for people to thrive and become who they’re meant to be, with and for others

Practical and applicable insights for personal growth and well-being.

Bringing in experts from different research methods, spiritual traditions, and cultural backgrounds

Richie Davidson on declarative and procedural learning

Dan Siegel on integration

Growing through the throes of difficulties

Cultivating virtues and deepening relationships

Pam’s personal experience halfway through the season: caring for a child with a medical emergency

What helped Pam through the recent trauma?

When under threat, we go to what’s automatic

5 x 7 breathing

“Her crisis was exacerbated by the fact that her coping skill was not possible.”

“My holding her hand was very calming for her.”

Cynthia Eriksson on trauma and activating the parasympathetic nervous system for

Alexis Abernethy on self-care, rest, and rhythms

“Coming home to my body… listening to my body… aware of the natural rhythms of my body… trusting our bodies more.
Feeling Alone

Pam King’s deeply relational theology

Becoming is linked to our belonging and connection with others?

Shared and validated by another

Pam King’s co-authored book, The Reciprocating Self

Dan Siegel’s approach to “intraconnection” and research about attunement and awareness of others.

Alexia Salvatierra: “If you’re community is not well, then you are not well.”

Richie Davison on neuroplasticity: we have agency in our life changing and growing

Engaging in psychological or spiritual practices to expand our attention, deepen compassion, gain more insight into our values, and identify our purpose.

Find the Center for Healthy Minds Innovations App (FREE)

Purpose and Life Review with Bill Damon

Belle Liang on telling a story and finding your purpose through your own life narrative and “letting your life speak”

Sarah Schnitker and t he virtue of patience as a relevant and timely approach to life today

Miroslav Volf on joy and sorrow in the context of Christian faith and redemption

Hope for God’s presence amidst the sorrow

Psychology of belief

Theology is not just the study of God, but the knowledge and love of God, and seeking the kingdom

Life unencumbered and free

The Black experience and longing for living and dreaming unencumbered

Thriving involves systems of access and justice

“True human thriving contributes to a flourishing world. And our world will not be flourishing until all people live unencumbered.”

Dwight Radcliff on hip-hop theology and an embodied response

“Art engages us at the sensory level.“

Susan David on emotions as signposts

Art and beauty
Three tips for thriving based on Season 1 of With & For
Lean into love for yourself—finding compassion and grace for yourself

Find love in your relationships, co-creating meaning and purpose

Lean into love in the narrative of your life and your place and purpose in your community and the larger, bigger story of the world

“Beyond-the-self” purpose as a central podcast value

About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.

Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter

Follow us on X @thrivecenter

Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King

Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook

Operations Manager: Lauren Kim

Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
59 min
March 25, 2024The Power of Patience: How to Wait Well, Persevere Through Suffering, and Navigate a Fast-Paced World with Dr. Sarah Schnitker
We live in a high-speed, high-efficiency, get-it-done-yesterday society. Why would we talk about patience? But the old adage, “Patience is a virtue” is true. A core ingredient to our spiritual health in our frenetic modern world is the ability to live fully in the moment, exercise control and stability through arduous or challenging (and even traumatic) circumstances—doing so with poise and style.
Research psychologist Dr. Sarah Schnitker of Baylor University has pioneered the scientific study of patience among the virtues, exploring the physical, emotional, spiritual, and philosophical dimensions of this timeless and timely virtue. She defines patience as the ability to remain calm in the face of adversity and suffering—being able to wait well and not become inordinately overwhelmed by anxiety or sorrow.
Patience makes us ask not just “What’s worth waiting for?”, but “What’s worth suffering for?” Our English word for suffering comes from the Latin word for “enduring suffering.” And Sarah Schnitker brings theologically rich dimensions to her psychological study of patience.
In this conversation with Sarah Schnitker, we discuss:
The definition of patience as a virtue

The essential role patience can play in our pursuit of meaning and purpose

The connections between waiting and suffering—and the theological and spiritual context for patience

How patience is related to goal-setting and complementary to courage

And Sarah offers guidance for how to cultivate patience in our own lives, using a research-backed strategy to identify, imagine, and think.
About Sarah Schnitker
Sarah Schnitker is Associate Professor of Psychology and Neuroscience at Baylor University. She holds a PhD and an MA in Personality and Social Psychology from the University of California, Davis, and a BA in Psychology from Grove City College. Schnitker studies virtue and character development in adolescents and emerging adults, with a focus on the role of spirituality and religion in virtue formation. She specializes in the study of patience, self-control, gratitude, generosity, and thrift. Schnitker has procured more than $3.5 million in funding as a principle investigator on multiple research grants, and she has published in a variety of scientific journals and edited volumes. Schnitker is a Member-at-Large for APA Division 36 – Society for the Psychology of Religion and Spirituality, is a Consulting Editor for the organization’s flagship journal, Psychology of Religion and Spirituality, and is the recipient of the Virginia Sexton American Psychological Association’s Division 36 Mentoring Award. Follow her on Twitter @DrSchnitker.

About the Thrive Center
Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.

Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter

Follow us on X @thrivecenter

Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

About With & For
Host: Pam King

Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook

Operations Manager: Lauren Kim

Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
56 min
March 18, 2024Redeeming the Past: Owning Your Story, Cultivating Courage, and Finding Peace with Dr. William Damon
Developmental Psychologist William Damon, who has spent decades at Stanford University's Center on Adolescence, has focused his career on studying the human lifespan, growth, and thriving. His latest work introduces the concept of the Life Review as a tool for personal discovery and peace.
Dr. Damon's research systematically studies purpose and its operationalization for human thriving.
Purpose Defined: An enduring life goal that is both meaningful to oneself but also makes a difference beyond the self.

Key Characteristics of Purpose:
Enduring and long-term.

Personal, meaningful, and provides Agency and energy.

Transcendent (beyond the self).

Is a "lifespan developmental capacity" that is "never really complete."

A Caution: "Purpose is not a silver bullet." It does not replace a moral code or guarantee happiness.

Thriving Defined: "Becoming the person you always dreamed you’d become."
Damon's latest book, A Round of Golf with My Father, introduces the life review process. This work was motivated by his own experience uncovering a big mystery: "Who is my father?"
What is a Life Review? A systematic way of looking into your past and history to uncover mysteries and understand who you’ve been, and what that means for your present and future (drawing on the work of Robert Butler).

Forward-Looking Approach: The process acknowledges that "The past is not dead. It’s not even the past" (William Faulkner), and helps reframe and redeem past emotions (regret, guilt, shame) for the present.

The Process: It involves "Making a case study of yourself" and addressing difficult emotions by moving "From blaming to claiming to gaming."
The path to self-understanding and purpose is driven by emotional connections between courage and curiosity.
Courage is Essential: Cultivating courage is an essential virtue for a thriving life, particularly when confronting difficult or traumatic aspects of our past. Small steps make a big difference in overcoming challenges and leveraging purpose. (See also: Aristotle on courage).

Positive Youth Development (PYD): Damon's work highlights the opportunities of youth by focusing on strengths and assets rather than flaws. As Peter Benson stated, "Everyone young person has a spark."

Scope of Purpose: Purpose extends beyond personal motivations to include a wide range of psychological, moral, relational, historical, and spiritual factors. "Purpose is not an elite endeavor."
About the Thrive Center
Learn more at ⁠thethrivecenter.org⁠.
Follow us on ⁠Instagram @thrivecenter⁠
Follow us on ⁠X @thrivecenter⁠
Follow us on ⁠LinkedIn @thethrivecenter⁠

About Dr. Pam King
Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her ⁠@drpamking⁠.

About With & For
Host: Pam King
Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
1 hr