If you're codependent, you may find yourself concentrating on your loved one's addiction (sometimes more than they are). Or relying on them to validate your feelings and help you feel better. And look, no judgment at all.  But you may be surprised to learn how some of your own hurt, pain, and struggles are similar to what your partner experiences with their addiction. In this week's episode, I discuss the traits you might have in common with your partner and how it relates to each person's recovery. Just a loving reminder: you can get better and move forward with your growth regardless of whether they choose to get healthy. Your loved one's sobriety has nothing to do with your happiness. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/codependent-common-traits/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com

You Have A Lot In Common With Your Loved One

Join host Michelle Anderson as she discusses life while loving someone struggling with addiction. The goal of each episode is to leave you with encouragement, hope, and some laughs while you navigate the heartbreaking and rewarding relationship of loving someone with substance use disorder. If you're exhausted from trying to help, lonely, and unsure what to do next - you've come to the right place.

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We lay in bed at night and dream about what life would be like if we left the ones we desperately love who struggle with addiction. What would living without constant worry feel like? How would we deal with our finances, the kids, and no one to laugh with on holidays? Sometimes, imagining leaving feels so freeing (especially when they are not answering their phones or are passed out on the couch). But the next moment, it can be absolutely terrifying, thinking of being alone and the anger and judgment we might face. So, how does it really feel once we’ve moved on? https://michelleanderson.substack.com/

What Happens After We Leave

When we love someone suffering from addiction, we can often get into the bad habit of blaming ourselves for their poor behavior. Addiction is manipulative and cunning. Becoming educated women will ensure we don’t fall for one of the most common lies in the addiction playbook: if WE change, they will get sober. We have nothing to do with their sobriety. Truly. We could leave, we could stay, we could change every single trait about ourselves, and they would STILL need to decide for themselves to commit to a sober life and continue to make that choice every day for the rest of their lives. And that choice - the choice to get healthy, has nothing to do with us. https://michelleanderson.substack.com/

Three Ways Addiction Makes Us Feel Like It's Our Fault

How would it feel if I said we need to live a life that isn’t dependent on our loved one’s sobriety? And if we can create that kind of life, we can have a happy future if they get sober or not. We can learn to live with or without our partners. Here’s the loving truth: we hope and pray that our loved ones will not drink too much or stop using drugs and start being faithful. But when we put our lives on hold, hoping they will keep their promise of remaining sober and stopping their bad habits, we are leaving our happiness in their hands. https://michelleanderson.substack.com/

A Well Designed Happy Life With or Without Them

Knowing what to do when our loved one starts drinking or using drugs around the children can be difficult. Here’s one helpful tip: We don’t need to stick around when they're making bad choices. We can ask them to leave the house. If they refuse or they’re too drunk, we can pick up our keys, grab the kids, and head right out the door.  https://michelleanderson.substack.com/

What To Do With The Kids If Our Partner Is Drinking or Using Drugs

"Should I leave my partner?" What a big question. And let's be honest, it's a question that many women in this community have. Let’s first start off by saying thinking about leaving is nothing to be ashamed of. We’re doing the right thing by looking for answers, even though it’s hard. The state of our relationships is not our fault. We fell in love with someone who really struggles with a very tragic and common issue. We love them. We see their potential. And we would do anything if the ones we love just got healthy. https://michelleanderson.substack.com/

You Have A Lot In Common With Your Loved One

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