The Self-Driven Child

Your Child Is Ready For College. Are You?


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Hey folks, Ned here! In this episode, I sit down once again with my friend and co-author Dr. Bill Stixrud for a candid, real-world conversation not just about whether your kid is ready for college—but whether you are too. While we’ve talked before about student readiness, today we focus on the parent side of the equation.

We dive deep into the emotional rollercoaster of sending a kid off to college—especially that first semester. From managing your own stress and expectations to shifting your role from fixer to consultant, we cover the principles that help young adults step up while helping parents step back (without losing their minds). Whether your teen is packing their bags or you're still a few years out, this episode is packed with wisdom, laughs, and some very practical takeaways to support both you and your child through this major life transition.

 

Episode Highlights:

[1:27] - Framing the college transition and the emotional load it carries for both kids and parents
 [3:24] - Why so many students flounder during the first semester of college
 [4:50] - What it really means to be "college-ready": from laundry to self-regulation
 [7:33] - Parents’ struggle to let go: DoorDash, bad Wi-Fi, and the illusion of control
 [9:10] - The N.U.T.S. framework: understanding stress triggers in the college transition
 [13:06] - How to show up as a “non-anxious presence” for your college-bound kid
 [15:18] - Why being a consultant—not a commander—is more effective and brain-friendly
 [18:45] - Teaching resilience through trust and shared problem-solving
 [21:01] - Handling late-night panic calls and how not to take on your kid’s stress
 [24:21] - Setting healthy communication boundaries without harming the relationship
 [26:21] - Tuition, leverage, and waivers: what parents can control
[27:51] - How regular Sunday check-ins can be a win-win for parents and students
[33:10] - The messy, non-linear path to adulthood—and why that’s okay
[35:18] - Plan B thinking: preparing mentally and emotionally for alternate routes
[37:51] - Gap years, burnout, and why "not now" doesn't mean "never"
[41:20] - A personal story: why Ned didn’t call his son that first night of college
[43:12] - Final takeaways: consult, don't control—and maybe get a dog

 

Links & Resources:

·         Who's Ready For College: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-self-driven-child/id1676859533?i=1000653304892 

·         Navigating Childhood Anxiety: A Conversation With Dr. Eli Lebowitz: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-self-driven-child/id1676859533?i=1000619235562 

 

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. 

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

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The Self-Driven ChildBy Ned Johnson

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