Your Secret Is Safe With Me

Something I hear regularly is the belief that relationships that begin as affairs cannot transition into non-affair relationships. A lot of folks I work with are CONVINCED that if they start an affair relationship, it will never be able to get onto "normal" footing, and it is simply doomed to fail. But does this have to be true? Is this what you want to be true for your relationship?

In this week's episode, I help you disentangle a few things about your affair relationship, address the misconception that relationships that start as affairs and transition into non-affair relationships either don't or can't last very long, and show you why affair relationships can, in fact, last a lifetime.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/195

Are you facing doubt in your infidelity situation? Do you want to make a decision but feel uncertain about what the right decision is? Maybe you are unsure whether to end things with your marriage and pursue a relationship with your affair partner. Maybe you don't know whether your marriage is worth fighting for. Maybe you worry about the impact that exposing your affair or leaving your committed relationship will have on the people you love.

This week, I show you how to deal with doubt in your infidelity situation and why you need to be willing to look at the thoughts you currently hold about the options available to you. Find out where doubt comes from, why you experience it in the first place, and how to stop overcomplicating the decision-making process and start making decisions that feel good to you.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/194

If you are married or in a long-term relationship and also involved with someone else, there may be one big question on your mind when you think about ending your committed relationship: what exactly do you owe yourself, your partner, or your relationship before you can decide to leave it?

This week, discover why you feel so much pressure to try everything before leaving your committed relationship and what to do to avoid staying stuck in limbo when you feel this way. I share some actions you can take if you are holding back from leaving your committed relationship simply because you feel like you owe it something, and why deciding you no longer want to be in a relationship is legitimate and doesn't always mean you have to change something.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/193

Do you ever find yourself fantasizing about your ex-affair partner? Do you torture yourself reminiscing on the wonderful times you shared, and the amazing memories you hold with them, even though the infidelity situation has since come to an end?

Discover the reasons you might still be fantasizing about your ex-affair partner, and how to start to ease your way out of this if you really do want to relegate your memories to the compost bin of history. I share some tips to help you take action that is right for you the next time you notice yourself thinking about your ex-affair partner and the three choices you always have available to you when it comes to fantasizing about your ex-affair partner.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/192

There is a common belief that marriage should last a lifetime. So when somebody decides that they are dissatisfied with life as they know it, and engage in an infidelity situation as a result, it is commonly labeled as a midlife crisis. But what if waking up one morning and deciding you are dissatisfied with your life is a wonderful opportunity to reexamine what you want and what you want to do about it?

This week, I show you why engaging in infidelity isn't always a symptom of a midlife crisis, and how to establish what is really going on in your life if you are doing this. Find out what so many people believe to be the solution to a midlife crisis, what I believe to be the real solution, and why it does not involve convincing yourself to stick with the status quo and be happy with what you have.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/191

The Magic Button that I'm diving deeper into this week is the one you wish you could push to answer all your questions about your infidelity situation. The one that, when you push it, your infidelity situation magically resolves in a way that you are delighted with, without you having to do much of anything. That magic button would solve all your problems, right?

I teach you how to contend with things that are challenging in your life and infidelity situation in a way that is most empowering for you. I show you the problem with looking for external examples and answers regarding what to do about your infidelity situation, and how to, instead, use your precious time and energy learning how to come up with your own answers.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/190

People often freak out when infidelity occurs, even if it has pretty much zero impact on their lives. It gets treated as a big scandal that the "perpetrator" needs to redeem themselves from. Whether or not you buy into the idea that scandal, disgrace, and redemption are real things, other people turning your experiences into a public spectacle is a very real thing, and it's a pretty big deal.

Tune in this week to discover what you need to consider if you find yourself the object of a scandalous spectacle following an affair. I share two parallel practices for dealing with being the object of a scandal, and you'll learn how to take responsibility and begin the work of redeeming yourself in your own eyes, if that's what you choose to do in this situation.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/189

Have you ever found yourself in an affair situation with someone who is monogamously committed to someone else? For a while, your partner is pretty sure they want to leave that relationship and pursue a non-affair relationship with you. They share their intentions to leave their partner for weeks, months, or even years, and they may even take action to prove these intentions.

Then, one day, your affair partner reaches the point where they decide that they can't leave their committed relationship after all. They decide to stay in that relationship, despite everything they have said and done in their affair relationship with you. So what happened? And what the hell do you do now?! Tune in this week to find out.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/188

How often do you make a decision that you think you're happy with, then doubt yourself and fear it was the wrong one because you feel so many mixed emotions about it? When you make a major decision in your life, about your infidelity situation or otherwise, you are most likely going to have mixed thoughts and feelings about it, but that DOESN'T mean it's a problem or a sign you should choose differently.

In this week's episode of Your Secret Is Safe With Me, learn why it is completely okay to change your mind on any decision you make and the importance of making decisions with a managed mind. Find out why making a decision with a managed mind doesn't mean you can't change your mind further down the line and how I used exactly what I'm teaching you this week in my own life to put an end to a program I was offering so soon after putting it out into the world.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/187

Join me for part two of "Why I Do the Work I Do" as I share the turning point that led me to become a relationship coach specializing in non-judgmental assistance to people engaging in infidelity, and exactly what it took for me to get here. I'm picking up where I left off last week and sharing the power of taking small steps forward, even when your confidence is wavering, and how I created this unique role for myself despite believing for a while that I didn't have what it takes to be an entrepreneur.

You CAN create a version of yourself and your life that doesn't exist yet, and I'm showing you how in this episode.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://mariemurphyphd.com/186