Todd and Cathy discuss how and why our kids trigger us, and how to lessen our reactivity and reframe our experiences. They also discuss the importance of gratitude and why we should learn to ride the waves and roll with the changes.

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2:20 Zen Parenting Moment

6:11 Todd’s quick takes (Do not disturb)

12:21 It triggers your shame/guilt

17:38 It causes you to question your parenting

24:08 You are taking the behavior personally

28:19 You have an unidentified need in the moment (hungry/tired)

30:03 Pinna is the only audio on-demand streaming service for kids 3-12!  Enter the coupon code “ZPR” for one year of Pinna for 50% off

33:07 You feel your child is intentionally being disrespectful

41:41 You were already stressed/irritated

46:33 You expect they should know better

55:38 You feel a lack of control in the situation

58:25 Their big reactions trigger your anxiety or trauma

1:00:42 You didn’t realize the behavior was their way of communicating

Todd and Cathy discuss Michael Singer’s The Untethered Soul, specifically what it means to manage our “thorns” or inner pain that we react to our do our best to avoid. They discuss the paradoxical nature of life and uncertainty, and how our goal is to manage discomfort, not runaway or avoid. They share some of their mindfulness tools and a new definition of enlightenment.

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10:00 Thorns

30:03 Pinna is the only audio on-demand streaming service for kids 3-12!  Enter the coupon code “ZPR” for one year of Pinna for 50% off

41:35 Not going for a ride with your thoughts

Cathy and Todd discuss how to help our kids discover intrinsic motivation (internally motivated because it feels good and right) instead of extrinsic motivation (external rewards such as grades, praise, fame). They also discuss MenConnect, a solution to the epidemic of lonely men, and how to make mornings calmer and more collaborative.

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8:45 Apologize for crying

13:47 MenLiving Connect

17:53 Calm mornings

21:52 Busy or not busy?

30:04 Pinna is the only audio on-demand streaming service for kids 3-12!  Enter the coupon code “ZPR” for one year of Pinna for 50% off

55:42 Night Ranger

Todd and Cathy do a deep dive into the five essential parenting practices that Cathy shared in her Zen Parenting Moment Newsletter last Friday. They share how these practices create connection and meaning in the home and beyond.

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9:53 Practice self-compassion

21:18 Practice curiosity

23:49 Pinna is the only audio on-demand streaming service for kids 3-12!  Enter the coupon code “ZPR” for one year of Pinna for 50% off

34:56 Practice creativity

43:05 Practice listening

47:10 Practice openness

Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of teaching both values AND safety, and why they work together to create an optimal environment for you kids. They also discuss the top 15 best parenting role models from pop culture and what made them so successful (a few are debatable…).

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Time Stamps:

0:24 Halloween costume talk

8:07 Todd not listening

14:05 Values & Safety

31:46 Pinna is the only audio on-demand streaming service for kids 3-12!  Enter the coupon code “ZPR” for one year of Pinna for 50% off

34:16 Rules

36:08 Kids Taking pictures of their butt

44:00 Cathy shares when she got in trouble as a teenager

46:22 Pop Culturing parenting

Cathy and Todd discuss taking responsibility without blaming ourselves for everything that happens. They discuss how certain self-help books, groups, and cults have the power to convince people that they are “at cause” for everything that happens, negating how outside influences also play a role in eventual outcomes. They discuss the difference between reaction and response, why emotions like anger and envy can be helpful, and of course, Taylor Swift’s new album, Midnights.

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Cathy and Todd discuss codependency, enmeshment, over identification, and other issues that can be layered and difficult to define. They share the importance of learning to say no, why boundaries are important in every relationship, and how paying attention and questioning can become a daily habit.

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Todd and Cathy are interviewed by their friend Dr. Alexandra Solomon.  She ask them about how they met, their history, and the trials and tribulations of their couple hood.

Time Stamp

1:04:58 Avid Co./Team Zen/Todd Adams Coaching

Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

All things ZPR can be found on our Resources Page

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

Stranger Things, Unanswered Questions Season 4 (Volume 2)

The Best of Taylor Swift

Todd and Cathy discuss John & Julie Gottman’s research around “bids for connection”, specifically how couples who acknowledge each other’s bids 86% of the time stay married and connected. They also discuss how music and pop culture helps us connect to our kids, and why acknowledging each other’s texts makes a big difference.

Hurricane Ian Relief Organizations

The Gottman Institute Bids for Affection

All things ZPR can be found on our Resources Page

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Todd and Cathy discuss the practice of gratitude (specifically how to notice, savor, and express) and how it helps the brain pay attention to what’s working. They discuss the four noble truths, appreciating people’s quirks, and songs named after the bands that sing them.

All things ZPR can be found on our Resources Page

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys