After the Affair

146. Infidelity Recovery Expert Q&A: The Questions You’re Too Tired to Keep Asking


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When you’re in the thick of healing after betrayal, it’s not just the pain that drains you. it’s the unanswered questions that loop endlessly in your mind.

In this Q&A episode, I respond to four of the most emotionally exhausting questions I hear in my coaching work and online communities. These aren’t the questions people ask once, they’re the ones they ask over and over, quietly, in their own head.

We’re covering:

  • How to rebuild trust when you don’t even trust yourself anymore
  • What to do when your partner says they’ve changed but it doesn’t feel different
  • Why you still feel stuck in pain even after intellectually “moving on”
  • Whether you can ever stop fearing they’ll betray you again if you don’t have the whole truth
  • If you’ve been silently carrying these questions… this episode is for you.

    Key Takeaways
    • Self-trust isn’t about always being right, it’s about how you respond to being wrong.
    • Real change isn’t in the words your partner says; it’s in the emotional safety you feel.
    • Healing is not an intellectual achievement, it’s a felt experience.
    • Needing every detail for closure might offer control, but it often delays peace.
    • What question has been looping in your mind during recovery? Send me a message or email and let me know. And if this episode resonated, share it with someone who might need to hear it too.

      Resources Mentioned
      • Want deeper support in your recovery? Join the Chaos to Clarity group coaching program or reach out for 1:1 coaching - visit lifecoachluke.com for more information
      • Email me the word “boundary144” to [email protected] to receive my free Boundaries Blueprint.
      • Connect with Luke:

        • Website: www.lifecoachluke.com
        • Instagram: @mylifecoachluke
        • Join the After the Affair community at www.facebook.com/groups/aftertheaffaircommunity

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          After the AffairBy Luke Shillings

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