You just said something that pissed off your partner. But geez, you were only joking. Then your friend asked for your opinion about what they were wearing, and was hurt by what you said. It seems like you’re always stepping on landmines, then constantly defending what you said or going on damage control. Should you be honest or not? Why is everyone so damn sensitive?

Maybe it’s not them. When you don’t own what you say, and instead blow it off by saying, “I call it like I see it!” or “That’s just how I was raised,” or “Can’t you take a joke?” you invalidate the other person. You’re not able to see beyond your own perspective to realize the impact it has on others. If you want to have relationships that you’re not constantly repairing, take a deeper look at what you say and why. In this week’s podcast you’ll be challenged to look at the motivation behind the way you communicate. What are you trying to achieve? Is it working? What negative beliefs are at play? This self-examination will keep you from running on autopilot so you catch yourself before putting your foot in your mouth. It’s a relationship saver.

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