ADHD Mums

Your child comes home from school withdrawn, teary, or exploding in rage — and you’re expected to stay calm. Every cell in your body wants to burn the system down, but the school says ‘We’re handling it’. You can see your child’s spark dimming, and you’re being told to keep your emotions in check so you’re not labelled ‘the emotional mum’.

Psychologist Mona Delahooke reminds us that children’s behaviour is a direct reflection of their nervous system regulation. If your child shuts down, lashes out, avoids, cries, or seems ‘off’, it’s often their nervous system saying: I’m not safe. And safety isn’t about compliance — a child can ‘behave’ all day and still be in distress.

Dr Gabor Maté talks about how children’s experiences can activate a parent’s own unresolved trauma — especially for mothers. If you grew up feeling unprotected or disbelieved, protecting your child may feel like your number one mission. But when you’re operating from that deep trigger, the intensity can sometimes lead to mistakes — not because you’re wrong to protect them, but because the system forces you to fight while dysregulated yourself.

This episode is for every parent sitting in that impossible gap between fury and strategy. Jane unpacks the nervous system science, the emotional triggers, and the practical advocacy steps that actually protect your child — without burning yourself out in the process.

You’ll learn:

• How to recognise when your child’s behaviour is a nervous system ‘distress signal’
• Why staying calm isn’t about ignoring your emotions — it’s about using them effectively
• What to do before approaching the school, so you’re heard instead of dismissed
• How to document incidents and escalate without losing trust or credibility
• The fine line between resilience-building and retraumatising
• Scripts and safety plans that support both you and your child

Because protecting your child and staying grounded aren’t opposites — they’re both part of getting results that last.

🔗 ADHD Mums Resource

The 4 F's FREE Resource & the Bullying Response Kit – A step-by-step guide to navigating school bullying, with scripts, documentation templates, and emotional regulation tools for both you and your child. Get the Kit here

Making School Work - Your go-to advocacy guide for when your neurodivergent child isn’t coping — and the school says they’re fine. Packed with scripts, templates, and clarity for IEPs, school refusal, and shutdowns, it helps you hold your ground in the rooms that matter. Get it here

A Kit for Making the Mental Load Visible - This kit gives you practical, ADHD-friendly ways to offload invisible tasks and delegate in a way that actually sticks – without micromanaging, nagging, or having it boomerang straight back onto you. Get the Kit here

🎧 Related Episodes

Raising Strong Children: How to Support Without Always Solving Their Problems – Emma Rose

• Spotify: Listen here
• Apple Podcasts: Listen here

QUICK RESET: Advocating for Your Child Shouldn’t Break You — But It Often Does

•  Spotify: Listen here 
•  Apple Podcasts: Listen here

SCHOOL SERIES: When School Stops Feeling Safe

• Spotify: Listen here 
•  Apple Podcasts: Listen here

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

Topics Covered in This Episode

bullying prevention, ADHD parenting, school advocacy, nervous system regulation, fight-flight-freeze-fawn, co-regulation, trauma triggers, Dr Mona Delahooke, Dr Gabor Maté, documenting incidents, resilience vs trauma, protecting trust with teens, emotional safety in schools, trauma-informed parenting, parent nervous system repair

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

If school mornings in your house feel like a high-stakes obstacle course — socks missing, bags unpacked, emotions running high — this episode will feel like a deep breath you didn’t know you needed.

Jane is joined by Sharon Collon from The Functional Family to talk about how to survive those brutal pre-school hours without burning every ounce of patience you have before 9am. This isn’t about colour-coded charts or impossible routines — it’s about understanding ADHD brains, setting realistic expectations, and making mornings less about conflict and more about connection.

Sharon shares her game-changing tips for managing transitions, reducing overwhelm, and creating a morning rhythm that actually works for neurodivergent kids (and parents). Expect real-life stories, scripts you can try tomorrow, and the relief of knowing you’re not the only family wrestling with mismatched socks at the worst possible time.

In This Episode

• Why “just get ready” doesn’t work for ADHD kids — and what to say instead
• How to identify and remove the hidden triggers that derail mornings
• The one small change that can stop meltdowns before they start
• Why your own regulation matters more than your schedule
• How to use connection as a tool (without adding to your mental load)
• Rethinking reward charts, punishments, and morning “discipline”

This Episode Is For You If

– You dread the school run before you’ve even opened your eyes
– Your mornings are a mix of tears, yelling, and frantic searches for missing shoes
– You want calmer starts without sacrificing your sanity

About Sharon Collon

Sharon is the founder of The Functional Family, helping families with ADHD create systems that work in the real world.
🌐 Website: thefunctionalfamily.com

 📸 Instagram: @thefunctionalfamily

Related Episodes

• S1 E34: Being Neurotypical in a Relationship with an ADHD Person
  🎧 Spotify | Apple Podcasts
• S1 E42: ADHD and Parenting
  🎧 Spotify | Apple Podcasts

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE

ADHD school mornings, parenting burnout, neurodivergent routines, emotional regulation, school run stress, ADHD parenting tips, transitions for ADHD kids, low-demand mornings, connection before compliance, realistic family systems, executive function support, parenting scripts, reducing morning meltdowns, ADHD-friendly routines, self-regulation strategies, school preparation tips, functional family systems, neuroaffirming parenting, behaviour without punishment, practical ADHD strategies.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

If you’ve already heard MY UPDATE: What Happens When You Lose the Meds That Helped You Survive, you know Part 1 ended on the decision to have lipedema surgery after years of chronic pain, medical dismissal, and the sudden loss of ADHD medication.

This is what happened next.

In this follow-up episode, Jane takes you behind the curtain of the surgery itself — the reality of navigating a system that still sidelines women’s pain, the complications that no one warns you about, and the rare heart condition that made recovery far more complex than expected. From confronting family history to managing without ADHD meds during the most physically demanding season of her life, Jane shares the messy truth of advocating for your health when the system isn’t built for you.

It’s raw, unfiltered, and painfully familiar for anyone who’s ever been left to fight for care they shouldn’t have to beg for.

✨ IN THIS EPISODE:

• What surgery for lipedema is actually like — and what recovery demands of your body
• The rare heart finding that changed everything mid-recovery
• The emotional toll of being unsupported in hospital
• The overlap between lipedema, neurodivergence, and chronic illness
• How losing ADHD medication in the middle of recovery amplified every challenge
• Why women’s health advocacy has to start with telling the full, unvarnished story

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You listened to Part 1 and want to know the full story
– You’ve experienced surgery or medical treatment without adequate support
– You’re living with invisible illness and fighting to be believed
– You’ve faced the grief of losing tools that helped you function

Listen to Part 1: What Happens When You Lose the Meds That Helped You Survive

Check out IG posts here.

📚 Resources & References

Related Episodes:

Connection Between ADHD, EDS and POTS

Listen here on Spotify

Listen here on Apple

Lipedema surgery information

• ADHD Mums blog post  — Photos, personal journey, and practical tips for navigating the lipedema surgery system.
• Check your symptoms – Lipedema Foundation — Clear, accessible checklist to help identify potential signs of lipedema and start informed conversations with health providers.

💓 SVT (Supraventricular Tachycardia)

• Heart Foundation – Heart Arrhythmia & SVT — Evidence-based info on symptoms, diagnosis, and treatment for heart rhythm conditions including SVT.

🦓 Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS)

•  Ehlers-Danlos Society Australia — Advocacy, support, and medical resources for people with EDS.
• Episode 41: ADHD + EDS and POTS – Spotify | Apple Podcast — How these conditions overlap, with expert and lived-experience insight.
• Episode 62: Burnout, Pain & Weird Symptoms? The ADHD Link No One Told Us About – Spotify | Apple Podcast — The hidden ADHD links to chronic pain, fatigue, and “mystery” symptoms.

🧬 RYR2 rare heart gene

• MedlinePlus – RYR2 Gene Information — Plain-language explanation of this rare genetic variant linked to heart rhythm issues.

💬 Community

•  ADHD Mums Facebook Group — A safe, neuro-affirming space to connect with other ADHD mums, share resources, and get support.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

🧠 TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
lipedema surgery, invisible illness, women’s health gaslighting, rare heart conditions, SVT, RYR2 gene, ADHD medication access, stimulant withdrawal, chronic illness grief, hypermobility, ARFID, anorexia history, medical trauma, neurodivergent women’s health, hospital recovery, emotional regulation, executive dysfunction, parenting with chronic illness, survival mode, neuroaffirming support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

This isn’t just about medication. It’s about the pattern so many ADHD mums find themselves in — chasing answers, finding partial relief, and then hitting a wall you never saw coming.

In this raw, unfiltered episode, Jane shares the deeply personal story of what happened when her body could no longer tolerate ADHD medication — and how a lifetime of overlapping diagnoses, chronic conditions, and medical gaslighting shaped the road to that moment.

From discovering she had lipedema after years of pain, to navigating a brutal and underfunded surgery system, this is an honest account of resilience, privilege, and the fight to be taken seriously in a medical landscape that often dismisses women’s health. It’s about grief for the tools you lose, hope for the ones you gain, and the messy truth of managing ADHD when your options suddenly shrink.

💬 In this episode, we cover:

• The moment ADHD meds stopped being an option — and what came next
• The hidden connection between neurodivergence and lipedema
• What lipedema actually is (and why it’s so often misdiagnosed)
• The physical and emotional toll of chronic pain
• What it’s like to navigate an inaccessible surgery system in Australia
• Why women’s pain is still minimised, dismissed, and underfunded
• The real cost — financial, physical, emotional — of managing an “invisible” disability
• What needs to change so ADHD mums aren’t left without safe, effective support
  
  

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You’ve ever had to choose between functioning and your health
– You’ve been dismissed or told to “just lose weight” when something was wrong
– You want to understand the overlap between ADHD, autism, chronic pain, and women’s health neglect
– You’re tired of hearing “we can’t help you” from the systems meant to support you

Check out IG posts here.

Listen to Part 2: The Lipedema Op: The Invisible Illness You Weren’t Supposed to Notice

📚 Resources & References

Related Episodes:

Connection Between ADHD, EDS and POTS

Listen here on Spotify

Listen here on Apple

Lipedema surgery information

• ADHD Mums blog post  — Photos, personal journey, and practical tips for navigating the lipedema surgery system.
• Check your symptoms – Lipedema Foundation — Clear, accessible checklist to help identify potential signs of lipedema and start informed conversations with health providers.

💓 SVT (Supraventricular Tachycardia)

• Heart Foundation – Heart Arrhythmia & SVT — Evidence-based info on symptoms, diagnosis, and treatment for heart rhythm conditions including SVT.

🦓 Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS)

•  Ehlers-Danlos Society Australia — Advocacy, support, and medical resources for people with EDS.
• Episode 41: ADHD + EDS and POTS – Spotify | Apple Podcast — How these conditions overlap, with expert and lived-experience insight.
• Episode 62: Burnout, Pain & Weird Symptoms? The ADHD Link No One Told Us About – Spotify | Apple Podcast — The hidden ADHD links to chronic pain, fatigue, and “mystery” symptoms.

🧬 RYR2 rare heart gene

• MedlinePlus – RYR2 Gene Information — Plain-language explanation of this rare genetic variant linked to heart rhythm issues.

💬 Community

•  ADHD Mums Facebook Group — A safe, neuro-affirming space to connect with other ADHD mums, share resources, and get support.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

🧠 TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
ADHD medication side effects, ADHD mums, stimulant intolerance, lipedema, neurodivergence and chronic illness, women’s health funding, medical gaslighting, ADHD alternatives, chronic pain management, surgery access Australia, disability advocacy, invisible disability, health privilege, neuroaffirming care, ADHD burnout, emotional resilience.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

With Special Guest: NSW Minister for Mental Health, Rose Jackson

💬 “It shouldn’t cost thousands of dollars and 12 months on a waitlist just to feel like a functioning parent.”

For years, ADHD families have been begging for change — and this time, someone in government actually listened. In this landmark conversation, Jane is joined by NSW Minister Rose Jackson to talk about what’s finally shifting in ADHD healthcare access — and why it matters for every overwhelmed family, not just those in Sydney.

They cover everything from GP prescribing reforms to the national medication shortage, and what’s really happening behind the scenes on the ADHD policy agenda.

This isn’t just a political update — it’s the emotional and systemic reality check that neurodivergent families deserve.

🔥 WHAT’S INSIDE THIS EPISODE

🧠 Diagnosis Access is Changing
Why NSW is opening up ADHD diagnosis + prescribing to GPs (finally) — and what that means for you.

💊 The ADHD Medication Crisis
Where things stand with the stimulant shortage, and what states are (and aren’t) doing about it.

📍 Rural + Regional Families
How these reforms are finally recognising the postcode penalty for ADHD care.

📉 Breaking the Specialist Bottleneck
Why removing repeat script requirements from psychiatrists could free up the whole system.

🧾 The Cost of Getting Help
The quiet injustice of being forced to ‘start from scratch’ (and pay for it) every time you change providers.

🏫 Support in Schools
Why we can’t keep waiting for kids to ‘fail badly enough’ before they get help — and what’s changing in NSW classrooms.

💭 FOR YOU IF:
– You’ve been stuck on a 12-month waitlist and wondering if anyone in power actually understands
– You’ve had to choose between groceries and an ADHD consult
– You want policy change that’s built on lived experience — not more red tape

📢 WE NEED YOUR VOICE
Jane and Rose talk openly about how real change doesn’t start in Parliament — it starts in platforms like this. If this episode fired you up, share it with someone who needs to know they’re not alone in the fight for accessible ADHD care.

📢 Advocacy + Petitions
• 🏫 Schools in Crisis Petition – Sign here

• ⚖️ NDIS Cuts Petition – Sign here

👊 Because families shouldn’t have to burn out just to access basic care.

🧰 RELATED RESOURCES

• ADHD Medication Advocacy Guide
• ADHD Planner & Personal Values Workbook
• Find an ADHD-affirming paediatrician or psychiatrist
• TGA Medication Shortage Portal
• Blog Version

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

🧠 TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:

ADHD medication access, stimulant shortage Australia, ADHD mums, GP prescribing reforms, ADHD diagnosis barriers, rural healthcare inequality, mental health policy, Rose Jackson, neurodivergent families, ADHD advocacy, government reform, school support for ADHD, medication equity, ADHD specialist bottleneck, parenting burnout, invisible disability, ADHD and cost of living, PBS restrictions, TGA stimulant updates, accessible diagnosis, ADHD health crisis.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

This episode isn’t polished. It’s not another “mum guilt” talk with a tidy little bow. It’s a confession — 10 brutally honest fears that live under the surface of parenting with ADHD. The kind you lie awake thinking about. The kind you’re scared to say out loud.

From burnout to school calls, masking to medical forms — this Quick Reset is for the mums who are terrified of missing something important. Who love their kids fiercely, but carry a quiet dread that they’re not doing enough. Jane gets real about what it feels like to parent while managing executive dysfunction, health issues, shame spirals, and a system that was never built for us.

This isn’t weakness. It’s truth. And you’re not the only one thinking it.

🧠 What’s Inside:
• The panic of forgetting library day… again
• School calls that make your stomach drop
• The invisible mental load of paperwork, NDIS, permission slips, admin
• Fears you’ll burn out — and not bounce back this time
• Wondering if teachers think you’re the problem
• The heartbreak of feeling like chaos will outshine your love
• Masking with friends and fearing rejection if you're fully yourself
• Medical neglect, chronic fatigue, and fearing you're running out of time

💬 This isn’t just a list. It’s a reckoning.
Each fear is unpacked through the lens of ADHD neurology, emotional time travel, rejection sensitivity, and the legacy of being told to ‘just try harder’. Jane also tackles four common myths ADHD mums are told — and gives you the actual research to push back.

💥 This episode is for you if:
– You live with a constant, low-level fear of forgetting something vital
– You feel like your brain is fighting a system built against you
– You want to know that someone else gets it — fully, honestly, no fluff

📥 Share your own:
This episode is part of the CONFESSIONS series. If you’d like to add your own anonymous confession (or be featured in a future episode), submit it here:
👉 https://form.jotform.com/251238072679867

📚 Mentioned in this episode:
• ADHD Planner & Personal Values Workbook — a practical, non-performative way to anchor your week when everything feels like a blur. https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-planner-and-values/

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
ADHD mums, parenting fear, school anxiety, rejection sensitivity, executive dysfunction, school trauma, mental load, invisible labour, masking, burnout, internalised shame, school admin stress, permission slip guilt, hypervigilance, chronic fatigue, parenting overwhelm, ADHD parenting truths, self-worth, vulnerability, real motherhood, emotional honesty.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

If you’ve ever jolted awake at 3:11am spiralling over something you said in 2019 — you are not alone.

This Quick Reset is for the mums lying in bed, exhausted but wired, wondering if their brain is broken. (Spoiler: it’s not.)

In this raw and validating episode, Jane unpacks the real reasons so many neurodivergent women are waking up in the middle of the night. It’s not just anxiety. It’s hormones, cortisol spikes, perimenopause, trauma, overstimulation — and nervous systems that have been stuck in survival mode for years.

This episode gives you permission to stop blaming yourself for ‘bad sleep’ and start exploring what your body might actually be trying to say.

✨ IN THIS RESET:
• Why you might wake up at the exact same time every night
• What progesterone and GABA have to do with your 3am brain spiral
• Cortisol spikes, perimenopause, and stress-pattern sleep
• Why lying in bed makes it worse — and what to do instead
• The ‘entree thought’ that leads to a full-blown shame tornado
• Real stories, lived experience, and no-pressure ideas to try
• What actually helped Jane stop dreading the night

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You wake up at 3am and feel like your brain is on fire
– You spiral through every mistake you’ve ever made — and then still have to parent all day
– You’ve tried all the sleep hygiene hacks and nothing works

📥 Grab free ADHD resources at: https://adhdmums.com.au/resources/ 

📖 Read Blog Version HERE.

Other Quick Reset Episodes:

• S3E8 Advocating for Your Child Shouldn’t Break You — But It Often Does: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E10 Why am I bracing for impact when nothing is wrong?: Spotify  | Apple Podcast
• S3E12 I can’t stop snapping when my child does this one thing: Spotify | Apple Podcast 
• S3E14 I Cancel Plans Because I Don’t Have the Energy to Fake My Personality: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E15 He wants the Maldives but we can't even manage the park: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E16 No meds, No plan, and no help..... but yet they're still calling us undiagnosed: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E17 How we survive the 3- 6:00 PM shit show when kids are coming down off meds: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E18 Why you are bad at asking for help and what to do instead: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E22 Why self-care feels like another fucking task: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E24 The ADHD Myth of 'Just try Harder': Spotify | Apple Podcast

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
3am wakeups, ADHD insomnia, perimenopause, neurodivergent women, cortisol spikes, progesterone crash, GABA regulation, executive dysfunction, trauma-affected sleep, emotional overload, hormone dysregulation, ADHD parenting, internalised anxiety, rejection sensitivity, hypervigilance, shame spiral, ADHD women, sleep and trauma, chronic stress patterns.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

What if the exhaustion you're carrying isn’t about your daughter’s needs — but about the systems stacked against her? In this fiercely honest conversation, Jane sits down with Katie Koullas, founder of Yellow Ladybugs, to unpack the invisible weight neurodivergent mums carry while raising autistic and ADHD girls. From masking to missed diagnoses, perfectionism to protection — this episode doesn’t shy away from the real stuff. It validates the hell out of the lived experience of raising girls who internalise everything and explode only when no one’s watching.

Katie shares her experience as a mum, advocate, and changemaker, giving voice to the deep guilt, relentless fear, and raw love that shape this reality — and what she’s learned about lightening the emotional load without selling your soul in the process.

💡 What We Cover:
• Why the emotional load isn’t about your daughter — it’s about the world she’s navigating
• The heartbreak of watching your daughter mask to survive
• The reality of invisible struggles in schools, friendships, and diagnosis
• How society gaslights and minimises internalising neurodivergent girls
• How mums can reframe guilt, lean into radical acceptance, and still model strength
• What burnout looks like when you're carrying it all — and how to catch it before it knocks you out
• How we actually start changing the systems (hint: stop waiting for the neurotypicals)
• What Katie wishes every mum raising a neurodivergent daughter had access to

🔗 Resources & Links:

• Learn more about Yellow Ladybugs and register for the June conference: yellowladybugs.com.au
• Follow Katie and Yellow Ladybugs on Instagram 

Related episodes:

• When School Becomes the Trauma (S3E2) | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• Burnout Starts in the Classroom (S3E3) | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• RSD & Emotional Intensity (S2 Ep 81) | Spotify | Apple Podcast

🎧 Listen Now:
If you’ve ever felt like you’re parenting in secret, constantly translating your daughter’s needs to people who just don’t get it — this is the episode you didn’t know you needed. Tune in, share it with another mum carrying too much, and remind yourself you’re not failing — you’re unsupported.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
ADHD masking, autistic girls, neurodivergent parenting, emotional burnout, ADHD and guilt, internalisers, invisible needs in school, Yellow Ladybugs, neuroaffirming support, autism diagnosis, teenage girls and shutdowns, parent burnout, sensory overload, radical acceptance parenting, co-regulation exhaustion, ADHD shame, internalised ableism, school system failure, masking and meltdown, ADHD mum support, ADHD podcast Australia, Katie Koullas, neurodivergent self-advocacy, changing the system as a mum.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

If you’ve ever stood frozen in the kitchen, fully aware of what needs doing — and still couldn’t start — this episode is for you.

This week’s Quick Reset tears apart the toxic myth that ADHD mums just need to “try harder.” Jane unpacks what’s actually happening when your brain stalls, and why shame, not laziness, is often the real culprit. From inner critics echoing old failures to the neuroscience behind executive dysfunction, this is a raw, validating, and darkly funny call to stop blaming effort — and start working with your brain instead.

You’ll learn practical, low-pressure strategies to get started (no, not with a new app), and finally understand why “just do it” advice doesn’t just fail ADHD mums — it hurts us.

✨ IN THIS RESET:

• The damaging myth of laziness and willpower
• How shame shuts down executive function
• Why ADHD is not about motivation — it’s about regulation
• What to say to yourself instead of “I just need to focus”
• Brain-based strategies for task initiation that actually help
• Real talk about fridge purchases, hyperfocus, and starting vs finishing
• Why “trying harder” never fixed burnout — and never will

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You keep thinking, “I should be able to do this” — but can’t start
– You’ve got planners, lists, and alarms… and still feel stuck
– You want to stop spiralling into shame and start using strategies that work for your brain

🔗 Sources & Citations:

• Brown, T. E. (2006). Attention Deficit Disorder: The Unfocused Mind in Children and Adults. Yale University Press.
• Barkley, R. A., Murphy, K. R., & Fischer, M. (2006). The ADHD Report, 14(6), 6–11.
• Volkow, N. D., Wang, G.-J., Kollins, S. H., Wigal, T. L., Newcorn, J. H., Telang, F., ... & Swanson, J. M. (2011). “Motivation deficit in ADHD is associated with dysfunction of the dopamine reward pathway.” Molecular Psychiatry, 16(11), 1147–1154.
• Sonuga-Barke, E. J. S. (2005). “Causal models of ADHD: From common simple deficits to multiple developmental pathways.” Biological Psychiatry, 57(11), 1231–1238.

📚 Mentioned Resource:

• ADHD Planner & Personal Values Workbook — Designed to help you rebuild capacity, re-centre your day, and stop measuring your worth by productivity.
• Explore more ADHD-friendly resources: https://adhdmums.com.au/resources/

Other Quick Reset Episodes:

• S3E8 Advocating for Your Child Shouldn’t Break You — But It Often Does: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E10 Why am I bracing for impact when nothing is wrong?: Spotify  | Apple Podcast
• S3E12 I can’t stop snapping when my child does this one thing: Spotify | Apple Podcast 
• S3E14 I Cancel Plans Because I Don’t Have the Energy to Fake My Personality: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E15 He wants the Maldives but we can't even manage the park: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E16 No meds, No plan, and no help..... but yet they're still calling us undiagnosed: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E17 How we survive the 3- 6:00 PM shit show when kids are coming down off meds: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S3E18 Why you are bad at asking for help and what to do instead: Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E22 Why self-care feels like another fucking task: Spotify | Apple Podcast

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED:
ADHD executive dysfunction, task initiation, parenting with ADHD, emotional regulation, ADHD shame spiral, performance parenting, burnout, trauma-informed self-support, neuroaffirming strategies, inner critic, motivation myths, hyperfocus, late diagnosis, ADHD overwhelm, doing things differently, permission to rest.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces

With special guest: Jayde Couldewell from Beyond the Bump

If you thought finally getting a diagnosis and trying meds would be the end of your chaos — but you’re still overwhelmed, melting down, or yelling into the void — this one’s for you.

In this raw, funny, and emotionally honest episode, Jane is joined by Jayde Couldewell to talk about what really happens after diagnosis. Spoiler: the meds help, but they’re not the whole story. Together, they unpack what comes next — from executive function and exercise, to morning meltdowns and postnatal rage, to finally being able to hear your own thoughts.

Jayde shares the real-life before-and-after: what it took to make consistent change after starting meds, why boundaries mattered more than bubble baths, and how she learned to parent herself while parenting three kids.

✨ IN THIS RESET:

• Why ADHD meds are a powerful tool — but not a magic fix
• The grief and clarity that comes with late diagnosis
• How self-understanding created space for real change
• Building habits with ADHD (without making it a full-time job)
• Why it’s normal to need more than just one script
• The difference between the ‘old you’ and your real self underneath the chaos
• How to start small — and stay kind to yourself when it feels hard

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You’re newly diagnosed and wondering what now?
– You’re still waiting for the mythical “life-changing moment” after meds
– You want to see how someone made it work — without toxic positivity or 5am bootcamps

Follow Beyond the Bump Podcast on IG.

📥 Related Resources:
• Free ADHD Medication Advocacy Guide

• TGA Medication Shortage Portal

🎧 Related Episodes:

• S2E38 How ADHD medication revealed my Autistic traits | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E39 Misdiagnosis in ADHD and Bipolar Disorder with Georgia Poletti-Moulds | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E61 Unhealthy Habits & ADHD: Why We Get Stuck & How to Shift | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• S2E82 ADHD or PTSD? Why So Many Women Are Misdiagnosed with Amanda Moses | Spotify | Apple Podcast
• Beyond the Bump Episode 208: ADHD - is it mum overwhelm or could it be something more? Talking ADHD in women | Spotify | Apple Podcast

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

TOPICS COVERED IN THIS EPISODE:
ADHD diagnosis, stimulant medication, late-diagnosed women, executive dysfunction, self-care with ADHD, postnatal rage, parenting burnout, creating new routines, morning overwhelm, neurodivergent mums, co-regulation, antidepressants, sensory processing, shame recovery, trauma-informed support, adult ADHD, performance burnout, self-trust, ADHD and exercise, nervous system healing.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Give away bad for biz - free resources

Free Resouces