Authentic

The freedom I’ve found in letting my darkness be there without needing it to go away or fixed in order for me to do epic shit, is beyond words.I can’t tell you how many YEARS I wasted trying to fix the dark so I could THEN play in my light. Yet every damn time I’d fix it, thinking BOOM, I’m free, it’d come back and I would feel utter despair and hopelessness.

I’d think I’m a screw up, an idiot, a loser, a nobody, a failure. When I realised my focus was in wasted territory I made it my mission to let my darkness be there, come up when it wanted to have its say and then leave it be. So now when I create something new or meet a new level of potential and I’m metaphorically shitting myself, I let myself feel excited, courageous and pumped AND anxious as all fk.

Prior to this I would hate that I felt all the “bad” feelings, punishing myself for thinking and feeling negative things. It’s been one of the toughest lessons to learn to accept my dark side and appreciate its presence, but it’s been worth the battle.

Insta - @kat.john

Website - katjohn.com.au

Online course - unfknlimited.com

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There's cool shit in your life that you want to go for and experience. It can be living in a new state or city, starting your own business, changing industries, leaving your job to travel, or whatever. But there's a little voice inside your head making up an excuse that says, "what will others think? I can't do that, they'll laugh at me!" That other can be your parents, friends, colleagues or society, and you're using them as a reason for not going for what you want.

In today's episode we looking at taking the blame off others and taking personal responsibility for why YOU are holding yourself back. 

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Calling all energy (over) givers, this one is for you. I'm a sucker for over giving when I listen to my ego. It gets off on being needed and wanted, yet feels resentful towards others and scolds me for when I reach burnout and am forced to take time out. The days are gone of good old solid burnout but I can still over give to a point where I notice my behaviour change (not for the good). In this episode I share the mindset I have today to help keep my energy in check and strategies I have in place to protect me from my ego.

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There are many times a day, or week, where I feel the weight of the world and all its problems. When I feel it I feel sad, overwhelmed, angry and hopeless. I feel like a small ant that has no power to make a difference and think there's no point trying. However, I don't stay there too long, in fact, I can't. The anxiety is too much to bare so I choose to channel my fks where they matter. I believe the more conscious, considerate and committed people there are in the world, half the shit we see today that makes us cringe may not exist. I'm fighting for that. 

In today's episode I share how I make the mental shift from, "there is no point even trying", to, "come on Kat, channel your fks where they matter", and how I begin to take action. 

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Meet my mate Pete, a qualified Transpersonal Psychotherapist, Mental Health teacher and Counsellor at Elk & Me Therapies and Dispensary. He's a rock solid human being who I've had the privilege of working alongside back in the day, have experienced his work as a client and someone I get to call my friend.

He's worked in the mental health sector and the Healing Arts for over 15 years, specialising in transpersonal one on one therapy, couples therapy, adolescents and adults with mental health and drug alcohol issues. In today's episode we talk about emotional intellect, why it's hard (but also possible) to respond powerfully rather than react from pain, and how to allow all emotions to be there without needing to rationalise them.

Enjoy today's episode and get ready to take some seriously good nuggets away!

Check him out over at www.emotionalintellect.com.au and Elk & Me Therapies.

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Not gonna lie, Steve and I are nearly four years into our relationship and my sexual drive has shifted from when we first met. Now I know this is a normal thing but I wanted to know why for two reasons. One, my, "it's too late, I'm too tired, I'm about to get my period", and so on reasons were wearing Steve down. Second, I didn't want to be nearly 35 years old and dismissing my sexual energy. 

I got onto an incredible book by Esther Perel, Mating In Captivity. In my opinion this is a must read for everyone to appreciate the real reasons why it takes a lot of work, creativity and open communication in long term relationships for sex to be part of the relationship.

In this episode I'm sharing my journey and what I've discovered so far.

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Emily Osmond and I have shit tonne in common when it comes to creating a business and learning the sucky (but necessary) hard lessons along the way. Em quit her job to go full time in her business when she was 26 years old, with a mortgage to pay and no business plan (sounds like me legend). She knew her job wasn’t making her happy and believed she could create something of her own.

After what she calls a “wild ride on the entrepreneurial roller coaster of highs and lows”, she now runs a global business from her living room, hosts a podcast that is listened to in more than 70 countries, coaches hundreds of entrepreneurs inside her online programs, and loves the work that she gets to call her ‘job’.

Her mission is to help other women to create a business on their own terms that provides them with the income, lifestyle and freedom they desire. Em is an international marketing coach, top-ranking podcast host, speaker, interiors lover and black coffee drinker.

LINKS

Website: www.emilyosmond.com

Instagram: @emilyosmond

Podcast: The Emily Osmond Show

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To this day, giving ZEROFKS for the things that I "think" are important or matter (but aren't) isn't easy. I'm forever determining and asking myself, "is this really where I want my focus to be?" There's a part of us all that cares a lot about what others think, how we're going to be perceived and if we'll be accepted or rejected. And it's this part of us that tends to focus and project our own thoughts and fears onto others, taking zero self responsibility for the quality of our thinking. Every time I put out an episode, instagram post or create a new program, this part of me is 100% focused on what others will think and if they'll like it. The key to giving ZEROFKS is how much am I going to make that matter? How much energy and attention am I going to give that thought? Enjoy today's episode and let's see what comes up for you!

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Prior to being told I was wearing my mask wrong and that, "it doesn't work unless it's above your nose", I was in a really flat, emotional and anxious state. I walked out of my home for some fresh air, to enjoy the sun and clear my head. I've been struggling with my the changes in our home of becoming an almost full-time step-parent, homeschooling for what seems like forever, running my business and showing up and being in lockdown for so long. When this person corrected me, I was mid taking in three fresh breaths of air to ease the anxiety in my chest. I thought are you fking kidding me? Is this what we've come to?

Before correcting another person about their mask, consider the human behind the mask, because there is one there with a beating heart.

How are they doing?

Maybe they’ve lost their job.

Maybe they’re as over it as the rest of us.

Maybe they have asthma.

Maybe they just want some fresh fking air for a minute too.

Maybe they have something I don’t know about.

We’re now conditioned to correct people about mask wearing but please, don’t lose your sense of humanity in the process.

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If only upgrading our lives was as easy as pressing new software update on our iPhones. We'd all be pressing that button right before bed, effortlessly being upgraded without needing to do any work. What a dream! But alas, we're human and it doesn't work that way (boo). Why is it so darn hard to face the shit in our lives? To avoid communicating honestly withy your partner when things aren't good, having a hard chat with yourself when you're screwing up your health, or facing really your finances when they're all messed up? It may sees easier to avoid what is actually causing pain or suffering but that eventually catches up with you and bites you in the butt. 

Get this episode into your earballs for some tough love kick up the butt!

Instagram @kat.john

Website katjohn.com.au

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