Live Support Group: Relapse Preparedness - Just In Case

Four, 2-hour, live coaching sessions @ $200 ($50 per session), includes materials

Live group coaching with Coach Rae

Limited to 6 participants (minimum 3)

What if I find out he's looking at porn again? That's the question we'll answer in this month-long workshop. Together, we'll create an authentic, effective and proactive plan of action, developing an emergency response protocol to support you through the prospect of this painful possibility. In this workshop, Coach Rae will:

Help you to identify your anticipated feelings, fears, vulnerabilities and needs in response to a potential relapse.

Explore the purpose, viability and limitations of a Relapse Preparedness Plan (RPP), then coach you to develop your own relevant, reliable and individualized RPP.

Invite you to take an RPP Action Pledge, committing to use your RPP if needed, and to reach out to other workshop participants for relapse survival support.

For more details, email Coach Rae at [email protected]

What Is Relapse Preparedness When It Comes To Betrayal Trauma?

How Can We Heal From Betrayal Trauma While Also Preparing For The Worst Case Scenario?

For women who choose to stay in their relationships after discovering their guys’ compulsive sexual behavior, there’s an incalculable amount of emotional risk involved. When that emotional risk is met with ongoing incidents of sexual acting out, the wounds from a woman's initial discoveries often deepen, worsen and fundamentally destabilize her past, present and future efforts toward betrayal trauma recovery. I hear my clients describe this experience as:

ripping the scab off their wounds

pulling the rug out from under me

stabbing me in the back

taking me for granted

betraying me with a kiss

breaking my heart all over again

knocking me back to square one

How Did You Feel When You Found Out Your Husband Was Lying to You?

Relapse In Pornography Addiction Includes Going Back to Emotionally Abusive Behaviors As Well As Sexual Acting Out

How To Opt Out Of A Conversation With Your Emotionally Abusive Husband

As The Wife Of A Porn Addict, Do I Have to Expect Relapse?

By Preparing For A Relapse, Am I Asking For One?

Common Mistakes When Anticipating A Relapse

How To Avoid Triggers When Preparing For A Relapse & A Return of Narcissistic Behaviors

I honestly recommend this group for anyone who’s choosing, even one day at a time, to stay in a relationship wounded by sexual betrayal trauma. Going back to that analogy of Hurricane Sandy and emergency preparedness? I encourage women to explore what strategies could and would equip them in the event of a relapse—and once that’s done, you’ll likely find that your fear of a relapse subsides significantly—which frees you up to enjoy the beauty and benefits of your hard-fought recovery!

If you’ve had it with your husband’s pornography / sexual addiction and related behaviors, such as lies, infidelity, gaslighting, narcissistic behaviors, Betrayal Trauma Recovery is for you.

The consequences of your man's sexual addiction may cause you to experience fear, anxiety, insomnia, depression, despair, hopelessness, or other mental distress, financial difficulties, and abandonment. You are likely suffering from betrayal trauma and need help.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery professionals can help you establish emotional safety and peace in your home. You are not crazy, you don't have mental health problems. You are likely a victim of abuse and you need to heal.

If your husband has confessed his lies, compulsive sexual behaviors, and emotional abuse, promised to change, Betrayal Trauma Recovery APSATS Coaches will give you tools to know if the changes are real.

To read more, schedule a support call, or join a support group visit btr.org

Loving Yourself Fiercely: Healing Our Self Worth & Self Image

Tuesday, August 28, 2017

8:30PM - 10:00PM Eastern

Loving Yourself Fiercely is an interactive webinar lovingly crafted to:

1) Help you see where childhood messages, our culture, and the betrayals we’ve faced have damaged our self-worth and self-image.

2) Find inspiration to see yourself in a new way.

3) Teach you tools to combat this on-going struggle.  

“Perhaps, we should love ourselves so fiercely, that when others see us, they know exactly how it should be done.” – Rudy Francisco.   

In our culture, our self-worth is often derived from our self-image.  This is the exact opposite of how we find freedom, confidence, and peace from the endless striving to be something or someone else.

Add to that the damage done by the unrealistic representations pornography puts out there, or the comparison to affair / acting out partners, and most women dealing with betrayal trauma have had their self-worth and self-image shattered.

This workshop aims to help you see yourself differently, and empower you to love yourself fiercely – connecting you to a place of truth that, with work, will not easily be taken away from you ever again.   

In this workshop, we will:

Take a look at the negative messages we’ve come to believe about ourselves from childhood, our culture, our marriage/relationship, and the betrayal we’ve endured.

Identify the lies in these negative messages, and work to reframe them to reflect the truth about who we really are.

Work through a few tools to help us connect with our self-love, and craft mantras that will help us.

STAY connected to that self-love when the gremlins pop up and try to rob us of our peace and self-love.

If you’ve had it with your husband’s pornography / sexual addiction and related behaviors, such as lies, infidelity, gaslighting, narcissistic behaviors, Betrayal Trauma Recovery is for you.

The consequences of your man's sexual addiction may cause you to experience fear, anxiety, insomnia, depression, despair, hopelessness, or other mental distress, financial difficulties, and abandonment. You are likely suffering from betrayal trauma and need help.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery professionals can help you establish emotional safety and peace in your home. You are not crazy, you don't have mental health problems. You are likely a victim of abuse and you need to heal.

If your husband has confessed his lies, compulsive sexual behaviors, and emotional abuse, promised to change, Betrayal Trauma Recovery APSATS Coaches will give you tools to know if the changes are real.

To read more, schedule a support call, or join a support group visit btr.org

Some of the related behaviors of pornography addicts don't make sense,

unless you know what to look for.

Anne talks with Amy Kate about the chaos and horror of living with an

active pornography addict.

Join Coach Gaelyn as she walks beginners through the ground-zero basics of boundaries.

Read the entire transcription here: https://www.btr.org/podcast/boundaries-for-beginners

For full transcription visit https://www.btr.org/podcast/btr-club-for-betrayal-trauma-establish-safety-from-lies-gaslighting-narcissistic-abuse

Coach Gaelyn and Coach Sarah introduce Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group, and how it can help you.

How To Find Forgiveness After Betrayal

Anne, founder of Betrayal Trauma Recovery, started her podcast as part of her healing journey. Today, she says, “Even though my ex is still abusive, and I have to maintain the no-contact boundary, I feel freer and happier than I did when I started.”

Forgiving After Betrayal Is An Important Step Towards Healing

As difficult as the journey has been, Anne has finally found gratitude in her journey. She feels peace and hope. One of the things that has helped her to find that peace, hope and gratitude has been forgiveness.

Forgiveness isn’t always an easy thing to give, but it’s an important step in the healing process.

Forgiveness, once given, can have an extremely therapeutic effect. It can feel like an enormous weight is lifted off your shoulders.

“Forgiveness is the heart’s capacity to release its grasp on the pain of the past and free itself to go on.” -Jack Kornfield, author

This isn’t about forgiving the abuser. This isn’t about forgiving the pain that he’s caused you. This isn’t about forgiving the lies and abuse.

This is about forgiving yourself.

Often, we are so willing to have compassion and empathy for those that harm or offend us but find it very difficult to do the same for ourselves.

Most women in this situation don’t know what’s really been going on in their relationship.

Most women don’t know the extent of their husband’s addiction and acting out behaviors.

Most women don’t realize they’ve been abused.

Most women don’t know they’ve been traumatized.

It has nothing to do with how educated or wealthy they are.

It has nothing to do with how beautiful they are.

Addicts lie. They lie a lot, and they’re good at it.

They’re so good at it that, often, they believe their own lies.

People don’t know what they don’t know, and they operate on what they know.

Once D-day happens, whether it’s a discovery or a disclosure, a woman may start to ask herself, “Why didn’t I see it? Why didn’t I know? Why would he do that?” and many other “Why” questions.

The most painful of all those “Why” questions, however, is “Why wasn’t I enough?”

Of all these questions, this one causes the most pain and creates the most negative inner dialogue for a woman.

Many women start to think, “I should’ve been taller/shorter/thinner/fatter/stronger/weaker/less confident/more confident/more independent/less independent…” the list could go on.

Some women may go into trauma and not know it. They may have symptoms for years and not realize that’s what it is. For symptoms of betrayal trauma, please read here.

Some women may become someone they never wanted to become. They may not be present for their kids. They may keep a messy house. They may become “lazy” and constantly tired.

Then, one day, they find out that they’ve been in trauma all that time. It explains so much for them.

Through the trauma, there’s so much women can find to criticize and mentally beat themselves up for. For more information on betrayal trauma and what happens when we’re traumatized, please read here.

This makes forgiveness such a vital step in the healing process.

If you’ve had it with your husband’s pornography / sexual addiction and related behaviors, such as lies, infidelity, gaslighting, narcissistic behaviors, Betrayal Trauma Recovery is for you.

The consequences of your man's sexual addiction may cause you to experience fear, anxiety, insomnia, depression, despair, hopelessness, or other mental distress, financial difficulties, and abandonment.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery professionals can help you establish emotional safety and peace in your home.

If your husband has confessed his lies, compulsive sexual behaviors, and promised to change, Betrayal Trauma Recovery APSATS Coaches will give you tools to know if the changes are real.

On this 4th of July, I want to give my thanks for all of you, for being on this recovery journey with me. I feel more free, more happy even though my problems are the same. I still have serious financial problems. My ex is still abusive, so I have to maintain the no contact boundary with him.

I’m grateful for myself that I’ve been continuing my own work to recovery from the narcissistic abuse that I suffered as a result of my husband’s pornography addiction. I continued to do the right things, even when it was hard, and even when I didn’t feel like it. And now the peace and hope I feel is breathtaking. Doing this one step at a time, things get better.

APSATS Coaches Help Women Heal From The Pain Of Infidelity

I’m also grateful for the APSATS coaches that work for Betrayal Trauma Recovery. I interact with them everyday, and because of them and God, I’m feeling healed. I need to take a moment to celebrate that.

Rebuilding Trust In Yourself

Coach Sarah is starting a Betrayal & Boundaries group, specifically about how to set and hold healthy boundaries when you’re involved with a man who is a sex addict / pornography addict, and exhibits narcissistic traits like gaslighting and lying.

These spots go fast, so if you’re interested join right away.

Next week Coach Sarah, Coach Rae, and Coach Kim will be on the podcast to talk about BTR Coaching Club.

Why APSATS Coaching Is Your Best Option For Dealing With Your Husband’s Pornography Addiction, Gaslighting, & Abuse

I was recently APSATS trained, and I came away realizing that therapy is for pathological issues. Coaching is for women who don’t have anything wrong with them, like you. You are in a situation that is very difficult, with a man who has serious pathological issues, but you are reacting in normal ways to betrayal and abuse. But there is nothing wrong with you. You are just fine the way you are.

Your problems are situational, and our APSATS coaches can help you establish emotional, physical, and sexual safety in your life.

That’s why we use coaches - to help you deal with the situation that you’re in.

APSATS coaches are the best trained to do that. It’s a robust training and certification process that can take up to two years . . . read more at btr.org