You know those phases in life where you’re torn between building your dream and building a life with someone? This episode gets deep down into how avoidance shows up in men, what they are actually thinking when they pull back, and why so many people are chasing achievement to fill a void they don’t even see. I also share a personal story of how I stood firm in my boundaries and truth with an avoidant. Today is a giant journey through my brain on the intersection of validation, success, and finding true love.

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Let’s take you through the mind of an avoidant, a self-aware one at that. I’ll discuss why getting the ick might be a form of unconscious self-sabotage, why our society craves fake love, and how to better regulate and communicate as an avoidant. If you ever catch yourself missing someone who is not choosing you, let me teach you how to change the narrative and start attracting people who are actually available.

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Did you really do too much? ... This week, we will start with why our nervous system pushes us into anxious spirals and overthinking. I'll then give you a powerful tool to combat your anxiety and show you how to stay calm when dating feels uncertain. I'll guide you on how to maintain your peace while meeting new people, especially if you struggle with limerance. I'll also touch on the invisible string theory and questions around whether dating standards have gotten out of control.

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Chapters:

02:58 Limerance & Regulating Your Anxiety

34:00 Invisible String Theory

39:19 Are Dating Standards Getting Out of Control

46:27 How to Date Without Losing Yourself

It's episode 100, wow what a journey! Today I am going to share the 3 most important mindset shifts I've discovered as a coach. Are you ready to release control, kill perfectionism, and know the steps to building true confidence? I'll also share a few recent dating stories from swallowing my pride, choosing love over fear, and a wild story about ghosting and ex lovers.

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Dating is supposed to feel good, not confusing, not dismissive, not anxious. This week I talk about situations where ghosting might actually be necessary and why I have zero tolerance for poor communication. I'll share a great self-reflection exercise that reveals what drives you, what you fear, and where you place your worth, which will help you identify your attachments. I also tackle questions about how to know if you are emotionally ready for a relationship, how to handle dating a dismissive avoidant, and if there is anything you can do to help them see their own worth.

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Chapters

00:00 Zero Tolerance Policy

18:04 Self-Reflection Exercise

29:01 Dating & Nicotine

42:41What Makes Someone Emotionally Ready

58:29 Dating a Dismissive Avoidant

Have you ever been infatuated and start acting crazy? Well, do I have a story for you! I talk about my pattern of doing too much and how I am learning to slow down and trust myself. We’ll get into how you subconsciously communicate your worth, why being “too nice” too soon can kill attraction, and what it actually looks like to show up grounded and calm instead of overselling. Plus, I answer a listener’s question about whether people really change, why we chase the same patterns even years later, and what to do if you’re struggling with intimacy in avoidant relationships.

Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: ⁠⁠https://confidencechris.com/

Chapters

00:00 Handling Infatuation & Communicating Your Value Better

36:39 Can They Actually Change?

48:16 Avoidant Went and Dated Someone Else After Breakup

52:33 Physical Intimacy Issues with Avoidants

I just got back from a ten-day trip to New York that completely pulled me out of my routine. No TikToks, no structure, just late nights, new people, and letting go of control. I share stories from the trip such as extending my flight last minute, getting ghosted after being real, and trusting that the right people and moments always show up when you stop forcing. This is about choosing love over fear, presence over control, and freedom over validation.

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Are they really the next best thing, or are they just like everyone else? Today I had a new voice note coaching client who came to me spiraling and overthinking about her potential new boo. He was throwing everything at her: masculine energy, plans, good vibes, and all of a sudden, everything shifted. She gave me permission to share her question live on the podcast as well as my response. In this episode, I'll talk about what to do when your nervous system goes into overdrive, how to handle the fear of being too much or ruining it before it even starts, and what happens when you sleep with someone quickly and the attachment spikes. Let me help you stay confident in your dating process and decisions.

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In today's episode, I am going to share with you my truest love and deepest fear. It's an exercise that I am going to share with you to help you get to the root of your more controlling beliefs. I'll talk about how these beliefs have played out in my relationships and why I’ve tied so much of my self-worth to attention. I get into the dark side of empathy, how being nice isn’t the same as being authentic, and why so many of the things we think we’re doing out of love are actually driven by fear. I share stories from clients navigating back to friendship when they used to include benefits. I'll discuss how to sit with and handle old traumas while dating or trying to find new partners. If you’ve ever felt invisible, overlooked, or not chosen, this is for you.

Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: ⁠⁠https://confidencechris.com/

Chapters

00:00 Empathy vs Fear

16:01 Deepest Fear vs Deepest Love Exercise

35:54 Single So Long Now You're Avoidant

42:54 Managing Triggers With Someone New

Some endings aren't meant to be rewritten. In this episode, I get into why it’s so tough to let go and why “spinning the block” usually leads to more chaos. I'll discuss how to find emotionally equipped partners, what it means when a man asks you to hang out but never follows through, and the harsh reality of why holding onto "what used to be" keeps you stuck. If you’ve ever needed the truth about whether that spark is real or just a trauma bond, you are about to get it.

Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: ⁠⁠https://confidencechris.com/

Chapters

00:00 Waiting For Commitment

25:33 When They Spin the Block

32:45 How to Find Someone Healed

41:47 “I Want to See You” But No Action

48:34 Intense Spark or Trauma Bond?