Bridgett Blood is back — a year older, a year braver, and now specializing in the work underneath the work. She's traded a leap-of-faith move to Nashville for certifications in story work, narrative-focused trauma therapy, and Christian sexual health, all aimed at singles, daters, and engaged couples. This episode isn't really dating advice. It's about the thing beneath every relationship you'll ever have: you can't show up authentically in romance while you're disconnected from yourself. Bridgett, Glenn, and Phyllis dismantle the myth of "compatibility," name why doing love in psycholation is so costly, and get unusually honest about Glenn and Phyllis's own early marriage — the quiet, the roles nobody chose out loud, and what might have been different if they'd learned themselves sooner.

In this episode:

• Story work, and why what happened to you at six is still steering your cyclone at forty
• Why "stop making marriage the goal" is a healthier starting line than it sounds
• The compatibility myth — why two matching pieces of paper can't survive Wednesday
• Psycholation: doing romance, marriage, or sex alone, and why it's a Connection Codes red flag
• Self-contempt vs. self-hatred — and why the distinction changes everything
• Glenn and Phyllis's story: quiet compliance, unclaimed identity, and a decision that changed their marriage
• A 25-second case study: Glenn asking a restaurant to turn the music down
• Bridgett's issue-specific Core Emotion Wheel on her own story of harm and healing

About Bridgett Blood: Bridgett is a certified Connection Codes coach based in Nashville, also certified in Christian sexual health and narrative-focused trauma therapy. She works with Christian singles, daters, and engaged couples to help them build an honest, embodied relationship with their own story, identity, and sexuality.

Resources mentioned:

• The Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• Find a certified coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations
• Make Sense of Your Story by Adam Young
• The Deep Rooted Marriage by Dan Allender & Steve Call
• Bridgett online → BridgettBlood.com | Instagram → @BridgettBlood

In April, Laurel Simpson's husband was rushed to the hospital — and for ten days she didn't know if he would live. In this tender, remarkable conversation, Laurel walks Glenn and Phyllis through what it actually looks like to process Fear in real time when it won't stop coming. Not the tidy version where you feel it once and it passes — the version where Fear arrives wave after wave after wave, and you have no choice but to sit with it. What she discovered in that hospital room will change how you think about the emotion you've been taught to fight your whole life.

In this episode:

• Why Fear feels like it's "coming against you" — and what it's actually trying to do
• The moment Fear "held hands with Anger" so Laurel could advocate for her husband
• How Lonely sat with her on the nights she was too exhausted to keep going
• The near–panic-attack morning Phyllis walked her through the Core Emotion Wheel, one emotion at a time
• Why "the more I resisted her, the louder she got"
• Co-regulation and why you were never meant to do hard things alone
• What our kids actually need from us when we're afraid

About Laurel Simpson: Laurel is a certified Connection Coach specializing in trauma and nervous-system work, and she's the warm voice behind the Connection Codes inbox — if you've ever emailed [email protected], Laurel is the one who saw it. She lives in Canada, and she shares this story from the other side of one of the hardest seasons of her life.

Resources mentioned:

• The Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• Connect with a certified Connection Coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations

Work with Laurel: Laurel offers coaching for individuals and couples. Book a session with her directly → calendly.com/laurelsimpson

You can also reach her anytime through [email protected].

Greg and Missy didn't come to Connection Codes as experts — they came as a couple who almost didn't make it. Thirty years married, with a near-divorce and a two-year separation somewhere in the middle, they found the Core Emotion Wheel during the slow work of rebuilding. In this episode, Phyllis sits down with these longtime listeners (who emailed in after we invited friends onto the show) to talk about the quiet superpower underneath all of it: putting language to what you actually feel. They get into how the wheel gave their daughter, who has Down syndrome, words to be heard and seen; how they stopped fighting about things they secretly agreed on; how they're using the wheel situationally through a giant life transition; and how connection is what makes room for creativity in the first place — the idea behind Greg's brand-new book. Along the way, the conversation cracks open one of the most misunderstood emotions of all — Anger — and lands somewhere genuinely surprising.

In this episode:

• Why "result words" like overwhelmed, anxious, and upset keep us stuck — and how the core emotions give every brain a common language
• How the wheel gave their daughter language to be heard, seen, and felt
• Fighting about things you actually agree on — and the emotion hiding underneath
• Using the wheel situationally through a major transition: a move, a business relocation, a house sale falling through, a son changing schools
• Holding Joy and grief at the same time — and not rushing a kid out of his Sad
• Why processing emotion is the opposite of wallowing in it
• How conflict quietly steals creativity — and Greg's book, Created to Create
• Anger as a protector and a driver, not violence

About Greg & Missy: Greg and Missy have been married 30 years and first found Connection Codes through the Foundations course in 2021. Both are creatives by trade — Greg is an architect, Missy is an interior designer — and they've used the Core Emotion Wheel as a daily and situational tool with each other and with their two kids. Greg recently released his first book, Created to Create.

Resources mentioned:

• Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/cew
• Find a certified Connection Codes coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations
• Created to Create: How to Partner with God and Uncover Your Creative Destiny by Greg — available on Amazon
• Want to be a guest on the podcast? Email us → [email protected]

What if your body has been keeping a record your mind never agreed to? In this episode, Glenn and Phyllis sit down with John Kilmer — occupational therapist, life coach, and newly certified Connection Coder — for a conversation about how emotion lives in the body long after the moment has passed. John shares what it was like to grow up between countries, why a hospital stay at 18 months still shapes how he trusts, and how his five-year-old recently named his own fear and shame out loud instead of hiding it. Phyllis opens up about coming to the U.S. as a child who couldn't yet read or write English, and learning to disappear. Together they unpack somatic work, the nervous system, and why simply being present in our own bodies can feel terrifying — and freeing.

In this episode:

• How a five-year-old used the Core Emotion Wheel to self-disclose instead of hide
• Why "the issues are in the tissues" — and what somatic work actually means
• The 90-second life of an emotion, and what happens when we cut it short
• Growing up as a "third culture kid" and the quiet grief no one named
• Why looking into another person's eyes for four minutes changes us biochemically
• Loneliness, isolated mothers, and the tools we were never given
• John walks the Core Emotion Wheel live to close the episode

About John Kilmer: John is an occupational therapist and life coach in rural Washington State, trained in somatic and polyvagal-informed approaches to trauma. A recent graduate of the School of Connection and a newly certified Connection Codes coach, he brings a deep love of embodiment work and a story shaped by years living in Lebanon and Kenya.

Resources mentioned:

• The Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• Find a certified Connection Codes coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Reach John directly → [email protected]

Check out our new website → connectioncodes.co

And be on the lookout — our new community is coming soon. You won't want to miss it.

A trigger isn't an overreaction — it's stored pain asking to come out. From a rainforest compound in Costa Rica (howler monkeys included), Glenn and Phyllis unpack what's really happening when someone gets "triggered," why the brain can't tell the difference between a stubbed toe and an old wound, and why our instinct to calm people down is doing the opposite of helping. Phyllis shares the morning she walked away from a conversation feeling "off" — and turned back around. Glenn shares why he Oooed the stranger screaming at him through a car window. This is an honest, sometimes raw conversation about making space for pain instead of putting the lid back on the jar.

In this episode:

• The working definition of trauma: a current emotional response based on a past event
• Why "just choose joy / stop choosing pain" is something we'd never say to a six-month-old
• The four Phrases — and when not to use the second one
• Why calming someone down tamps the emotion into the body instead of out of it
• The jar metaphor: holding sacred space vs. snapping the lid back on
• Phyllis crying in front of a room of strangers in Switzerland — and why it connected them
• A live, issue-specific Core Emotion Wheel on one of their most intimate, tender topics

Resources mentioned:

• Free Core Emotion Wheel → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• Find a certified coach (book a session) → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Send us your questions for the show → [email protected]

Glenn and Phyllis at the mic. They open with a goodbye on a train platform in Switzerland — and the tears Phyllis chose not to swallow — then go straight into what crying actually does inside your body, and what it quietly costs you when you don't. Glenn unpacks the science (your tears are carrying stress chemistry out of you, and blocking them keeps it in), and Phyllis shares the grief that went underground the year her mom died, when she told herself she "didn't have time to be sad." This is an episode about permission — to feel it, to let it flow, and to be the kind of person who can sit with someone else's tears without trying to fix them.

In this episode:

• Why "boys don't cry" may be one of the most damaging things our culture teaches — and why Glenn says it's like telling someone not to exhale
• What's actually inside an emotional tear, and why blocking it leaves stress trapped in your body
• Phyllis's story of not crying when her mom died — and the grief that went underground for years
• The power of the Ooh: what to do instead of reaching for the tissue box
• Why offering a Kleenex can quietly tell someone their tears are a problem
• A live Core Emotion Wheel on tears — Glenn and Phyllis each model it in real time
• "If you love deeply, you hurt deeply. And if you don't, it's much, much worse."

Resources mentioned:

• The free Core Emotion Wheel → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• The blog this episode is built on, "The Cost of Not Crying" → blog.connectioncodes.co/posts/the-cost-of-not-crying
• The tears carousel → on Instagram @connectioncodes
• The Connection Codes Community launches September 2026 — grab the Wheel to be first in line → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew

After four years, hundreds of episodes, and countless wheels, Tera Wages is stepping down from her role as host of the Connection Codes podcast. In this special two-part episode, Dr. Glenn and Phyllis open with a heartfelt tribute from Costa Rica, and then Tera takes the mic solo from Spain — where she's hiking the Camino de Santiago for her 40th birthday — to share what the Connection Codes has given her, the three things she's carrying forward for the rest of her life, and one final Core Emotion Wheel with the community she's loved.

In this episode:

• Dr. Glenn and Phyllis honor Tera and Wes's four years of partnership in building Connection Codes
• The story of the front porch swing — and the moment Wes put two unplugged mics in front of Glenn and Phyllis that launched the podcast
• Why Tera knew it was time, and what's next for the podcast under Glenn and Phyllis
• Three things the Connection Codes has built into Tera that she'll carry forever: the power of the Wheel, the necessity of community, and the refusal to stay stuck
• A wheel on the phone with Wes, mid-Camino — and the door it opened
• Pilgrims, phones, and the loneliness epidemic
• Tera's final on-mic Core Emotion Wheel: sad, guilt, shame, lonely, hurt, anger, joy

Resources mentioned:

• Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/wheel

• Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations

Michelle and Kurt have been married since 1999 — and they're the first to tell you that "together a long time" isn't the same as "doing well." In this conversation, they share the moment Connection Codes stopped being a book on their shelf and started reorganizing their marriage. Michelle, a relationship coach herself, names something most of us have felt but never said out loud: that all the colorful language and long paragraphs were just a means to one simple end — to matter. This is a real-time look at what happens when a long-married couple stops trying to be understood and starts letting themselves be regarded.

In this episode:

• Why "more emotion words" can actually make you more dysregulated (and what to do instead)
• The "two junkyard dogs" season — and how Connection Codes opened a door out of it
• Why repeating back what your partner said keeps missing the point
• The dam break: why things often feel worse before they get better
• Trauma isn't the event — it's that no one regarded you afterward
• Befriending shame and guilt as "text messages from God"
• Michelle's metaphor: emotion as a corked bottle of rubbing alcohol

About Michelle & Kurt: Michelle and kurt live in Seattle and have been married since July 1999. Michelle is a relationship coach who now integrates the Connection Codes framework into her work with clients. They found Connection Codes through Zach Watson and went on to complete the coaching cohort.

Resources mentioned:

• The Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/wheel
• Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations
• Certified Coaches Directory → connectioncodes.co/coaches

Susan and Sean McGinnis drove two hours to a live Connection Codes event in Austin knowing almost nothing about the framework — just desperate to save a 30-year marriage that kept circling the same argument, every three or four months, for three decades. In this episode, they walk Glenn and Phyllis through what they now call "the 30-year fight": a cycle of hurt, still face, shutdown, and silence that neither of them could name — until they finally had the tools to. From Sean's breakthrough that his so-called temper was actually unprocessed hurt, to Susan crying in the hallway Friday night after hearing about identity for the very first time, this is a story about two people who almost didn't make it — and chose to go all in.

Key topics covered:

• How Susan and Sean discovered Connection Codes almost by accident after exhausting other approaches
• The mechanics of "the 30-year fight" — a cyclical argument that lasted days and weeks and always ended the same way
• Still face as a survival strategy, not just a research concept — and what it cost them both
• Secondary emotions: how Sean's hurt hid as anger for 30 years without either of them knowing it
• The identity teaching that broke Susan in the hallway on the very first night of the Austin seminar
• Their morning practice: 4 miles, two processing floors, and how they start every day emptied out
• A live Core Emotion Wheel exercise — both Susan and Sean walk through all 8 emotions about "the 30-year fight"

Guest Bio:Susan and Sean McGinnis are a Texas-based couple married 30 years, now certified Connection Codes coaches. Susan works with horses; Sean is semi-retired from a career in construction and trading. They went through the CC Foundations course and coaching cohort together and are passionate about giving other couples the hope they almost ran out of.

CTAs:

• Download the Core Emotion Wheel free → connectioncodes.co/wheel
• Work with a certified CC coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches
• Start with the Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations

Bob and Jen Bevan are a married couple from Cleveland, Tennessee — 29 years in, two kids, three grandchildren, and owners of Witt's Frozen Custard. What they didn't expect was that the path to real connection would run straight through the Core Emotion Wheel. In this episode, Bob and Jen share what it was like to enter Connection Codes from very different starting points — Jen as a certified coach, Bob as a self-described "highly recovering codependent" — and what happened when they finally had language for what was breaking them apart. From Jen's raw confession that shame felt like a knife telling her she couldn't exist, to Bob's discovery that he hadn't been able to access "lonely" for decades, this episode is for every couple who wanted to love each other better but didn't know how.

Key topics covered:

• Why one partner going first in Connection Codes doesn't have to mean the other gets left behind
• What codependency does to your ability to feel your own emotions
• Shame as a barrier to coming out of hiding — especially in church culture
• The difference between drowning in emotion and processing it
• Bob's story of doing the Core Emotion Wheel with his son after a major fight — for the very first time
• Glenn's "relationships require depth, not time" reframe
• Jen's breakthrough: "To feel is to connect — with people, and with God"

Guest bio:Bob and Jen Bevan are based in Cleveland, Tennessee, where they run Witt's Frozen Custard and stay deeply embedded in church community. Bob brings 25 years of pastoral experience and a psychology degree; Jen is a Connection Codes certified coach. Together, they're proof that the tools work — even when you come in from two totally different directions.

Resources & CTAs:

• 🎡 Free Core Emotion Wheel → connectioncodes.co/wheel
• 🏅 Certified Coaching → connectioncodes.co/coaches
• 📚 Foundations Masterclass → connectioncodes.co/foundations