► Join Our Skool-Community: https://understandable.net/join/ (Ad)

Are you struggling with the same recurring triggers in your relationships for years?

You feel that your partner is not showing their emotions and is holding back, or your partner is too close and doesn't have their own social life.

Now, in order to fix this, have you seen couples counselor after couples counselor and yet hardly make any progress?

Well, then classical therapy is probably not the solution to your problems.

But, there is an alternative, which I see popping up more and more often. And it’s called shadow work.

Today, I will show you why classic couples counselling is 1) not the right approach for many people who have those conflicts. And 2) is often not even promoting healing of attachment problems.

Today's episode is like peeling an onion.

We will slowly bring the blind spots of anxious and avoidant attachment to light.

And in the end, you will be left with a clear understanding of the core, which displays the actual patterns that are the hidden cause of your triggers.

► Links and Resources:

4 Attachment Styles: https://youtu.be/1S-YK065XLA?si=3srOnSywlQezz1uF

Shadow Work on Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/Jung/comments/gnoo76/the_opposite_of_the_shadow/

The Pleasure Principle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pleasure_principle_(psychology)

Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques: https://understandable.net/book/ (Ad)

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠

Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6

Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905

Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:45 Why Are Anxious And Avoidant Attachment Styles So Problematic?

06:45 What Is Shadow Work?

13:04 The Anxious Shadow

14:55 The Avoidant Shadow

19:03 Why Do Anxiously And Avoidant Attached People Attract Each Other?

32:18 Shadow Work To Heal

39:30 Solutions To Start Healing Now

40:49 Final Thoughts

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about CPTSD & attachment theory for highly sensitive & neurodivergent people.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.