Hosted by Dr. Sarah Hensley, Specialized Social Psychologist, Attachment Theory Expert, and Founder & CEO of The Love Doc Relationship Coaching Services with Co-host Raina Butcher, Owner/CEO of Joyful Consulting, LLC.
Welcome to "The Love Doc Podcast" where Host Dr. Sarah Hensley and her co-host Raina Butcher dive deep into the intricacies of love, attraction, attachment, relationships, and self-awareness. Dr. Hensley brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to help listeners navigate the complexities of modern romance. In each episode, Dr. Hensley tackles burning questions about love, relationships, and the mind’s complexities, drawing from her psychological research, real-life experiences, and her own individual expertise, to provide insightful perspectives and practical advice.
Episode 48: The Vagus Nerve
In this powerful and informative episode, Dr. Sarah Hensley unpacks one of the most essential—yet often overlooked—players in our healing journey: the vagus nerve. As a social psychologist and attachment expert, Dr. Hensley explains how the vagus nerve functions as the primary communication superhighway between the brain and body, deeply influencing our emotional regulation, sense of safety, and ability to connect with others. She breaks down the science in an accessible, real-world way—helping listeners understand why a dysregulated nervous system keeps them stuck in survival mode, attracting unhealthy patterns and perpetuating attachment wounds.
Dr. Hensley dives into the role the vagus nerve plays in attachment and trauma, especially for those with insecure styles like anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. When we’ve experienced relational trauma—whether through emotional neglect, inconsistency, or outright betrayal—our nervous system becomes hypervigilant. The vagus nerve responds by defaulting into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn states, often without us realizing it. That’s why you might feel a “gut instinct” to run or shut down in the presence of intimacy, or why calmness can feel foreign after years of chaos. Dr. Hensley explains how we cannot simply “think” our way into secure attachment—we must regulate our way there, starting with the body.
Throughout the episode, listeners are guided through practical, research-backed ways to tone and stimulate the vagus nerve. From cold exposure and deep diaphragmatic breathing to humming, prayer, laughter, and safe eye contact—Dr. Hensley outlines exercises that create real shifts in the nervous system over time. She emphasizes that healing is not a linear path of “just letting go” or “getting over it”—it’s a deep reconnection with your body’s felt sense of safety. She also shares how vagal tone is essential in being able to pause, reflect, and choose differently in moments of relational trigger—rather than spiraling into panic, protest, or withdrawal. If you’ve ever wondered why healing feels so hard—or how to finally feel safe in love—this episode is your science-meets-soul roadmap.
Tune in to "The Love Doc Podcast" every Tuesday morning for candid conversations, expert guidance, and a deeper understanding of life, love and relationships in the modern world. To see all of Dr. Hensley’s services please visit the links below and follow her on social media.
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