One of the most difficult tasks in relationships is to maintain our sense of self...to not loose our self in relationship. This can be even more challenging during times of conflict, stress and uncertainty. And especially true when our partner is pressuring us to be something different or when we fear their reaction and ultimately a loss of approval and love. 

(Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)

 

In this episode, Dr. Jessica Higgins discusses: 

• How important it is to work on becoming differentiated in relationship.
• The fallout of not maintaining a solid sense of self. 
• What it looks like when couples get stuck in emotional fusion and gridlock. 
• Dr. David Schnarch's Four Points Of Balance: Solid Flexible Self, Quiet Mind - Calm Heart, Grounded Responding, and Meaningful Endurance. 
• How differentiation relates to our passion, sexual desire and sexual intimacy.  

 "A solid sense of self develops from confronting yourself, challenging yourself to do what's right, and earning your own self-respect. It develops from inside you rather than from internalizing what's around you." by Dr. David Schnarch

 

Mentioned: 

• Shifting Criticism into Connected Communication – Free Guide
• Crucible Institute Dr. David Schnarch (website)
• Intimacy & Desire, by Dr. David Schnarch (book)
• Resurrecting Sex, by Dr. David Schnarch (book)
• Passionate Marriage, by Dr. David Schnarch (book)
• ERP 110: HOW TO MANAGE TWO MAJORLY CONFLICTING NEEDS IN RELATIONSHIP (podcast)
• ERP 234: How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy – Part two (podcast)
• ERP 233: How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy – Part One (podcast)
• ERP 223: How To Deal With Difficult Emotions – Part One (podcast)
• ERP 224: How To Deal With Difficult Emotions – Part Two (podcast)
• Dr. Susan Johnson's website

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  

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Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 

Website: drjessicahiggins.com  

Email: [email protected]

 

 

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 

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Thank you!  

If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me.