Ep. 135 Ever stop and ask yourself why you do things the way you do? From how you fold your laundry to how you handle your relationshipsāso much of what we do is inherited thinking. In this episode of Healthy Illness, host Coach Kelly Marie dives into the question we all need to ask more often: āWho said that?ā
Through a heartfelt story about a family recipe passed down through generations, Kelly unpacks how old habits and beliefsāwhether from family, culture, or social mediaācan quietly dictate our decisions.
Using her āSays Whoā tool, she shares four simple but transformative questions to help you pause, reflect, and reclaim your own way of doing things.
The āPot Roast Principleā: how family traditions reveal unconscious conditioning
4 questions to challenge automatic thoughts and actions
Why āthis is how itās always been doneā can block personal growth
How to choose methods, routines, and mindsets that actually serve you
Permission to rewrite your own rulesāwith compassion and humor
š¬ Try the Says Who Tool:
1ļøā£ Who said I have to do it this way?
2ļøā£ Why am I doing it this way?
3ļøā£ How can I do this in a way thatās best for me?
4ļøā£ Is this new way better, or can I think of another way to do it?
Need Support? If youāre in need of mental health resources:
Dial 211 for local community and support services
Call or text 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (24/7 confidential help in the U.S.)
šļø Connect with the Show:
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Share this episode with someone whoās ready to start doing things their way š
0:00 Welcome to Healthy Illness
0:51 The Pot Roast Story That Started It All
2:36 Why Do We Keep Doing Things the Same Way?
3:44 From Bike Rides to Mental Shifts
4:33 Introducing the Says Who Tool
5:00 Who Said I Have to Do It This Way?
5:31 Why Am I Doing It This Way?
6:00 How Can I Do This in a Way Thatās Best for Me?
6:56 Is This New Way Betterāor Not?
8:03 Why Challenging Family Traditions Feels Hard
10:00 What the Pot Roast Teaches Us About Growth
11:40 Honoring the Past While Doing What Works for You
12:44 Your Way Is the Right Way
13:49 The Four Questions Recap
14:20 Mental Health Resources You Can Use
15:02 Final Thoughts: Do What Works Best for You
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