High-conflict divorce isn’t just a legal process—it can feel like daily psychological pressure. In this episode of Healthy Mind, Healthy Life, hosted by Avik (with Sana filling in), we talk about what it really takes to stay grounded when conflict keeps coming and your emotional bandwidth is already stretched thin.
This conversation is for parents navigating custody stress, courtroom anxiety, and the fear of “messing up” their kids emotionally. Guest Alex Dane shares lived, practical strategies for staying steady, protecting credibility, and separating parenting from legal warfare—so survival can become a path back to clarity and self-trust.
About the Guest:
Alex Dane is a father, strategist, and survivor of the family court system. He’s the author of How to Win Your Divorce and The High Conflict Playbook (an Amazon #1 bestseller), sharing tools rooted in lived experience.
Episode Chapter:
00:05:03 — Why high-conflict divorce feels like psychological warfare
00:07:25 — “Least brain power, biggest decisions”: what nobody prepares you for
00:10:47 — Accepting the system is unfair and building a strategy anyway
00:12:06 — “Best interest of the child” vs. what the system rewards
00:13:45 — Using anger, anxiety, and grief without letting them control you
00:19:58 — Separating legal battle from parenting time: the “two worlds” approach
00:26:16 — Does “winning” language escalate conflict? A grounded reframing
Key Takeaways:
Accept early when collaboration isn’t possible—then shift into strategy, not denial
Treat strong emotions as signals and fuel, but process them safely outside court settings
Protect your credibility: calm, clear communication often matters more than perfect facts
Create a “transition ritual” between legal work and parenting (pause, reset, support call)
Journal the inner journey so anger doesn’t become your long-term identity
Keep kids out of adult processing—use external supports so children don’t become emotional caretakers
How to Connect With the Guest:
Substack: https://howtowinyourdivorce.substack.com/
Book: High Conflict Playbook by Alex Dane on Amazon
http://www.howtowinyourdivorce.com/ - Sign up for the waitlist for presales for How To Win Your Divorce and get a Free chapter and divorce checklist.If you’re in emotional distress or feeling unsafe right now
Emergency services (local): Call your local emergency number immediately.
If you’re in the U.S. or Canada: 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline — call/text/chat)
If you’re in the U.K. & ROI: Samaritans 116 123
If you’re in Australia: Lifeline 13 11 14
If you’re in India: AASRA +91 22 2754 6669
Find a helpline in your country (global directory)
International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP): “Find a Helpline” directory
Befrienders Worldwide: global crisis support directory
Want to be a guest on Healthy Mind, Healthy Life? DM on PM - Send me a message on PodMatch
DM Me Here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/avik
Disclaimer: This video is for educational and informational purposes only. The views expressed are the personal opinions of the guest and do not reflect the views of the host or Healthy Mind By Avik™️. We do not intend to harm, defame, or discredit any person, organization, brand, product, country, or profession mentioned. All third-party media used remain the property of their respective owners and are used under fair use for informational purposes. By watching, you acknowledge and accept this disclaimer.
Healthy Mind By Avik™️ is a global platform redefining mental health as a necessity, not a luxury. Born during the pandemic, it’s become a sanctuary for healing, growth, and mindful living. Hosted by Avik Chakraborty, storyteller, survivor, and wellness advocate.
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