By Hannah Brooks
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The podcast currently has 178 episodes available.
172 If there was one thing I could shout out from the rooftops right now to help all intimate relationships –and really all of humankind and our very planet– what I share in this episode would be it. It is that important.
Have you ever felt a sense of your spouse being “against” you, almost like they’re an enemy, a nemesis, a “bad guy” at moments, if not much of the time?
If so, you are FAR from alone. So many of my clients have told me that they feel that way, even if it is only subtle. And the amount of division people are experiencing in general is at a super high level in so many realms. And, of course, one of them is between intimate partners.
Even in this most intimate and sacred of a relationship, it's all too easy to fall into this sense of being against each other. And as our hearts start to feel hardened to them, it’s like we lose touch with the very tender, real, full of feeling human we fell in love with. They become less 3 dimensional, less human.
But what's really going on is that we lose connection with the part of ourselves that can connect.
This is a very common phenomenon, even in relationships that start out great. And it is a prelude to further disintegration of love– and even divorce.
Listen in to prevent this oh-so-common experience from slowly sucking your relationship of love and connection.
You will learn:
....so you can connect back to the part of you that CAN connect so beautiful and fully–and STAY connected to it.
SHOW NOTES:
Learn all about Foundations of Emotional Well-Being Course; The Root Of A Better Relationship here. And join here.
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As a sensitive or deep feeling person, your nervous system is more reactive. This matters. Because, importantly, your nervous system is the foundation of not just your emotional well-being, but also your relationships well-being— or it’s lack of well-being!
A chronically overstimulated, stressed out nervous system (which, let's face it, most of us have in our modern world, especially as HSPs) is a loving relationship's biggest enemy.
And, so long as your nervous system stays that way, you’re going to have a much harder time in your relationship in every way. You’ll be like a garden without nourished soil: wilting, fruitless, fried, fragile, and dried out.
Listen in to this bonus episode where I announce a very special opportunity for you to break free of reactivity in life and love at the most foundational level, and build a solid foundation of emotional well-being (that grounded safety and nourishing supportiveness that are the very roots of a deeply loving marriage), so you can:
Listen in to learn more about how to build the best foundation for a great relationship to grow from.
SHOW NOTES:
Learn all about Foundations of Emotional Well-Being Course; The Root Of A Better Relationship here. And join here.
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171 If you've ever felt AT ALL uncomfortable to express yourself in any way in your relationship, this episode is for you.
Because, even if you want a loving affectionate marriage, a weird thing may happen that I’ve seen again and again with women I've worked with (and I’ve done it myself, too!) :
You may edit your loving impulses, stop yourself from expressing in certain ways the love you have for your partner, out of fear of how it will be received.
OR you may have a deep truth to share, but you hold back because it may be too uncomfortable.
Either way, by editing yourself like this, you end up feeling helpless to make your marriage more connected and loving, and dimming your power to create a culture of deep positivity and supportiveness with your spouse.
In this episode, you will learn why we do this, what it looks like (you may be doing it without realizing it!), what surprising and wonderful things often happen when you don't do it, and 3 keys to stop overriding your own truth and self-expression in your marriage.
Listen in so as to no longer diminish some of the most incredible parts of you–and so you can pave the way for the deepest connection, loving intimacy, and trust to grow between you and your partner.
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage so much more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. When you sign up by mid-November, 2024, as a BONUS you will also get the LIVE Foundations of Emotional Well-Being Course; The Root Of A Better Relationship. It all starts by filling out this form.
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170 If you have any chance of having a great –or even just a decent– marriage, there will inevitably be times in your relationship that you need to take a look at your self and how you are approaching your relationship. To self-reflect and take ownership of the ways you are contributing to a less-than-great relationship.
Even if you know how essential this is for making positive changes and having lasting love, it can still, unfortunately, feel painful–if you approach it the way so many people do.
Luckily, I have found a way to take the pain out of facing all this. It can even feel good to look at those sticky, unskillful, or not-so-pretty patterns we fall into…with the right attitude and a good dose of self-support. (I personally find it thrilling!)
I want to share how with you today in this episode, broken down into 7 specific tips.
So listen in so that you no longer avoid doing –even just a little– this extra essential relationship improving meta skill and so you easily can make the loving changes on your end that will allow you to steer your marriage in a much more loving and connected direction.
Ready to feel so much more connected and loving with yourself-- and proud of yourself, too? Listen in.
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage so much more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. When you sign up by mid November, 2024, you will also get, as a BONUS, the LIVE Foundations of Emotional Well-being Course. It all starts by filling out this form.
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169 This is the first in a re-boot of some of the most essential episodes of the podcast that I will be releasing occasionally. Whether you’re newer to the podcast, or if you’ve listened to every episode, this one is a must listen (or re-listen).
Because often, as humans, we go about trying to improve our marriage backwards: we're more focused on changing our partner than changing ourselves.
But focusing on your spouse isn’t where you pack the most punch for actual change!
There is a more effective, easier, and more rewarding approach to improving your marriage, where you actually have powerful influence to have the loving, connected, supportive marriage you want with your husband.
It entails bringing your focus back to YOURSELF, by answering this essential question: “Who do I want to be in my relationship?”. And then centering your focus on becoming her.
This will get way better results in your marriage.
In this updated episode, we look at what it means to be who you want to be and WHY focusing on this is so effective when we want to improve our love lives.
I illustrate this with an example of a challenge in my own marriage and the difference in results I get when I'm focusing on my husband improving, versus stepping in to being who I really want to be, instead.
Then I help you define for yourself who you want to be.
Creating this clear vision for yourself is essential in order to actually take that journey of becoming her. Once you take this step you will be on the way to truly making changes by leaps and bounds in your marriage.
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. When you sign up by mid November, 2024, you will also get, as a BONUS, the LIVE Foundations of Emotional Well-being Course. It all starts by filling out this form.
ENJOYING THE SHOW?
The connection and closeness we so deeply want with our partner can dissipate for a variety of reasons, but often it comes from a slow hardening of our hearts towards our spouse in response to the arguments, the many moments of irritation, or the mistakes we feel they are making, and the disappointment we feel from it all.
If that resonates at all (or you are simply tired of feeling disconnected with your partner), this story-and-metaphor-filled episode is an absolute must-listen for you.
To create more of the deep intimacy and connection you truly want, it’s essential to stop this slow closing of your heart. Because it is cutting you off from love and making the closeness you crave ever elusive.
It starts with recognizing that this isn’t simply because of what’s been happening recently between you, but rather because of what I am calling “emotional vitamins” that you did not get in your younger years, which have led you to “over-protect” your tender heart when you don't get the love you need from your spouse.
It’s the case for most of us. But it can absolutely be changed now. You've just got to "take" the right "vitamins"!
Listen in to this episode to hear all about why our hearts slowly harden, and what you can do today and beyond to “take” the Emotional Vitamins you need to heal your heart and make available so much more of the love, connection, and intimacy you want between you and your significant other, so you can really FEEL it between you.
SHOW NOTES:
LAST CHANCE to join the special event that's been shown to generate a lot more closeness and connection in other highly sensitive women's intimate relationship, the CLOSER TO YOUR HUSBAND IN 7 DAYS CHALLENGE , for only $24! We start Tuesday, October 15th. Learn more and enroll now here.
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167 You want to look forward to your life with your significant other into the future. Imaging a bright future with each other is part of what keeps a relationship vibrant and alive in the present.
An important (and sometimes overlooked) piece of that is spending time dreaming into that future together with your spouse. Sharing and supportively working towards both your personal dreams and your dreams for your relationship will not just be super connecting, but it will bring excitement, fun, and so much fulfillment into your lives together.
Dreaming together can be like glue that keeps you moving side by side into a bright looking future. There really isn't a better way to honor who each of you are, and feel on the same team. Plus, it's HOW you make cool things happen!
Sadly, I’ve found that this important element of a marriage slips to the wayside in many marriages, to the detriment of both partners. So join me today to hear:
…so you can feel a sense of truly looking forward to your future with your partner by your side, as you build, together, a life you both love.
SHOW NOTES:
The popular Closer To Your Husband in 7 Days Challenge is back, updated, and better than ever! We start October 15th. Learn more and enroll now here.
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Many women I talk to feel as though their husband doesn't contribute enough domestically, like with the household chores like dishes, laundry, etc, or with the kids.
If that is going on at all for you, you probably feel resentful about it, and a sense of burden at having to do the lion's share of the domestic load. Who wouldn’t?!
This episode will change that, and help you get your partner to contribute more domestically.
You see, there is a common pattern that many couples fall into where one partner is taking on a lot more than the other person in terms of taking care of domestic things. And it is rarely just one person's fault.
There is a very common dynamic, one that both partners are complicit in, that is the cause of this in most cases: what I call the overfunctioning/underfunctioning dynamic.
In this episode you will learn:
. . .so you can get the help you deserve around your home and your spouse can feel like a valued contributor he ultimately wants to be deep down.
With stories and tangible action steps, you will walk away from this episode with a very practical plan to finally feel like the real domestic and romantic team in life you want to be with your significant other.
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. When you sign up by late November, 2024, you will also get, as a BONUS, the LIVE Foundations of Emotional Well-being Course. It all starts by filling out this form.
ENJOYING THE SHOW?
165 If you are tired, as so many women–and especially highly sensitive women—are these days, then it IS affecting your relationship – for the worse.
When we are tired, depleted, or burnt out, we HSPs tend to feel especially burdened, irritable and even resentful.
And unfortunately it is just so easy to get tired, depleted or burnt out in our modern lives with all the societal and real-life pressures. And you likely feel you have to just keep go-go-going. Especially if you are a mom or have a full time job (or both!).
If any of this is rigging a bell, please listen to this episode. Because you deserve to feel good in your life and relationship!
And I want to give you deep permission to rest. Listen in to hear why, how, and what that looks like. And take up my loving little challenge for you this week.
You’ll be on track to lose the exhaustion, the irritability, and even the sense of ongoing burden and resentment, and start replacing it all with a sense of nourishment and vitality. This is essential listening for all highly sensitive people.
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. Get started by filling out this form.
ENJOYING THE SHOW?
164 All marriages have ups and downs. It's in large part how you handle the downs that determines the overall quality of your relationship, and whether it grows more deeply loving and stays that way, or it disintegrates.
In this episode I candidly share how I recently applied my own coaching teachings to my own marriage during one of those harder times (when I was feeling like my husband wasn't supporting or caring for me well), and how I coached myself into feeling not just supported again, but even cherished.
As vulnerable as this is to share with you, I really wanted you to be able to see that even people with skills like mine go through harder times, and that instead of that being something to weaken your marriage, it is an opportunity for more growth, both personal and as a couple–WHEN you apply the coaching (and self coaching) I teach you and my clients.
You’ll not only hear the exact process I went through, but also how I dealt with resistance to doing my end of the work, how I took ownership over the hard emotions I was feeling, and how I shed the anger and hurt and began to feel loved and supported again–in just 10 or 15 minutes of my time! – so you can learn from me and even use this same process yourself.
I truly want you to be able to know just how to move out of those inevitable harder times in your marriage and get back to the love, connection and mutual supportiveness you cherish, so you can feel more fulfilled and secure, and keep evolving in the best ways both personally and as a couple. So listen in!
SHOW NOTES:
Join Hannah for 4 months of private 1:1 Marriage Coaching, and get her deep, super individualized support to make your marriage more full of security, connection, love, and mutual support than ever. Get started by filling out this form.
ENJOYING THE SHOW?
The podcast currently has 178 episodes available.
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