It Takes A Village

How to help your child manage anxiety


Listen Later

Parents can help their teenage children avoid patterns of emotional overreaction, says psychologist Michael Hawton. His new book The Anxiety Coach is a guide for parents on how to help young people manage their emotions and develop resilience.

Parents can guide their teenage children away from patterns of emotional overreaction, says psychologist Michael Hawton.

His new book The Anxiety Coach is a guide for helping young people manage their emotions and develop resilience.

"We need to give kids skills to overcome life's challenges," he tells Kathryn Ryan.

Listen to the interview

Michael Hawton is the founder of Parentshop - a resource hub for parents, educators and child family specialists.

Human brains haven't significantly changed in the last 25 years so today's high levels of adolescent anxiety seem to come from our environment, Hawton tells Kathryn Ryan.

Kids don't get as much sleep as they used to, and often not as much as they need. They're bombarded by information and don't get the "radical downtime" previous generations of children enjoyed.

They're also overusing important words like 'anxious', 'depressed' and 'traumatised' to describe everyday annoyances, he says.

Hawton's wife, who provides learning support at a New South Wales high school, says the first thing out of many teenager's mouths, however minor their challenge, is "I'm anxious".

This is problematic because the words we use to frame adverse or challenging experiences can really shape our experience, Hawton says.

"If you keep using inflammatory words and phrases to describe small events to yourself and other people, eventually that will have an effect - it will affect you in the long term because it becomes a pattern of behaviour."

Some parents find it tricky to put their own protective feelings aside when their child faces a problem, but it's important to do that.

Psychological overprotection - when parents quickly jump in to solve problems because it distresses them to see their child distressed - won't help that child become more resilient, he says.

If a child tells you that they're anxious, be supportive and compassionate and ask solution-based questions to help them think through their situation.

"We need to help kids start scaffolding alternative ways to think about the problem they might be facing. If parents can use those micro-moments... instead of helping the child avoid a problem... they can help the child to wrestle with the difficulties themselves…

Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

It Takes A VillageBy RNZ

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

2 ratings


More shows like It Takes A Village

View all
Nine To Noon by RNZ

Nine To Noon

25 Listeners

Afternoons by RNZ

Afternoons

11 Listeners

Saturday Morning by RNZ

Saturday Morning

36 Listeners

Sunday Morning by RNZ

Sunday Morning

10 Listeners

Morning Report by RNZ

Morning Report

20 Listeners

Nights by RNZ

Nights

2 Listeners

Inside Health by BBC Radio 4

Inside Health

95 Listeners

At The Movies by RNZ

At The Movies

2 Listeners

Checkpoint by RNZ

Checkpoint

7 Listeners

The Panel by RNZ

The Panel

4 Listeners

Nine To Noon Politics by RNZ

Nine To Noon Politics

1 Listeners

Australian Birth Stories by Sophie Walker

Australian Birth Stories

180 Listeners

Feel Better, Live More with Dr Rangan Chatterjee by Dr Rangan Chatterjee: GP & Author

Feel Better, Live More with Dr Rangan Chatterjee

3,875 Listeners

Your Money With Mary Holm by RNZ

Your Money With Mary Holm

9 Listeners

How To Fail With Elizabeth Day by Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment

How To Fail With Elizabeth Day

1,334 Listeners

The Detail by RNZ

The Detail

58 Listeners

The Imperfects by Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg

The Imperfects

418 Listeners

First Up Podcast by RNZ

First Up Podcast

1 Listeners

Beyond the Bump by Sophie Pearce & Jayde Couldwell

Beyond the Bump

91 Listeners

Shared Lunch by Sharesies

Shared Lunch

8 Listeners

Kiwi Yarns by Stuff | Brodie Kane Media

Kiwi Yarns

14 Listeners

Midday Report by RNZ

Midday Report

1 Listeners

The Curve by The Curve Platform

The Curve

12 Listeners

Keep The Change by nextAdvisory

Keep The Change

10 Listeners

Smart Talk by RNZ

Smart Talk

0 Listeners

Dish by Cold Glass Productions

Dish

599 Listeners

Sex.Life by ZM Podcast Network

Sex.Life

31 Listeners

Culture 101 by RNZ

Culture 101

0 Listeners

Music 101 Interviews by RNZ

Music 101 Interviews

0 Listeners

Making Cents by Frances Cook

Making Cents

9 Listeners