Have you ever met someone where the chemistry was incredible, but it led you to act like a complete lunatic? Maybe this person canceled dinner plans, triggering you to do things that made you cringe WHILE doing them. But you couldn’t stop it from happening. You barely recognize yourself because you’re usually pretty even-keeled. When triggered into this crazy mode, some people throw objects or scream in public or send a million text messages or stalk someone on social media or sleep with their ex. You feel shame for your actions, desperately wanting your equilibrium back, but this person you are attached to—the one who triggers your crazy—has you strung up. You feel powerless.

So what causes “normal,” rational people to spin totally out of control? Often it’s a combination of scarcity and fear of abandonment. You’re afraid love can only come from this person who you have wildly intense feelings for, reminding you of how hard you worked for love as a kid. And you’re afraid that if you don’t hold on for dear life, you’ll lose them. It doesn’t really matter what your brand of crazy is. What matters is why you do it; what your motivation is. And the best way to uncover it is to let your crazy run free. Beating it back just submerges it. When you give yourself permission to go bat shit crazy, you start to accept all of yourself, which brings you to wholeness. So go ahead, unleash the beast!