🔸 "You will not receive love, just give up" on romance.

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
Theresa's making this easy for me. I could push back on some of the analyzing, but it doesn't seem to be interfering much with the work. And my own analyzing parts like the company.

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire
"

🔸 Direct access of the Reacher.

After listening back to this (about 3 months and sessions later) Rosie followed up:

"...noticed this reaching part coming up as I was sitting in an audience starting to anticipate my cameo appearance, and was able to turn towards, right there in the audience, and relax it. The performance had other technical issues, but I was much more grounded in myself. ‘Twas good 😊"

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
I know how to help people talk to their parts, and I know how to talk to my parts, but how to talk to others' parts? I used to feel like direct access required a big shift, a different approach. And there are far fewer examples to learn from.

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 “I’m a mess”

🔹 Parts:

-----
🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form
😀Come chat with us: Discord
🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here:
Itunes
YouTube
How to leave a review - iPhone

🔸 IFS is hard! Full body fear and anxiety. Who is it?

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
I didn't say it during the call, I had already done enough theorizing, but I wonder if Justine finds the work so hard because of her facility with it: she catches the interferences, stays grounded, doesn't get thrown off when my questions miss the mark, respects the voice that says "you're supposed to do it this way" while holding true to what she observes, pre-empts and prompts me when she's looking for direction...

I can imagine that making the project more daunting. Someone who only catches a glimpse might be more eager to put another toe in the water, while one who so quickly accesses Hubble-vision is dizzied by the depth.

Another speculation I didn't voice: are any of these parts related to what she previously described as the "good girl" part? Is that part anxious, still afraid of wasting my time (having not done her homework?), or in opposition to this inner power? Is it "the good girl, getting it right" fearing the implications of Self-leadership, taking ownership of the practice? I'll have to check my notes, but wasn't she also 4 years old?
-----
🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form
😀Come chat with us: Discord
🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here:
Itunes
YouTube
How to leave a review - iPhone

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 "Cursed, untouchable, incredibly lonely, and desperate... she rejected her mother because of the way she was touching her."

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
Thanks to Ivan's edits, you don't hear the dogs in my home barking every 10 minutes. You (and Mio) also don't hear me, in those moments, repeatedly hitting mute to tell them to shut up. There's one other call recorded while I was dog-sitting. What I will do differently: not say yes to that again. I love my friend, and I love dogs, but I can not abide such obstreperousness!
-----
🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form
😀Come chat with us: Discord
🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here:
Itunes
YouTube
How to leave a review - iPhone

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 "Don't do dumb stuff!" Don't give people false hopes. All seems straightforward, and exile-less. I suggest we keep searching.

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

Theresa was patient with me as I prodded, and very helpful in letting me know when she was "searching" for an answer but not finding one. Makes my job much easier!

Theresa followed up:

-----
🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form
😀Come chat with us: Discord
🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here:
Itunes
YouTube
How to leave a review - iPhone

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 Picking up where we left off, hopelessness for itself and all the hurt children out there.

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
I have been reluctant to "give the part a name", concerned about putting people on the spot to be "creative", or unfairly crystalizing something amorphous, or crossing a line with skeptical parts. Just like I wouldn't ask someone who is "spiritual" / "believes in a higher power" to name their god.

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 "I can't just be alone" an exile unburdened. Implicit direct access.

🔹 Parts:

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
This is me at the edge of my comfort/confidence, max directiveness. I considered the context: our work together in the past, and on how rarely Aandraya and I talk.

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 Judgement and the parts stifling it. “Relaxing into love with somebody is too dangerous”, “no man can be trusted”*

*Justine says I may have edited-out more detail than necessary on this one, including these quotes that reveal the topic.

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:
Audio-only is most challenging when I provoke exiles. Face-to-face, I tend to get quiet, rely on facial expressions to do a lot of the communicating.

How can I convey that through the mic? *Not* by rushing in with “Oh I'm so sorry, poor thing”. And it doesn't feel right to manufacture non-verbals that I've never used before. I don't know.
-----
🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form
😀Come chat with us: Discord
🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here:
Itunes
YouTube
How to leave a review - iPhone

👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 The youngest part, a baby frozen in fear. Can Mio help without knowing the history?

🔹 Parts: