Zach and Laura kick things off with their signature banter, sharing personal stories from their week. Zach recounts his recent trip to Chicago, sharing about connecting with an old friend and nerding out about superheroes. Laura recounts her excitement about seeing Wicked with her son, reflecting on the joy of revisiting experiences that remind us to embrace wonder and connection.

As the conversation transitions, Zach and Laura tackle the nuanced topic of manipulation versus boundaries in relationships. What’s the difference between expressing your needs and attempting to control your partner’s behavior? They explore how manipulation often sneaks in when communication breaks down and how healthy, collaborative boundaries can strengthen relationships.

Laura opens up about a time early in her marriage when she used the silent treatment as a manipulative tactic to get her way. She admits, “I thought I was being clever, but really, I was just shutting my partner out.” Zach shares how guilt and unclear communication led to his own missteps in creating healthy boundaries. They explore common examples—emotional, time, financial, and physical boundaries—illustrating how small changes can lead to healthier dynamics.

The episode balances humor, personal anecdotes, and expert insights as Zach and Laura share practical strategies for recognizing manipulation, fostering intentional communication, and setting clear boundaries that honor both partners' needs.

1. Manipulation vs. Boundaries:

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Zach and Laura are joined by special guest Dr. Jeanne Michele https://drjeannemichele.com/, a relationship coach and author of The Infidelity Cure https://amzn.to/4g6QBSf. The trio delves into the complex topic of infidelity, exploring its emotional impact, the motivations behind it, and how couples can navigate the aftermath. Jeanne shares her professional insights, emphasizing the importance of understanding vulnerability factors that can lead to affairs and the paths to recovery for all parties involved: the betrayed partner, the involved partner, and the affair partner.

The conversation is rich with anecdotes, practical advice, and moments of levity, as Jeanne, Zach, and Laura reflect on the deeper needs driving infidelity and how couples can rebuild trust. From navigating the decision to disclose an affair to setting new boundaries and agreements, this episode offers a compassionate guide for those grappling with the complexities of betrayal and healing in relationships.

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Zach and Laura explore the theme of transitions in relationships and the importance of honoring life’s natural seasons. They share personal stories about changes in their own lives, from shifting priorities to redefining roles in work and family. Together, they discuss how relationships—whether professional, personal, or familial—are constantly evolving, and how embracing these transitions with grace can lead to deeper connections and personal growth.

The conversation highlights the significance of open communication, mutual respect, and self-awareness when navigating times of change. Zach and Laura offer insights into how couples and individuals can approach transitions thoughtfully, ensuring that shifts strengthen rather than strain their relationships. With humor, warmth, and vulnerability, this episode is a heartfelt reflection on growth, priorities, and the beauty of new beginnings.

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Zach and Laura take a deep dive into the highs, lows, and unexpected lessons that come with weddings and the relationships they celebrate. Drawing from their own wedding stories—like Laura’s epic lightning-filled ceremony and Zach’s traditional Connecticut celebration—they explore how these milestone events can shape and reflect the dynamics of a relationship.

The discussion covers the importance of crafting meaningful vows, navigating family dynamics during wedding planning, and embracing the imperfections that inevitably arise. Zach and Laura emphasize how weddings can highlight relational strengths and challenges, serving as both a “before and after” moment in a couple’s journey. They also touch on the value of premarital counseling as a way to address potential hurdles before walking down the aisle.

Packed with humor, heartfelt advice, and practical insights, this episode is perfect for anyone planning a wedding, reflecting on their marriage, or simply looking for a fresh perspective on love and commitment.

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Zach and Laura reflect on significant milestones and life lessons. Laura shares her journey of completing the New York Marathon, weaving in lessons about endurance, self-discovery, and how the physical demands of a marathon parallel the emotional effort required in relationships. Zach celebrates four years of sobriety, reflecting on how his journey has reshaped his relationships, health, and mindset.

The episode dives into themes of personal growth, resilience, and navigating difficult phases in life. Zach recites a favorite poem about marathons, illustrating how breaking down challenges into smaller, manageable parts can lead to long-term success. Laura reflects on her recent decision to quit alcohol, sharing the impact it has had on her physical and mental health, as well as her desire to model positive habits for her family. Together, they explore how embracing hard things—like running a marathon or choosing sobriety—can create space for joy, clarity, and meaningful connections.

The conversation also touches on the value of support systems, including friendships and therapy, and how intentional choices can lead to lasting positive change.

Sponsor:

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Zach and Laura welcome relationship expert and mental health advocate Allison Raskin. They dive into her latest book, I Do, I Think: Conversations About Modern Marriage, exploring how marriage and commitment have evolved in today’s society. Allison shares insights into the “modern marriage,” discussing how relationships have shifted from traditional roles to more flexible, individual-focused commitments.

Allison opens up about her personal journey, including her past engagement and recent marriage, which shaped her views on love and relationships. She reflects on the importance of balancing individual needs within a partnership, the dynamics of choosing marriage when it’s no longer societally mandatory, and how to handle changes in relationship expectations. Together, they discuss concepts like emotional regulation, and how the flexibility of “modern marriage” allows for more intentional choices about commitment.

The conversation also covers different relationship models, such as non-monogamy, financial independence within marriage, and the significance of setting boundaries that meet each partner’s needs. Allison highlights the role of mental health in relationships and shares her journey from comedy to mental health advocacy. They wrap up with a fun chat about her YouTube channel and podcast, Just Between Us, which she co-hosts, and her Substack newsletter, Emotional Support Lady.

To explore more about Allison Raskin’s work, visit https://www.allisonraskin.com/, check out her latest book I Do, I Think here, and tune into her podcast Just Between Us https://www.youtube.com/c/JustBetweenUs.

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Zach’s shares his pedicure obsession. Laura has a rousing night with a bunch of Cathys at the senior center. 

After Laura attended Zach's Relationship Boot Camp she has questions about the concept of a Core Negative Image (CNI) and how it affects relationships. Zach and Laura unpack how each partner’s perceptions, often rooted in past experiences or insecurities, can lead to exaggerated negative views of one another, especially during periods of stress.

They also discuss rituals for client sessions, with Laura emphasizing the importance of taking responsibility for actions and acknowledging positive efforts, helping clients shift from criticism to affirmation.

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Zach shares of his first-time experience with Dungeons and Dragons. Laura is looking forward to a murder mystery party. 

They then explore the dynamics of acknowledging and meeting your partner's expressed needs, using a story from Laura’s therapy practice as a springboard to discuss the significance of understanding each other's boundaries and preferences.

Zach and Laura examine the role of emotional responses in relationships, particularly around anger and justified reactions. They emphasize the importance of differentiating between feeling attacked and being attacked, highlighting how trauma and personal history can sometimes cause a partner to perceive threats where none exist. They also discuss the concept of “getting big” to protect oneself and how trauma work—especially body-focused approaches—can aid in emotional regulation.

The episode concludes with reflections on long-term commitment, the value of patience in relational healing, and the realities of navigating relationships with a trauma-affected partner. They end on a light note, inviting listeners to explore their Patreon for bonus content, including personal stories and Zach’s book club.

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Laura has her first snow of the year, and on her morning run no less. Zach thanks you for listening and shares his admiration for another podcaster. 

They transition into a great conversation about how partners can communicate and take responsibility in meeting each other’s needs.

Laura shares a personal story about her relationship with her husband, Ryan, highlighting the tension that arises when Ryan commits to activities, like golf trips, without considering the impact on family time. This sparks a larger conversation about how partners can navigate commitments and balance personal interests with family responsibilities. They explore the concept of taking responsibility in a relationship, with Zach emphasizing the importance of reporting back to your partner about how you’re honoring their requests and commitments.

Zach and Laura also discuss the role of empathy and how partners can preemptively check in on each other's feelings and needs. They reflect on how simple acts, like acknowledging a partner’s feelings or proactively addressing concerns, can prevent conflicts from escalating. The episode offers practical insights into how couples can take small but meaningful steps to improve communication and build trust.

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Zach and Laura kick off this episode with some fun banter about Laura's outfit and a Zoom-themed party Zach attended with their mutual friend. They quickly shift gears to discuss the feedback they’ve been receiving from long-time listeners. With heartfelt messages from those who’ve listened to every episode, they reflect on the value their show has brought to people’s lives. Zach asks: How has listening to every episode of Marriage Therapy Radio impacted your life or relationships?

Laura shares a realization of how powerful affirmation can be, whether it’s with a spouse, children, or even teachers greeting students. This leads to her marriage tip of the day: Affirm someone today.

Zach and Laura dive into a TV show they've been watching, Nobody Wants This, which sparks a rich discussion about the dynamics of vulnerability, communication, and relationships depicted in the show. They explore themes of openness, accepting influence, and navigating the tension between personal identity and compromise within relationships. Zach relates moments from the show to real-life relationship dynamics, offering insights on how viewers can learn from the fictional couple’s journey.

Episode Highlights:

Join the Conversation:

Zach and Laura invite you to reach out if the podcast has impacted your relationships or if you’ve found certain episodes particularly meaningful. They also encourage you to check out Nobody Wants This and watch it through the lens of relationship growth.

Sponsor:

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