Securely Attached

Q&A: How should I respond when my child touches herself?


Listen Later

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

  • Why it is completely normal for young children to explore their bodies and engage in self-soothing behaviors.
  • How parents can respond to self-touching in a calm, shame-free, developmentally appropriate way.
  • The difference between setting healthy boundaries and unintentionally communicating shame around bodies or pleasure.
  • Why some children may use self-touching as a form of sensory input, comfort, or emotional regulation, especially at bedtime.
  • How to teach children about privacy and body boundaries using neutral, age-appropriate language.
  • What to do when self-touching is happening in a shared bedroom or around siblings.
  • Ways to help children expand their self-soothing toolbox with other calming sensory and bedtime supports.
  • Why parents' own discomfort or cultural messaging around sexuality can sometimes shape how these moments feel.
  • How to navigate sibling questions or reactions without making the behavior feel scary or secretive.
  • The importance of helping children feel safe, accepted, and connected to their bodies while still maintaining appropriate boundaries.

This episode will help you feel more confident responding to common childhood self-soothing and body exploration behaviors with calm, clarity, and compassion.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your son always has his hands down his pants

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with how developmentally appropriate expectations, boundaries, body autonomy, and consent with sex therapist Dr. Holly Richmond

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your 3-year-old to do things they don't want to do

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Securely AttachedBy Dr. Sarah Bren

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

109 ratings


More shows like Securely Attached

View all
Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled by JLML Press

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

3,637 Listeners

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson by Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

2,529 Listeners

Minimalist Moms Podcast | Purposeful Life & Parenting Tips by Diane Boden

Minimalist Moms Podcast | Purposeful Life & Parenting Tips

982 Listeners

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel by Esther Perel Global Media

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

14,880 Listeners

3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms by Cloud10

3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms

2,314 Listeners

The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast by 1000 Hours Outside

The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast

2,236 Listeners

Raising Good Humans by Aliza Pressman

Raising Good Humans

1,888 Listeners

Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry by Lynn Lyons LICSW, Robin Hutson

Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry

474 Listeners

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens by Dr. Lisa Damour/Reena Ninan

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

80 Listeners

Good Inside with Dr. Becky by Good Inside

Good Inside with Dr. Becky

4,480 Listeners

We Can Do Hard Things by Treat Media and Glennon Doyle

We Can Do Hard Things

41,321 Listeners

The Mel Robbins Podcast by Mel Robbins

The Mel Robbins Podcast

19,524 Listeners

After Bedtime with Big Little Feelings by Dear Media and Big Little Feelings

After Bedtime with Big Little Feelings

5,527 Listeners

Robot Unicorn by Nurtured First

Robot Unicorn

336 Listeners

Parenting & You With Dr. Shefali by Dr. Shefali / Maia Wisdom

Parenting & You With Dr. Shefali

151 Listeners