You know first hand the times when your daughter is down and out. Maybe she's feeling frustrated with her performance, she's being super negative, or maybe she's getting caught up in that downward spiral.

We're going to talk about that today. How do you help support your athlete when she is beating herself up? 

Nod your head if you've ever heard any of these from your daughter:

• Only wants to talk about the things she did wrong in a game
• Every time you give her a compliment she turns it negative or says "you have to say that, you're my mom!"
• Nothing is ever good enough

I frequently ask moms in our community what they struggle with most in supporting their athlete daughter and "Negative Mindset" is always a top response!

Here's what you need to know:

Average athletes:

• Believe they have to be hard on themselves in order to play well, otherwise they're letting their guard down
•  Don't want others to believe they think they're "too good." It's safer to focus on their flaws & mistakes... and be liked
• Don't know the difference between thought and fact; they believe everything they think

As her mom, you want:

• Believe in herself
• Notice the positives too
• Recognize all the great things she did
• Know that she is good enough, no matter what anyone else might say
• Have positive self-talk
• Be proud of herself

 So you...try to help by giving her advice and encouragement

• "Focus on the positives"
• "You did so many great things out there today, too!"
• "You're just as good as everyone else"
• "You're not chubby, you're beautiful"
• "You do belong on this team"
• "They do like you"

Unfortunately, telling isn't teaching. Just telling her things isn't actually teaching her how to overcome her own limiting beliefs and shift her negative self-talk into something more productive.

Plus, your daughter doesn't need you telling her everything. Your daughter needs her mom... and then to learn the skill of shifting her own thoughts.

You can't do this for her. This is one space where she has to learn the skills to do it herself.

But there are a few things you must do to help...

#1 - Stay in your role:

• Shape the environment
• Provide opportunities

#2 - Understand where she's coming from:

• Validate her experience
• Know that this is part of her psychology as a person & athlete
• Remember that the brain's #1 job is to keep us safe
• Research shows that people tend to focus more on the negative as they try to make sense of their experiences (Negativity Bias)

#3 - Provide HER the tools she needs to help herself. The could look like:

•  Sharing our new Athlete Tip podcast episodes
• Enrolling her in The Elite Competitor Program
• Helping her strengthen her mental game

Your daughter's role is to start recognizing these negative thoughts, evaluate her performance, shift her thinking, not attach her self-worth to her performance.

But she needs the tools to do this. It isn't innate for our brains to process in this manner unless we're taught how to do so. If you're anything like me, you've experienced this and know exactly what I'm talking about.

It just starts with doing the work! You can get started by joining our free training for Sports Moms that is happening now! Learn exactly how to get started with mental training for your athlete daughter! We'll be going over our proven Unstoppable Athlete Method to teach you the first steps to strengthening her mental game so she believes in herself as much as you do!

Register at: trainhergame.com

Ever wonder how to handle those mean girls so your daughter can play with confidence without all the drama?

One mom from our Elite Competitor Program private Sports Moms community recently shared that her and her daughter have been finding so much success in dealing with tough situations, such as this. She says:

"I have been able to communicate with my daughter better. And also my daughter says my girl has so much more self-awareness and is realizing how to handle situations with confidence."

Today we're going to talk about how to have confidence in handling challenging situations. We know that there are going to be really tough situations in our athlete daughter's life in her sport. Being able to equip your daughter with the skills to communicate and advocate for herself is key to navigating through these challenges.  

We want our daughters to be able to navigate and interact with a multitude of people throughout their lives. She's not always going to be met with people who are supportive of her. So, we want her to have confidence in herself regardless of what other people think. 

The less their mindset is going to be pulled down by some of these outward influences, the better.

Help her hone her skills in:

• Knowing her boundaries
• Knowing her goals
• Knowing how to speak up
• Knowing what it takes to shift negative thinking herself

All of those things are going to strengthen her confidence so that she can be resilient in the face of some of these things that come up in her life and her sport. 

She needs to have these skills of confidence herself so that she can navigate these tricky situations on her own. 

You can opt to train her mental game and with that being said, you can check out trainhergame.com, to get FREE training!

Have your athlete daughter be confident, but don't forget to let them know that you have their back as well. So, if a situation escalates to the point where your daughter is already feeling unsafe, maybe it needs to come to the coach's attention. 

And then don't be afraid to step in and speak with the coach or speak with the parent directly.  

If you come in with a calm mind then it's going to have a positive outcome. 

But if the situation is still tolerable, there's no need to overreact. 

Help your daughter to...

#1. Ignore the haters. 

They're always going to be there. It's just what it is. We want her to know how to handle those conflicts and know how to handle these kinds of people.

#2. Know her boundaries. 

What's acceptable? What's not acceptable? And when it's not okay, teach them to step up and say something. 

#3. Show her how to treat other women and also advocate for her to know what to say in those situations. 

Supporting other women also includes how to handle conflict and what that looks like to hold boundaries. 

Finally, give her the skills to be confident in the face of people who are not supportive of her. Remember, she needs to develop these confidence skills herself and you have the power to help her with that.

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

Thank your leaving a rating and review!

Post-competition is one of the toughest times for an athlete, especially when your athlete has a bad game, or is being hard on themselves.

Moms are always saying that they don't know what to say or that what they do say seems to be the wrong thing or makes things worse. 

So if you are struggling in your post-competition period, get your notes ready cause this episode is for you! We're going to share with you what you can be doing in that post-competition time because it is really, really important. 

It's an important opportunity for you and your athlete daughter to develop confidence. The post-game is one of the crucial moments for your athlete daughter. And in these moments, your daughter is looking to you to be her parent and be her support. Be that safe space. 

Avoid talking about the game immediately, fixing things, and focusing on the outcome. Show her instead that you are committed to the process. And that you're committed to understanding her. 

Allow your daughter to lead. Empower her. She can learn to be confident in her sports, especially post-games if you are willing to provide her with the right tools to navigate through these challenges.

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

If you're a mom whose daughter has her sights on playing in college, then our latest podcast is set up for you. Our special guest, Head Coach Diane Flick-Williams is my former coach and the head volleyball coach at Western Washington University.

She's also a mom to a multi-sport athlete who is a junior in high school. And she's in her 21st year directing the Western volleyball program. Diane is the most successful coach in program history, both in terms of wins and winning percentage. She owns the all-time head coaching record and she has guided the team to 15 seasons of 20 or more victories, 14 NCAA postseason appearances, and 10 GNAC conference championships. She has received the GNAC coach of the year honors 10 times now.

She has been influencing me for years. And honestly, I would not be doing the work that I am doing now, serving female athletes, if it weren't for her. 

Here are some of Diane’s tangible tips and insights as a mom and as a coach to help your daughter get to the next level in her sport!

To prepare your daughter, you need to know the following:

#1. Does she have enough skills to play the sport she's passionate about?

#2. Does she have enough interpersonal skills to connect with the team or the people around her?

#3. What does she want to learn more about or improve in her sports journey?

A female athlete who's self-aware and self-reflective in a positive way can go a long way in her sport. Being self-aware and self-reflective will help the learning and developing process become easier. It's the kind of attitude and mindset that doesn't shy away from pressure, but rather ready enough to face it. 

Allowing them to learn these skills is more important than trying to fix every obstacle in their way. 

Even when you're a coach, a good supporter will always be a parent who lets their kids speak for themselves and advocate for their decisions. You can ask them how they feel, and what kind of support they need from you. 

As a mom, our role in this sports journey is to support, guide, and give opportunities for our daughters to experience growth.

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

How do you develop your female athlete's confidence?

We want our daughters to not doubt themselves, and go out there strong and ready to face anything. We all want to help our daughters believe in themselves as much as we believe in them, not just in sports but also in real life. 

Self-confidence is not something that just happens over time. Self-confidence needs to be cultivated and developed. Your daughter needs to train and put in the work to have self-confidence, but how can we help her do that? 

But before we go into that, whether your daughter has been playing for a long time, or she's just starting, I want you to go through this checklist as a sports mom:

• You need to see where you are in this sports journey
• You need to check if you're doing the things that I'm about to tell you
• You need to point out which areas you need to improve

Are you ready? Here are some essentials you need to know about self-confidence and how to help your daughter develop it.

What is Self-Confidence?

What does self-confidence truly look like?

One of the soccer moms in our Elite Competitor Program community, Priscilla, experienced how her daughter developed self-confidence through mental training. 

She said, "My daughter and I have completed two weeks of training so far, she's played in two games this weekend, and yesterday was a state cup game. I can honestly say I saw zero issues with her mindset. It was such an improvement. It's such an improvement that I could notice that she needs to work on some agility. We had a great post-game. Talk about this. And this morning we did a little workout to start addressing it. She was up and ready before me to put in the work. I think she's starting to believe that she can be confident in herself while also striving to improve."

It's truly a joy to see that self-confidence in your daughter as she plays. And with Priscilla, two main things worked together to make this happen. One, her daughter was working on implementing what she is learning in the program. She is working on her mindset. She's working on what she can control and focusing on the process out there. Two, Priscilla herself has been working on her post-game routine. What to say to her daughter after she competes. 

The very normal parts of being an athlete involve handling pressure, preparing for adversaries, overcoming mistakes, and learning the tangible skills to develop confidence in her sport. 

To help your daughter with this you need to:

#1. Know your role and stay in your role

#2. Provide her the opportunities to develop her confidence

#3. Shift, where you were giving her recognition and praise

I hope you feel empowered to take on some of these first steps. 

And if you want to go a little bit deeper, go check out our free training for sports moms at trainhergame.com. This will help you with a really specific foundation with a step-by-step on what you can do to help build her confidence as well. 

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

Today's episode is all about pre game nerves. Having pre-game nerves is normal, but what should you do to handle this?

Our highlight for today's episode is a comment from one of our athletes in the community. Her name is Lynden, and she said,

"My biggest transformation has been my ability to bounce back from mistakes. This has helped me. Be more confident in my game and feel belonging. It also has shown me how to be a good role model. Be encouraging to my teammates. This program has helped me more than anything with my mental game. And I want to thank you guys for helping me."

Although Lynden was one of the participants of The Elite Competitor Program, she was the one who put in the work to get where she is right now. 

We only provide our athletes with the tools they need, and it's up to them to put them into the work. One of the tools we teach is learning to handle pre-game nerves, and that's what we're going to share with you today. 

What does having “pre-game nerves” mean? 

Having “pre-game nerves” is something that all athletes deal with. So if you are an athlete that gets nervous before games, you're feeling some things in your body, your heart's racing, maybe your stomach aches, you feel some digestion issues, your mouth is dry, or you're sweating, then that's normal, you’re having “pre-game nerves”.

And as uncomfortable it might feel like, it actually means the opposite.

This is your body preparing you to compete. 

It actually helps if you learn how to handle it. But when it gets overwhelming for you, that's when it starts to interfere with you being able to show up. 

Pressure is a privilege

This is something that I say all the time to my athletes. Pressure is a privilege. 

Pressure is a sign that you're ready and everyone gets to experience that. So embrace it and go out there shifting your nervousness into excitement. Take it as a sign that your body is ready!

See pre-game nerves as something useful instead of something to be avoided. 

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

 Welcome to the Raising Unstoppable Girl Athletes podcast. I'm your host, Bre, an Elite Competitor™ Coach for female athletes and I am excited that you're here. 

Whether you're an experienced sports mom with lots of seasons under your belt, you're just getting started on this whole sports journey, or somewhere in between... 

This podcast is for you to know exactly how to help your athlete daughter believe in herself, build confidence in her sport (and in her life), and how to navigate the ups and downs of being an athlete. 

Each month you will hear a podcast episodes on topics that you want most. 

I regularly ask our community what they're struggling with and what they want to hear. And then based on your responses, I co-create episodes for you. You will hear from guest speakers every month on topics that request, such as nutrition, rest and recovery, how to navigate being a sports mom, all sorts of different topics that are interesting and where you can hear from another perspective. 

You will also hear from moms and athletes who are on similar journeys as you, seeing that you're not alone and many of the experiences are very common across moms and athletes. You'll get to see real time how implementing some of what we talk about on the podcast works for our athlete daughters. 

Another thing that you will see every month is an 'Athlete Tip'. These episodes are specifically for athletes. Of course, moms, you can listen in too! 

The episodes will contain tips to help your daughter with some aspect of her game. These are great episodes just to send to your daughter or just to put on in the background when you're driving to the next practice or tournament. These are great things to just have sink into your daughter's mind so she can hear mental training tips from someone other than you. ;-)

We sincerely hope that this is your go-to podcast for raising your girl athlete, and to help us do that, I actually have a favor to ask of you. In order to get this podcast into the ears of as many families as possible and to help bring on the best guests to serve you, please take a minute to rate and review the podcast. 

It really helps grow awareness of the podcast, gain listeners, and attract the best guests to come to you. Thank you in advance; we would appreciate that so much. 

All right, moms... it's time to dive into the episodes! I'm coach Bre and I hope that you enjoy the Raising Unstoppable Girl Athletes podcast.

Are you ready for something new in 2023? We have some exciting things and big giveaways planned for our moms and female athletes!

As a little bit of a spoiler alert, we'll be giving away a free seat in The Elite Competitor Program for free! I'll be sharing with you where you can find details about this offer below. And I'll also talk about what you can do in the short time between wrapping up the podcast as it is now and relaunching it in 2023.

Here's what's new!

So we're relaunching because we want this podcast to be the go-to resource for raising self-assured female athletes. We want to be very deliberate about the episodes we record for you. And we're making some changes to better reflect what you're looking for, including inviting guests to address your concerns.

We're taking our time to put together something truly unique and meaningful for both moms and female athletes.

To wrap things up…

Stay connected with us during the break and while we prepare for our relaunch to be among the first to learn about something new we have in store for you.

Make sure you're in the loop with our new Podcast Re-Launch AND how to win a free spot in The Elite Competitor Program (plus other giveaways this January!:

Follow me on Instagram: @elitecompetitorcoach

Make sure you're getting our emails! (Check promos, spam, or junk and pull them out and mark not junk!)

If you're not on our email list - head to www.trainhergame.com & sign up for our free training for sports moms and you'll be set!

Join The Elite Competitor Society - our free FB group to connect, learn tips, and stay in the loop!

Give us feedback on what you want to hear from the podcast. You can always respond to our emails, Instagram stories, and Facebook posts.

What are you most interested in hearing about?

Who would you like us to invite as guests?

What do you enjoy most about our podcasts?

We want to hear your thoughts! 

We have even more exciting plans for you in the coming year. So stay tuned and in touch with us. Have a wonderful holiday season!

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

It's near year-end! What lessons have you learned with your female athlete this year 2022? Are you ready to welcome what's in store for you this upcoming year?

As we look forward to new beginnings in the new year, some things must come to an end. Our Elite Competitor Podcast will likewise come to an end in 2022. And we want to thank you for taking the time to listen to our podcast.

We launched our podcast intending to assist moms and female athletes on their athletic journeys. That is why we have chosen to pause, improve, and relaunch a brand-new podcast next year! We'll be having new guests, new topics, and more, so make sure to check it out.

It's been an incredible adventure creating the Elite Competitor Podcast. And we've always hoped that this podcast would be your go-to resource whenever you needed it. So, before the year comes to an end, we'd like to share with you today the major things we've learned in 2022 so far!

I’m excited to share a little behind the scenes of my high school team winning the Washington State Volleyball Championship for the 2nd year in a row, the mental training that we went to achieve that success, and a sneak peek at what we've got in store for 2023.

We understand the importance of mental training in the success of our female athletes. Not only in their sport, but in their entire life. So, before you close out the year and begin planning your New Year's Resolutions, here's a breakdown of the top three major things we learned in 2022!

#1. Mental training is what distinguishes athletes. And this state championship confirmed it for me!

#2. Athletes perform better when their parents perform well. You must invest in yourself if you want your athlete to thrive in her sport. You must also have a coach and a strategy. And it is this that will most likely lead to her success.

#3. Adversity and hardships are unavoidable. They aren't optional for you, and they aren't optional for your daughter. You must provide her with the necessary skills and mental abilities to overcome these obstacles.

Mental training is critical in both your and your female athlete's journey. And if you've been taking this for granted in the past years, maybe it's now time to add mental health training to your to-do list this year 2023. Let's all welcome a brand new start!

We're excited about what's in store for the new year, and we're grateful for all of your help. We wish you a pleasant, enjoyable, and connected holiday season, and we hope to see you all in 2023.

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

We are so excited to host our second mom-daughter retreat in Costa Rica this coming summer! 

This mom-daughter retreat is special in so many ways. This retreat offers an opportunity for you and your daughter to be together in a distraction-free environment. At the same time, you'll also get to experience so many amazing things: 

• Getting out of your comfort zone
• Working on your mental game (yes, both of you!)
• Working on your mom-daughter connection and more!

To learn more about the retreat, and also join one of the info sessions that we’re hosting,go to kristinabreanne.com/info. 

We don't want you to miss it. That's why I’m here to answer some common questions that we’ve received about our mom-daughter retreat in Costa Rica in July 2023.

When is the retreat?

The upcoming retreat will be held from July 1-8, 2023. You will fly into San Jose, Costa Rica at any time on June 30th and then we’ll all meet and head to Bodhi Surf & Yoga in Uvita, Costa Rica, on the morning of July 1st. Your hotel room for June 30th is covered, too!

What will we be doing?

I'm not going to give you all the details of our retreat because that's a surprise. But basically, the overview is that we will be doing a combination of surfing, yoga, and mindset lessons every single day. 

Our partners take care of the surfing lessons, which happen five times during that retreat, and the yoga lessons, which also happen five times.

And then we also have five specific mental training lessons that are a combination of things for your athlete and then things for you as a mom, as well as things that you do with your daughter. 

We have so many fun activities in store for both moms and athletes. 

There will also be some surprise adventures but rest assured they are safe and retreat attendees get to vote and help shape the experience..

Do I need to be in Good Shape?

This is the question that I think everybody wants to know. And the answer is "No, you don't need to be." You don’t need to be in peak performance shape, you don't even need to be in good shape. 

You just have to be willing to do some basics in surfing and also in yoga. 

In terms of surfing, you can honestly choose your adventure. The instructors will give you so many options for where you are and your ability level. 

You don't need to be in phenomenal shape to do our surfing and yoga activities. 

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Helpful Links:

• Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
• Join our FREE training for Sports Moms - How To Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game So She Believes In Herself As Much As You Do

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!