Resiliently Rising: Healing After Betrayal Trauma

Episode Summary:

In this episode, Carrie and David unpack why so many communication breakdowns aren’t actually about saying the wrong thing… they’re about what’s happening in the nervous system.

They explain what happens in the brain and body during conflict, why survival responses like fight, flight, shutdown, and fawn take over, and how betrayal trauma adds another layer of sensitivity and fear to communication. You’ll learn why traditional communication tools often fail when safety is missing, how nervous system regulation creates access to empathy and clarity, and what regulated communication actually looks like before, during, and after hard conversations.

Connect with Carrie:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 

🌻 Betrayal Healing Conference: https://betrayalhealingconference.com/?affiliate=healwithcarrie

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

If you’ve ever wondered, “Why can’t I calm down? Why can’t I feel safe? Why does my body feel like it’s always bracing?” — this episode will finally give you the answers your nervous system has been trying to tell you. Carrie and David break down the three core things every nervous system needs to feel grounded… and how betrayal shatters each one. You’ll learn why your brain won’t stop spinning, why your sense of choice feels ripped away, why connection feels so complicated after betrayal, and what it really takes to restore safety in your body again.

Connect with Carrie:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, Carrie sits down with Dr. Debi Silber, founder of the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute. Together, they explore why betrayal is unlike any other trauma—and what it really takes to move from shock and survival into genuine healing, self-love, and transformation. Debi shares how her own betrayals led to the discovery of the five stages from betrayal to breakthrough, an evidence-based framework now used worldwide. 

If you’ve ever wondered, Will I always feel like this?… this conversation offers both language and hope for what’s possible on the other side.

Connect with Debi Silber: 

Website: https://thepbtinstitute.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/debisilber/

TEDx: “Do You Have Post Betrayal Syndrome?“: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyqOR69dHiU

Connect with Carrie:
📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

✨Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

In this episode, Carrie and David dive into what it really means for the body to feel safe after betrayal — and why that sense of safety can’t be forced, faked, or found through willpower alone. Through a powerful metaphor, they explore the unseen ways you subconsciously experience safety or danger.

They share honest stories from their own healing, moments of tension and tenderness, and insights that help you see why sometimes your body reacts even when your mind says, “everything’s fine.” This conversation will help you understand safety in a deeper, more embodied way — one that invites curiosity, compassion, and the kind of awareness that leads to lasting change.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, we break down denial and betrayal blindness, two common responses in betrayal trauma that can make it hard to recognize what’s happening even when the signs are there. We explore how the nervous system chooses protection and attachment over awareness, and why both the betrayed partner and the partner acting out can struggle to see the truth clearly. We talk about the role of gaslighting, self-betrayal, and attachment needs in creating confusion and self-doubt. You’ll learn how to begin reconnecting to your body’s signals, rebuilding self-trust, and taking the next steps toward clarity and healing.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Carrie talks with trauma and addiction psychotherapist Jan Winhall, author of Treating Trauma and Addiction with the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model. They explore how trauma lives in the body, why self-destructive behaviors are survival responses, and how safety—not shame—is the key to healing.

Together, they discuss betrayal as a root wound, rebuilding safety in relationships, and how reconnecting with the body helps restore self-trust and connection.

Connect with Jan Winhall:
📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

🌀 Website: https://www.fspminstitute.com/

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, we unpack what to do when one partner seems “all in” on healing after betrayal and the other looks hesitant. We explore some of the reasons for this mismatch, and you’ll learn three practical moves to navigate it. Note: this conversation is for couples where both partners genuinely want to rebuild; chronic dismissiveness or defensiveness needs a different approach.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode of Resiliently Rising, Carrie and David walk through the Gottman Institute’s three-phase Revival Method for healing a relationship after betrayal—Atone, Attune, and Attach. They share how each phase rebuilds trust, emotional connection, and intimacy, weaving in their own lived experience to make the roadmap feel practical and hopeful. Carrie also introduces her new course, Rebuilding Us, which brings these concepts to life with guided somatic practices, partner exercises, and tools for nervous-system-based healing.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Noticing someone’s attractiveness isn’t betrayal—it’s human biology. In this episode, we unpack the difference between a neutral glance and lingering/objectifying, why the betrayed partner’s nervous system can go on high alert, and how couples can co-regulate in the moment. We share simple tools that rebuild safety through consistent “trust bank” deposits. Hopeful, practical, and research-informed, this conversation shows how repeated safe experiences can rewire fear into trust over time.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Episode Summary:
In this episode of the Resiliently Rising Podcast, Carrie and David dive into a raw listener question: Can a marriage be repaired without forgiveness or trust returning? Together, they explore the difference between patching a relationship and truly rebuilding, the toll of living in a guarded nervous system state, and why “staying for the kids” may not provide the safety parents hope for. They share personal experiences, research insights, and reflective questions to help you weigh the real cost of staying versus leaving after betrayal. This conversation is both honest and compassionate, offering guidance for anyone sitting in the tension of not being ready to forgive, yet unsure of what comes next.

Connect with Me:

📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean

✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching

💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus

🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety

🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership

👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay