Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships

Promises! Proclamations! Pronouncements of just what you want to hear. Does it happen as promised? No! See tactics for what they are: ways to get you stay, or get you onside, or get around you. SO important to recognize the bait & switch as it's happening. This episode helps you do just that! 

Hijackals use "Bait & Switch" tactics to get you to stay, to get off their backs, to get you onside with them, and to keep you fooled. Oh, NO! That can't go on any longer. See the tactics clearly for what they are, not for what you hope they might possibly be. The Hijackal is counting on you believing them, and believing in them. NO! They are not trustworthy and this episode will help you see even more reasons not to trust them.

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• Tactics Hijackals use to keep you hooked...and believing them
• What "bait & switch" looks like in Hijackal relationships
• 5 "Bait & Switch" moves most narcissistic people use to manipulate you
• Why you need to see these tactics and refuse to believe them again

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#baitandswitch #foolingme #ingenuineoffer #manipulationtactic #emotionalmanipulation

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Whether they are your in-laws--parents or siblings, or your adult children's in-laws, you can feel frustrated, infuriated, diminished, dismissed, or downright denied by in-laws you need to be right and want to be in control. It can tear your relationships apart. Worse, it can tear YOU apart! In this episode, you'll learn to recognize subtle and in-your-face screaming signs that Hijackal in-laws won't be ignored. Learn some ways to handle the horrors of Hijackal in-laws.

Direct emotional abuse from a Hijackal in-law is often couples with indirect emotional abuse through the family. It's important to do what you can to stop the flying monkeys, triangulation, and constant drama!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• The 7 horrors of Hijackal in-laws
• What you MUST handle first when you recognize you have a Hijackal in-law
• Traits of difficult in-laws
• 10 approaches to handling Hijackal in-laws

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#hijackalhorrors #hijackalinlaws #difficultinlaws #mychildmarriredanarcissist #handlingdifficultinlaws

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You need to consider whether or not you're addicted to the drama of being with a Hijackal or any other relentlessly difficult person. You may not have ever thought about it that way, BUT it's SO important to check out whether or not you ARE ADDICTED to drama. This is something you can change!!!

Is your life an emotional rollercoaster? Good sign there is drama involved!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• Checklist of addiction to drama from the book, Soul Solitude by Dr. Rhoberta Shaler and G. Charles Andersen, MA
• How you can become addicted to drama without realizing it
• 8 Secrets you can use to figure out if an addiction to drama has you in its clutches
• The benefits of recognizing any signs that you are addicted to the rollercoaster that is life with a Hijackal

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#addictedtodrama #dramaofabuse #foolingmyself #youcanchangethis #giveupthedrama

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Good for you! Recognizing codependent self-talk is a super important part of overcoming unhealthy emotional reliance on others...particularly those Hijackal others!!! Reflect on these ten things you may be in the habit of telling yourself, and change your habits to healthier ones.

You are important. Your needs are important to know and to express. You are not selfish for keeping a balance between compassion for yourself and compassion for others!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• How codependence shows up in your relationship
• Definition of codependence
• Changing self-talk that makes codependence OK
• 10 things to change in your self-talk to be more balanced and assertive

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#codependence #overcomingcodependence #negativeselftalk #codependentselftalk #changeyourselftalk #getunstuck

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Leaving an emotional abuser is taxing, difficult, and brave. So many considerations! And, if you have children, so many more.

When you're with a Hijackal, you can be too trauma-bonded to see your way clearly to dinner time, let alone to see your way to leaving. In this episode, I offer many considerations that can seem daunting...at first. Breaking them down makes it more apparent what might be holding you back from leaving an emotionally abusive situation, whether that is with a partner, parent, sibling, in-law, or friend.

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• Why you feel exhausted, frustrated, anxious & unsafe
• How you talk yourself into staying
• Fears you have about leaving an emotional abuser
• Addressing your fears, and fear of failure

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#leavinganabuser #leavingemotionalabuse #decidingtoleave #leavingahijackal #fearoffailutre

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Understanding how "all or nothing" or "black and white" thinking divides your relationship and reduces the possibilities for growing towards each other is EYE-OPENING. It's always lurking in a Hijackal relationship, and being ready to do it differently can be GAME-CHANGING. In this episode, explore the how's and why's, as well as the what-to-do's when this "splitting" occurs.

Black & white thinking leaves you feeling confused, uncertain, and fearful.NO MORE!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• What splitting is
• Why Hijackals are caught in black or white, all or nothing thinking
• How to recognize and define all or nothing thinking
• Ways in which splitting or black and white thinking shows up
• What Hijackals do to emphasize their points when splitting

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#splitting #psychologicalsplitting #blackandwhitethinking #allornothingthinking #crazy-making

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You'll be hoping for a very long time, and is that OK with you? If you're giving yourself excuses to take action, hoping a Hijackal will change is often at the top of that list. Listen to the episode to see this all more clearly.. Don't abandon yourself by giving your life over to being hooked on hope! 

Hooked on hope actually means "addicted to the expectation for something you desire to happen." That might help you see the problem.

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• Why there is little hope a Hijackal will change
• Why the change required is to be the one who is changing
• Why you may think it's best to "not give up on the relationship"
• Love-bombing vs. real, healthy love

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#narcissistsdontchange #hookedonhope #waitingforchange #hijackalsdontchange #abusersseldomchange #stopwaitingforsomeonetochange

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You are likely anxious, feeling unsafe, angry, and exhausted from life with a relentless difficult Hijackal. Understanding enabling and knowing how to stop--beginning with small ways--is important for your well-being and mental health. You likely never meant to become an enabler. It happens slowly. And, just as slowly, you abandon yourself in favor of meeting the needs and taking responsibility for the actions of another person.

See the enabling clearly, and use these 10 Ways to find your way back from enabling other adults. Not your job!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• Dr. Shaler's definition of enabling
• How enabling differs from empathy
• Not being responsible for the actions of others
• Essential nature of boundaries
• 10 Ways to Stop Enabling over time

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#stopenabling #whatenablingis #enablingvsempathy #enablingisdisabling #abandoningmyself

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There's that person who seems incapable--and, also unwilling--to ever put themselves in your shoes, right? Or, that person who doesn't want to hear anything about you and always returns the conversation to themselves? Or, that person who could care less that you are hurting, celebrating, or anything in between? They may be empathy-deficient. I'm sharing some ways to know if that's a pattern, and who they really are.

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• 3 kinds of empathy
• what it means to have an empathy deficit
• how it feels to be in a relationship with an empathy-deficient person, parent, partner
• why they do things for others they won't do for you
• 10 ways to deal with a person who doesn't care to understand your feelings, circumstances, or needs

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#empathydeficient #empathydeficit #hasnoempathy #dealingwithapersonwithnoempathy #doesmypartnercare

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"OK, Babe, I promise you the world." But, what about delivery? Learn more about how Hijackals trick you into believing they are GOING TO do something, or WANT the same things you want. It's Future Faking!

It's SO important to see the patterns, and sometimes, when you've been worn down and torn down by living in a toxic relationship, you simply don't see them. Future Faking is important to recognize. It can make the difference between staying and going!

HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:

• What Future Faking is
• Why you may not clearly see the future faking
• How to see future faking for what it is
• Recognizing the patterns of future faking in your relationship may help you see why you stay for more abuse
• The manipulation: love-bombing, seduction, bait-and-switch of future faking

I'm here to help. Let's talk soon.

Rhoberta

Introductory session for new clients,only $97

FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...

WEBSITE: https://www.EmergingEmpowered.com

PODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com

NEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.com

FACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor

TWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

INSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

PINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp

-------------------------------------------------------------

I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,

join my Emerging Empowered Community now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!

WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community 

#futurefaking #emptypromises #failuretodeliver #promiseanything #suckedinbypromises

#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders

#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.