I'm gonna be honest about what it actually feels like to be placed on a pedestal you never asked to be on, why vulnerability felt like the enemy for most of my life, and what God had to take me through in 2025 to break all of that out of me (and he was not gentle about it).

This is part two so if you haven't watched part one please start there, but in this episode I'm getting into everything I actually learned coming out of that season because there was a lot.

We'll discuss:

• Why not everybody deserves access to your vulnerability even when you're actively working on it
• The difference between people making deposits versus withdrawals when you open up (and how to tell which one is happening)
• What I actually changed about my standards and my relationships to protect myself going forward

If you can relate to this, know that the high achiever conditioning doesn't just stop at your vulnerability, it affects your ability to actually pursue the things you want in life because you're so used to performing. Once you remove that conditioning from your identity, it opens up a world of possibilities you couldn't step into as that performative version of yourself. For coaching to remove the high achiever conditioning from your identity to step into your next level, enroll in the Spring cohort: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

[Substack] Diary of a High Achiever: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you're the one who always has it together, the one everybody expects to be okay, the one who would genuinely rather deal with it alone than give people the opportunity to disappoint you — this episode is going to feel uncomfortably familiar.

I'm gonna be honest about what it actually feels like to be placed on a pedestal you never asked to be on, why vulnerability felt like the enemy for most of my life, and what God had to take me through in 2025 to break all of that out of me (and he was not gentle about it).

We'll discuss:

• Why I disdain vulnerability & why high achievers specifically, struggle with vulnerability
• The four responses you almost always get when you open up as the strong one (and why they make you want to never do it again)
• What being placed on a pedestal actually costs you and how it quietly conditions you to keep everything to yourself
• What it took for me to finally understand why I was so allergic to vulnerability and what it was really protecting me from

If you can relate to this, know that the high achiever conditioning doesn't just stop at your vulnerability, it affects your ability to actually pursue the things you want in life because you're so used to performing. Once you remove that conditioning from your identity, it opens up a world of possibilities you couldn't step into as that performative version of yourself. For coaching to remove the high achiever conditioning from your identity to step into your next level, enroll in the Spring cohort: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

[Substack] Diary of a High Achiever: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You've been working hard, staying consistent, making sacrifices... and yet just when things finally start working, something in you pulls back. You go quiet, you lose momentum, you forfeit the exact moment you've been working hard for. It makes no sense, and it's been driving you crazy.

This episode is going to explain what is actually happening every time that cycle plays out, (because I promise you it goes way deeper than discipline or how bad you want it), and once you understand it you will never look at it the same way again.

We’ll discuss:

• The REAL reason why you lose momentum the moment things start working in your favor
• Why your hard work and discipline STILL isn't enough unless you get this ONE thing right
• The thing I discovered about myself that finally explained why I kept sabotaging my own breakthroughs
• Practical exercise to do next time this happens so you don't sabotage your opportunity

If this has been happening to you and you’re tired of it, join Become You 2.0 to get the blueprint that will get your nervous system on board with your next level so you stop sabotaging every time things start working out: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

Journal prompts for high-achievers: https://secludedthoughts.com/doha

Journals prompts to become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/journals

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You know that season where you're not who you used to be, but you haven't fully stepped into who you're becoming yet? That in-between phase where you're doing everything right, working hard, and staying consistent, but something keeps blocking you from your next level? Yeah, that's exactly what this episode is about.

And I'm going to tell you something you probably haven't heard before about why you're stuck there and what's actually going to get you out. Because I promise you, it's not what you think.

We'll discuss:

• What the in-between phase actually is and why so many people get trapped here longer than they need to
• The sneaky reason your results keep fluctuating no matter how much effort you put in
• Something that happened to me that revealed exactly what was really standing in my way (and it caught me completely off guard)
• Why everything you've been trying hasn't been working, and the one thing that changes all of it
• A practical exercise you can do today to find what's actually blocking you

If this episode resonated with you & you noticed some resistance when doing the exercise at the end, here's the blueprint to remove those blocks and become the version of you required for your next level: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

Journal prompts for high-achievers: https://secludedthoughts.com/doha

Journals prompts to become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/journals

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, I'm getting in your business (you've been warned). I'm breaking down six shifts I had to make that completely changed my life. We'll discuss:

• The mentality that keeps you in a loop of negativity
• The 3 ways you're seeking validation that's holding you back
• The thing high achievers specifically struggle with that quietly destroys confidence (this one might hit different)
• Why waiting for clarity is actually the problem
• The loop keeping you stuck at step one with no progress
• The fear hiding underneath all of it, literally holding you hostage

If this episode resonated with you — especially the parts about victim mentality, fear of being seen, or waiting for clarity before you take action — what you're experiencing are symptoms of a misaligned identity. Meaning: the version of you that's trying to do the thing isn't fully aligned with the life you're trying to build. If you're ready to actually become the version of you required for your next level, I'll give you the blueprint: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

Journal prompts for high-achievers: https://secludedthoughts.com/doha

Journals prompts to become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/journals

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

My first Youtube video was me talking about how I was afraid to put myself out there. And now 2 years later I'm telling you everything I learned that helped me get more comfortable showing up online.

Note: this episode is an oldie but goodie so the community no longer exists, however, I have created a new community with coaching to help you become the best version of yourself.

If you struggle with the fear of being seen, confidence, procrastination, self-sabotage, any anything else that hinders you from becoming the best version of yourself, sign up for coaching with me: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

Journals prompts to become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/journals

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you’re a high achiever, you may be dealing with what I call pedestal relationships — where people place you on a pedestal, expect you to always have it together, and then don’t show up for you the same way they show up for others. In this episode I share how I realized this was happening in my life, the signs I ignored at first, and the changes I’m making so my relationships aren’t built on me being the “strong one” all the time.

[Substack Post ] The Weight of Being Placed on a Pedestal: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/p/the-weight-of-being-placed-on-a-pedestal

Journal for High Achievers: https://secludedthoughts.com/doha

Need help becoming the best version of yourself?: https://secludedthoughts.com/masterclass

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Hyper independence doesn’t come from nowhere. For a lot of high achievers, it’s learned. It’s survival. It’s what you do when you realize no one is coming to save you.

In this episode, I’m opening up about how 2025 forced me to confront my hyper-independence and self reliance—and why God allowed it to break me down instead of letting me power through it like I’ve done in the past.

We talk about:

• how “strength” and independence can become a stronghold
• why I grew to avoid depending on people and being vulnerable
• what happens when you’re the “strong friend” who finally runs out
• what happened when I finally started opening up
• why God had to break the stronghold of hyper independence in my life
• and why community isn’t optional for the next chapter of your life

This is the first episode in the series for the month of February where we talk about Shedding—letting go of what can’t come with you into the next chapter.

[Substack] Diary of a High Achiever: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/

• Read the post on Pedestal Relationships here

Journal Prompts for Relationships: http://secludedthoughts.com/journals

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode we'll discuss both why you self sabotage and how to stop self sabotaging. If you don't do these things you run the risk of sabotaging your 2026 goals.

If you struggle with self-sabotage and inconsistency when you try to work on your goals, sign up for my free masterclass to learn exactly what's causing it and how to fix it so you can become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/masterclass

Ready to stop being inconsistent and shift your identity to finally become the best version of yourself? Enroll in Upgrade Your Standard: https://secludedthoughts.com/upgrade

Subscribe to my Substack for the BTS of becoming the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.substack.com/

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This is your year end pep talk to get your life together before 2026. These are 5 things I need you to keep in mind as you start planning for 2026.

If you struggle with self-sabotage and inconsistency when you try to work on your goals, sign up for my free masterclass to learn exactly what's causing it and how to fix it so you can become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/masterclass

Ready to stop being inconsistent and shift your identity to finally become the best version of yourself? Enroll in Upgrade Your Standard: https://secludedthoughts.com/upgrade

Authenticity episode: #221. How to be Authentic AND believe that YOU are enough

Subscribe to my Substack for the BTS of becoming the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.substack.com/

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy