Divorce is always an opportunistic event except that most people don't see it that way.

It's opportunistic because at least for the person making the decision to end the marriage, they have concluded that life will be better outside the relationship. It doesn't mean that the divorce was what they wanted or that it isn't hurtful, painful and difficult.

Nor does it mean that every aspect of their life will be better. Finances might be worse but emotionally it would be better. Lifestyle may change but parenting may become easier.

Weighing all the considerations, the decision-maker sees that their life on balance would be better.

And usually that's not just by a little. People often say that it's the 'I can't stand it any longer' type of better or the 'there is no hope of change' type of better, even the 'I'm going to make myself sick if I don't do this.'

So what does it take to see divorce as an opportunity? What does it take if you aren't the one making the decision? Is there a way to make sure you aren't making a mistake?

Joining Mandy for this Conversation is attorney and mediator Gabrielle Hartley. Gabrielle has been developing a non-toxic approach to divorce for over twenty years and keeps 99 percent of her cases out of the courtroom. She's the author of Better Apart: The Radically Positive Way to Separate.

You can download Gabrielle's The Five Essential Elements to Becoming Better Apart at her website https://gabriellehartley.com.

You'll find a synopsis of this show at Mandy's blog at https://sincemydivorce.com/divorce-opportunity-end-world