Join Alli on Substack – https://wisewoman/ method.substack.com

You’re at your kid’s school event, paper plate in hand, fluorescent lights buzzing loudly overhead. Someone asks what you do. You managed a whole department that morning. You built something real. And somehow the words that come out of your mouth are, “Oh, I just have this little side project I’m figuring out.”

That’s the self‑edit. You’ve done it before. You know it well. You just can’t seem to stop.

In this episode, I’m naming a pattern most women never get language for. It’s the reflex we have to shrink our work, soften our accomplishments, and add qualifiers until the thing we built sounds like something we barely touch on weekends. It isn’t a confidence problem. It’s wiring. And it can be changed only if you start noticing it and stop doing it.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(01:40) — What the self-edit is and why smart women do it constantly 

(03:00) — Why your brain learned to flag visibility as a social threat

 (04:54) — What biblical humility actually is (Deborah led a nation) 

(05:27) — The woman three steps behind you is watching how you carry your calling

(06:32) — Why your nervous system starts believing the edited version if you're not careful 

(08:32) — What actually changed for Rachel (hint: not her resume or her revenue)

(09:03) — How identity works: you become what you practice 

(10:03) — The one practical thing to do the next time someone asks what you do

(12:29) — Closing: You can stop self-editing now. This is your moment. 

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉 Don't forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you’re always in the loop. And hey, while you're at it, why not pop over to our YouTube channel and check us out? If you're feeling the love, leave a review and sprinkle some stars because your support truly means the world to me! Take care, and keep shining bright! 

xo,

Alli

Join Alli on Substack – https://wisewoman/ method.substack.com

If you’ve been building something online long enough to remember when a book deal and a blog following felt like the same thing, listen in for a long exhale. Writer, podcaster, and longtime reader‑advocate Laura Tremaine joins Alli for a conversation that blends honest business reflection with a genuine pep talk about what still matters.

Laura has been at this for years. She co-hosted the wildly popular Sorta Awesome podcast, launched Smartest Person in the Room and 10 Things to Tell You, and wrote two books shaped directly by her podcast community. She’s someone who has lived through all waves of online content, from early blogging to the podcast boom to the celebrity-podcast takeover, and she has real insight on it all.

This is a Smart Girl Summer conversation. Listen as two women who have been in the arena for more than fifteen years talk about what they’ve learned, what surprised them, and what they’re betting on next.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(03:36) - How Laura describes what she does in 2026: reader, writer, podcaster (04:51) - Is there a new book coming? Laura shares where she is in the process (06:45) - Substack as the new blogging, and why long-form writing is back 

(08:29) - Alli's Substack origin story: strategic skeptic to convert 

(09:40) - Do Substack audiences actually buy books? The data question nobody can answer yet 

(10:44) - Laura's full podcasting journey: Sorta Awesome to 10 Things to Tell You (13:47) - The book deal she couldn't get as a blogger, and how podcasting finally opened the door 

(16:01) - How the podcast ad economy changed after the pandemic 

(17:20) - Celebrity podcasts, audiobooks, and the great listenership shift

 (18:35) - Why Laura closed 10 Things to Tell You (and what she's doing instead) (19:35) - On not launching the next thing before you're ready 

(20:59) - Slow Read: Laura's new co-hosted podcast with Sarah Stewart Holland of Pantsuit Politics 

(23:00) - Secret Stuff: the placeholder name that stuck, and why it works 

(25:07) - Social media in 2026: how Laura really feels about it 

(30:59) - Stories vs. the grid, and who each one is actually for 

(33:13) - Feeling "old" in the content world, and what to do about it

 (39:08) - Experiences over content, and why in-person community is more important than ever 

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉Don’t forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you never miss a thing. And guess what? We're on YouTube! If you're loving the content, show us some love by leaving a review and giving us some stars. It means the world to me! Take care, and stay fabulous! 

xo,

Alli

Join Alli on Substack – https://wisewoman/ method.substack.com

You made the decision this morning. Coffee still hot, intention alive. By 9:15, you had talked yourself right out of it.

If that feels a little too familiar, stay with me for this episode.

I’m introducing something I call the self‑negotiation loop. It’s the pattern where you already know exactly what to do, carry the decision for weeks or even months, and let every delay feel perfectly reasonable in the moment. The issue isn’t motivation. It isn’t discipline. It’s the way your brain is wired, and it’s costing you more than you think.

This is a solo episode, so stay with me for the insight that helps you finally do the thing.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(01:02) — Naming the self-negotiation loop and why every "maybe" feels so reasonable 

(01:44) — What the loop looks like on an average day (the blinking cursor that feels like a judgment)

 (02:21) — Why your brain will almost always choose familiar discomfort over unfamiliar growth 

(03:05) — Relief vs. peace: the difference that changes everything 

(03:36) — What Alli noticed in coaching: "That was so much easier than I thought it would be"

(04:26) — How hesitation quietly erodes self-trust, one renegotiation at a time

(06:00) — Evidence over confidence: the concept that actually builds a track record

(06:46) — Sarah's story: 5 months of preparation, 10 minutes of doing 

(08:00) — The faith connection: Esther didn't get a guarantee either 

(08:36) — The one practical step to take today 

(10:08) — You are always practicing becoming someone, especially in the small moments 

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉If you haven’t already, make sure you tap that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you never miss an episode. And yes—we’re on YouTube now too! If the show has been a bright spot for you, leaving a review or a few stars is such a gift. It truly means the world to me.

Take good care of yourself, and keep showing up with joy. Share this episode with a friend who might enjoy it too!

xo,

Alli

Join Alli on Substack – https://wisewoman/ method.substack.com

What does it look like to walk into a room as your full self, not the version who already decided she doesn’t belong there? Leadership coach and author Selena Rezvani has spent her career sitting with that exact question, and in this conversation, she brings the kind of stories and truth that land deep.

Selena teaches leaders how to build trust and share power, and she does so with credibility that comes only from real life. She has bombed the interview. She has eaten the whole sleeve of Milano cookies. She has gone back anyway and written a completely different ending. That’s why her work sticks. It’s lived, not theoretical.

This episode is for every woman who has ever over-prepared, under-showed, and wondered what might have happened if she had let herself take up the space she deserved. Listen in, and let it remind you that you belong in the room, too.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(01:48) - Selena's crooked career path from social work to executive coaching

(04:39) - How Selena structures her workday around energy, not equal time blocks

(07:28) - Raising twins, recovering from infertility, and what changes when you know what you fought for

(10:00) - Things Selena used to obsess about at work that she's finally let go of

(10:26) - How women can advocate for themselves without paying the "bluntness penalty"

(11:20) - The GPS framework: tailoring your pitch to someone's goals, passions, and struggles

(13:04) - Speaking peer to peer, not up to a pedestal, and the concept of healthy entitlement

(14:36) - What surprised Selena most in her research for her latest book

(15:15) - The study that found your manager's impact rivals your spouse's

(16:13) - The missed opportunity story, the rosé, the Milano cookies, and what happened when Selena went back

(19:35) - The most common misconception women have about vulnerability in leadership

(22:38) - Selena's travel talisman, her skincare secret (it's tretinoin, naturally), and her Poshmark obsession

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉Don’t forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you never miss a thing. And guess what? We're on YouTube! If you're loving the content, show us some love by leaving a review and giving us some stars. It means the world to me! Take care, and stay fabulous! 

xo,

Alli

Read Alli's Substack - The Wise Woman Method

You said yes to something good. Something you actually wanted. And now it’s 9 p.m., you’re standing in your kitchen eating shredded cheese out of the bag, and you’re wondering why the dream you prayed for feels like a low hum behind your eyes and a sudden irritation with every sound in your house.

This is not a sign you’re broken. It’s just your body waving a little white flag called an allostatic load. Once you know what’s actually going on, it’s a lot less mysterious and a little less personal.

Here’s me being honest: right now, I’m writing a book, wrangling a Substack, juggling a few businesses, and trying not to drop anything important on my own head. Turns out, when you’re carrying work that actually matters to you, it doesn’t feel like a motivational poster. It feels like slogging through mud, second-guessing every decision, and wondering if your brain has been replaced by a fog machine. I’ll talk about the science behind it, what my amygdala (I call her Becky) is plotting, and three things that might help when you’re stuck in the messy middle.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(00:00) - Introduction: When the dream costs more than you expected

(00:44) - Where Alli is right now: writing a book, launching a Substack, and the season she's in

(02:53) - What allostatic load is and why it matters

(04:18) - Becky, the amygdala, and why she gets chatty when the load gets heavier

(05:43) - The adaptation tax: what it means that growth happens in the carrying

(08:03) - Practical Step 1: Name the actual cost out loud

(08:48) - Practical Step 2: Stop adding, even small things

(09:20) - Practical Step 3: Decide which version of you is making decisions

(10:02) - A word directly to the woman who stayed

(14:12) - The science of mushrooms, immunity, and Dr. William Lee's research

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉 Don't forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you’re always in the loop. And hey, while you're at it, why not pop over to our YouTube channel and check us out? If you're feeling the love, leave a review and sprinkle some stars because your support truly means the world to me! Take care, and keep shining bright! 

xo,

Alli

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY! 

If you’ve ever talked yourself out of something you really wanted, told yourself it wasn’t the right time, or felt guilty for even wanting it, this episode is going to feel like a long exhale.

Therapist Niro Feliciano is back for Part 2, and we go deep into what it actually costs women when they stop investing in themselves, why women over 40 are sitting on the best years of their lives, and the simple mental shift that makes it possible to finally say yes to yourself without the guilt spiral.

We also talk about social media, self‑promotion, and the real reason most women won’t put themselves out there. Hint: it’s not what you think. Niro brings clinical insight. I bring the Disney World story and a strong opinion about cringe.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(00:52) - What it costs a family when mom is the only one not being invested in 

(01:11) - The modeling problem: what your kids are learning by watching you 

(02:00) - Maintaining your identity beyond being a mother and partner

 (02:41) - Why trying new things matters more than we think 

(04:04) - The brain science behind learning new things (and Niro's hatchet throwing story) 

(06:18) - Why Alli takes clients to Disney World twice a year 

(08:15) - The Mother's Day vs. Father's Day double standard nobody talks about 

(08:57) - What to say to the woman who has no real reason not to invest in herself 

(09:43) - The permission exercise: what would you say to a woman you love? 

(18:36) - C.S. Lewis on humility, and why it changes everything about social media 

(17:57) - The common roadblock for Christian women who want to build a business 

(20:16) - The real fear behind not wanting to post (it's not self-promotion) 

(20:47) - How to do a cost-benefit analysis on putting yourself out there 

(22:33) - Climbing Cringe Mountain: the cost of admission for doing anything that matters 23:56 - What it costs a family when mom is the only one not being invested in

(23:26) - Rapid-fire wrap-up: Niro's current favorites 

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉 Don't forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you’re always in the loop. And hey, while you're at it, why not pop over to our YouTube channel and check us out? If you're feeling the love, leave a review and sprinkle some stars because your support truly means the world to me! Take care, and keep shining bright! 

xo,

Alli

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY! 

Have you ever caught yourself holding back an idea, not because you found a better way to say it, but just to make it easier for someone else to hear? This quiet habit of downplaying what you really think or want can sneak up on you. Over time, it can make you start living smaller without even realizing it.

In this episode, I share a story from a recent Catalyst retreat at Seacrest on 30A. While we sat in a circle, one woman leaned in and said something that made everyone pause. She said, "I feel like I have to pretend I don’t want as much as I actually do." Her words show why this conversation is important for you as well.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

Timestamps:

(00:50) - The Catalyst retreat at Seacrest on 30A: what happens when women sleep on the conversations they didn't have

(02:48) - The moment the room shifted: when women stop introducing themselves and start telling the truth

(03:45) - Your amygdala (Becky), why she's been running your self-editing, and what she's actually protecting you from

(04:48) - The habit that doesn't feel like a habit anymore: why self-shrinking feels like your personality

(05:06) - The heavy purse analogy: what it feels like when you finally set it down

(06:02) - Why you're not tired from doing too much; you're tired from managing what people think while you do it

(06:58) - What some of us learned about being a "good Christian woman" and what God actually has to say about it

(07:39) - The honest confession: trusting God on paper vs. trusting him in your nervous system

(08:22) - The difference between faith and bracing, and why you don't have to make your wanting smaller

(09:24) - Step 1: Notice the moment you adjust yourself

(09:43) - Step 2: Say one thing without reshaping it

(10:27) - Step 3: Pay attention to who lets you stay fully yourself

(11:08) - What Catalyst Mastermind is and why Alli started it

(12:05) - What it looks like to come home to yourself

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉Don’t forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you never miss a thing. And guess what? We're on YouTube! If you're loving the content, show us some love by leaving a review and giving us some stars. It means the world to me! Take care, and stay fabulous! 

xo,

Alli

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY! 

Shifts are happening. Women in their 40s are coming to therapy not because life is unraveling, but to rediscover who they are. Therapist Niro Feliciano, a Today Show regular, calls this process excavating, pulling back layers of output, caretaking, and self-doubt to find the woman underneath.

In this episode of Smart Girl Summer, Niro and I talk about the real reasons women hesitate to bet on themselves, where those self-limiting beliefs actually start (yes, middle school makes an appearance), and the two questions every woman needs to start asking herself right now.

What You Will Learn in This Episode

Timestamps:

(02:37) - How Niro's work has shifted, why she's back seeing clients full time, and what it taught her about saying no

(05:42) - What Niro is seeing in women right now, the rise of women over 40 in therapy, and the concept of "excavating yourself"

(07:42) - The two questions women don't ask themselves enough: What do you want? What brings you joy?

(10:09) - Alli on writing her motherhood book and the moment women realized they'd been withering on the vine

(11:09) - Why women won't invest in themselves, the fear of failure, and the guilt spiral that follows

(13:11) - What's actually happening in the brain when a woman won't bet on herself

(14:35) - Where self-limiting beliefs come from, childhood, critical parents, and yes, middle school

(16:08) - Alli on what she sees as a business coach and why she sends clients to therapy

(18:31) - How to tell the difference between healthy caution and self-sabotage dressed up as wisdom

(20:17) - Why uncertainty creates more anxiety than the bad thing itself (the electric shock study)

(21:23) - The line between sacrificing yourself for your family and erasing yourself for them

(23:38) - The first step: what are you doing just for yourself this week that nobody else benefits from?

Links to great things we discussed: 

Niro’s Website

Function Health

Uplift App

Wise Woman Era

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉 Don't forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you’re always in the loop. And hey, while you're at it, why not pop over to our YouTube channel and check us out? If you're feeling the love, leave a review and sprinkle some stars because your support truly means the world to me! Take care, and keep shining bright! 

xo,

Alli

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY! 

A voice in your head can sound wise: calm, reasonable, urging, "Don’t overcomplicate this." For most of my life, it helped me go far.

But when making a decision about my future, I realized that voice echoed an earlier version of me. It didn’t know what I know now.

In this episode, I share lessons from a challenging season. My husband was sick. Two of my boys faced unsolved health issues. I was running a company and holding my family together. This episode focuses on how I found clarity in making a difficult business decision and why this lesson is vital for every high-performing woman.

This episode explores identity lag, overthinking, confirmation bias, and why getting out of your head helps you grow. Listen now to discover the mindset shift that transformed my journey.

Timestamps:

(01:28) - Getting stuck when your thoughts aren't helping

(03:16) - Identity lag: why your brain hands you your history when you ask about your future

(04:34) - Why high-performing women keep trying to do this alone

(05:16) - The necklace analogy: why someone outside your life can see the knot

(05:59) - What Alli's weekly coaching session actually looks like

(06:39) - Why the seasons with outside thinking are always the best seasons

(07:58) - Three things to do this week

(09:03) - Why you need to schedule the thing you've been meaning to do for six months

(10:20) - One thing to do this week to interrupt the pattern

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉Don’t forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you never miss a thing. And guess what? We're on YouTube! If you're loving the content, show us some love by leaving a review and giving us some stars. It means the world to me! Take care, and stay fabulous! 

xo,

Alli

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY! 

When I think about Crystal Paine’s story, I always come back to how it really started. She did not launch Money Saving Mom with a polished business plan. She launched it from a basement apartment while she was sick during her first pregnancy, with a laptop and a real need to figure out how to make money online because they were almost broke. Two years later, a simple three day ebook bundle sale brought in three thousand dollars, and she realized she was building something that mattered.

By 2015, her business had grown into a seven figure brand. She was speaking across the country, signing book deals, and juggling media opportunities. And at a coffee date, she told me she could not think of one thing she felt excited about. That is the part of business growth we do not talk about enough.

In this episode, Crystal walks me through her career in eras. The scrappy startup years. The explosive growth phase. The burnout that followed. The year of rest that saved her. And the season she is in now. Crystal and I have been friends for years, and I have been her business coach, so this conversation goes deeper than most interviews ever do.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Timestamps:

(01:58) The early days: law school, infertility, a sick pregnancy, and a laptop

(03:14) How Crystal fell into blogging in 2004 before blogging was a thing

(09:18) Two years in, the $3,000 bundle sale, and the moment momentum became real

(11:15) The 2008 economy, coupon culture, and right‑time‑right‑place growth

(13:45) Simply Sensible: the failed site that taught Crystal the difference between copying someone else's dream and walking into her own

(15:58) Breaking down the eras: startup, growth, burnout, rest, and now

(20:00) Seven figures, speaking everywhere, and feeling completely dead inside

Links to great things we discussed: 

I hope you loved this episode! 🎉Don’t forget to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts and Spotify so you never miss a thing. And guess what? We're on YouTube! If you're loving the content, show us some love by leaving a review and giving us some stars. It means the world to me! Take care, and stay fabulous! 

xo,

Alli