The Aware Parenting Podcast

In this week's episode we talk all about Learning and Growing. We discuss how we might often ask our kids to take risks and try new things; and yet we might be reluctant as adults to step out of our comfort zone. We explore ways to move through our fears and how we can also assist our children in trying new things.

[2.39] Our fears as adults and working with our own trauma

[6:53] Our expectations about children

[10.40] Creating space to listen to fears

[14.00] Modelling to our children around fears and taking risks

[21.00] Overcoming our fears with love and support

[23.15] Choice and love rather than coercion and judgment

[28.00] Our children can be our teachers around taking risks

[30.45] Finding ways to work with willingness

[33.40] Trusting children’s timing and individuality

[37.00] Our own inner child's response to not having a choice when we were younger

[41.00] Celebrating the process of learning

This week’s invitation:

1. Is there something that you always loved to do and you have given it up? Would you like to play with it again?

2. What scares or excites you that you can take a risk on and model to your children?

3. What would you like to hold in mind whenever you notice your child is doing something new?

Resources

Marshall Rosenberg - https://www.cnvc.org/

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk all about partners and ex-partners, and how we navigate parenting when we have different belief systems around parenting. We also explore helping our children if there has been a divorce or separation.

[2.30] Our ideals around parenting

[6:35] Empathy for our partners and how they respond

[9.40] Shifting our paradigm of right and wrong

[12.40] Leaning into our own reactions about our partners or family members

[15.50] Practical ideas around showing a different perspective

[23.35] Our comfort zones in parenting

[27.00] Tools to help navigate separation

[31.45] Resilience in children

[35.50] Trusting children’s healing and timing

[39.25] Holding a vision of what you want it to look like

This week’s invitation:

1. Please give yourself a big hug and acknowledge the work you are doing.

2. See if you can feel compassion for others and knowing that everyone is doing the best job they know-how with the story they have journeyed.

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about feeling exhausted as a parent, and how connected it is with the current paradigm of parenting and our lack of community and support. We explore our belief systems around asking for help, receiving support and how to parent when we don’t seem to have any energy left.

[2.05] It is not a flaw to feel exhausted

[4:15] Our colonised society and its impact on parenting

[7.20] Loss of identity as a woman

[9.45] Support from family and friends and the tribe

[15.40] Our stories around taking a break and receiving support

[21.35] Resentment and not getting our needs met

[24.00] Our needs are our responsibility

[26.15] Our imprints on self-care and boundaries

[29.00] Honouring our yes and no and being authentic

[33.25] Compassion for ourselves and connecting with our values

[35.20] Recognising what we need and giving it to ourselves

[38.10] Creating a dynamic of exchange

[41.00] Compassion for ourselves and our behaviours

[45.40] Keeping it simple as self-care

[52.20] Our ability to receive and staying open to support

[57.00] Checking your willingness

[60.00] Rite of passage into wisdom

This week’s invitation:

1. If you are feeling exhausted, imagine your child as a parent and you as the grandparent; what would you say to support them and encourage them if they were expressing that they were exhausted?

2. What are your stories around exhaustion and asking for support and what does it mean to have self care. What was your imprint?

3. Can you take some time to do something fun for you to lift your energy?

Resources:

Love Being a Mother ebook and meditations: http://www.lovebeingamother.net/ebook/

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about School and Rules and how to support our children, no matter what style of education they experience. We discuss helping them navigate schooling systems based on punishments and rewards and how we can support them to stay connected to who they really are.

[2.10] Decolonisation and our education system

[5:40] Navigating our current school system

[9.00] A new vision for education

[12.05] Supporting our children to not internalise the behaviour of others

[13.30] Getting clear on our deep desire for schooling with our kids

[19.00] Separations and rules in organisations

[22.00] Prioritising children's emotional wellbeing

[26.15] The bigger picture of schooling and socialisation

[30.00] Helping children unpack their day and release feelings

[34.10] Seeing the growth and learning in all choices we make

[36.40] Different styles of learning

[41.10] Slow shifts that are happening in our education system

[45.00] Progressive education and what we need to learn

[47.40] Practical tools to help children process kindergarten and school

[54.30] Supporting ourselves and our children to follow their passions

[57.00] Advocating for our children

This week’s invitation:

1. Do you have a ‘Yes’ for reflecting on your own schooling experiences? What did you really enjoy? What did you not enjoy? How can you listen to those younger parts of you? Does it support you to do anything different with your children?

2. Trusting your child’s journey and trusting yourself and your ability to help them navigate it.

Resources:

www.woodlineprimary.com.au

Alfie Kohn - https://www.alfiekohn.org/books/

The Compassionate Classroom - https://www.amazon.com/Compassionate-Classroom-Relationship-Teaching-Learning/dp/1892005069

Peter Gray - https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/experts/peter-gray-phd

John Taylor Gatto - https://www.amazon.com/Dumbing-Down-Curriculum-Compulsory-Anniversary/dp/0865714487

Marshall Rosenberg - https://www.amazon.com.au/Non-Violent-Communication-Language-Marshall-Rosenberg/dp/1892005034

Marshall Rosenberg - Life-Enriching Education

Marshall Rosenberg - Teaching Children Compassionately

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about Lying and Swearing and the reasons why children may exhibit these behaviours. We look at ways to respond to our children with awareness and compassion and explore our reactions to these behaviours.

[2.11] Cultural conditioning around Lying and Swearing

[5:18] The reasons for Lying or not telling the truth

[7.50] Tweens and Teens and their need for autonomy

[11.20] Checking our responses first around lying

[13.03] Setting a foundation when our kids are young

[19.00] How we respond sets up a dynamic around behaviour

[20.30] Our own stories around lying and how we were responded to

[23.22] How do you feel in response to swearing?

[26.00] The needs that are being met with swearing

[30.20] Games we can use when our child swears

[35.40] The power of words

This week’s invitation:

1. Would you like to play with swearing and see how it feels for you as an adult?

2. Would you like to tune into how you feel around lying, and your experiences as a child and as an adult with this?

Resources:

Lawrence Cohen - https://www.playfulparenting.com/

Aletha Solter - Attachment Play Book

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about Discipline and Consequences and how we can raise our children without resorting to bribes, rewards, and punishments. We explore how connection can create co-operation and offer many respectful ways to respond to and navigate unenjoyable behaviour.

[3.00] Understanding behaviour

[5:25] In balance and out of balance and looking behind the behaviour

[8.26] Understanding where discipline originated from

[11.15] 3 reasons for behaviour: Thinking, Needing, Feeling

[13.03] The mirror within us

[14.35] All behaviour has a reason

[18.25] Changing the paradigm in our culture around behaviour

[21.25] Teenagers, discipline and lying

[23.35] The problems with rewards

[24.50] Natural consequences and artificial consequences

[28.13] How do we all get our needs met?

[31.00] How we can elicit co-operation

[33.15] How do we support teenagers to want to co-operate

[37.45 ] How coercion and powerlessness leads to less willingness

[40.11] What do we do if they are doing something we don’t want them to do?

[44.45] The power of Loving Limits

[48.00] Our fears about what our children may become

[51.10] How connection with ourselves assists our child's behaviour

[54.11] The impact of repressing our true selves

This week’s invitation:

1. Being mindful of the messages we give our children with our responses.

2. Other ways to respond to your children when they are acting out

Resources:

Alfie Kohn - Punished by Rewards. Unconditional Parenting

Aletha Solter - Co-operative and Connected -

Marion's courses - https://www.marionrose.net/which-course-is-for-you/

Lael’s one on one sessions - [email protected]

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about how to navigate disasters and traumas. With the bushfires currently happening in Australia, we discuss managing our emotional states as well as how to assist our children when tragedy and fear are present.

[2.15] Our own personal experiences of living with bushfires

[6:05] The benefits of stress hormones

[10.00] Gratitude for healing

[12.20] Seeing the contrast of what we don’t want

[13.30] Using the balance of attention to express feelings

[19.00] Disassociation and surviving trauma

[23.00] Supporting children to process fear and traumatic events

[26.10] Using play to process feelings and events

[33.45] Unfavourable behaviour is a sign of accumulated feelings

[35.00] Taking care of our nervous system as an adult

[37.40] Repression mechanisms as a way to cope

[40.30] Supporting children to take action

[43.45] Being discerning in what we discuss with children

This week’s invitation:

1.  Connecting with your Inner loving crew to support you through this time.

2. Be curious about your children and if they need extra support and moving into kindness for yourself.

Resources:

Beyond Blue for emotional support - beyondblue.org.au/getsupport

Tears and Tantrums Book - Aletha Solter

Peter Levine and Gina Ross - http://www.ginaross.com/images/emotional_first_aid_brief_guide.pdf?

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

In this week's episode we talk about the upcoming holiday season and the feelings that can arise at this time of the year. We include the pressure we can feel as parents and how we can navigating different beliefs and values in families.

[2.10] Our own personal imprints around Christmas

[4:30] Expectations and disappointments

[6.10] Boundaries and consent at Christmas

[7.50] Good boys and naughty girls - punishments and rewards

[10.30] Keeping magic and fantasy alive

[15.00] What do you want to experience and what do you want your child to experience?

[16.00] Navigating needs not being met - checking in with ourselves

[19.40] Overwhelming feelings for children

[23.00] Setting boundaries and limits for ourselves

[24.00] Old and new traditions

[28.40] Compassion for other family members

[31.50] As a parent, how do we get our needs met at Christmas?

[35.45] Build up of energy at this time of year

[37.20] Brining in gratitude and reflection for the end of the year.

This week’s invitation:

1. Deep compassion for ourselves for this festive season and checking in around what messages are we giving to our children.

2. Tuning into our values at this time of the year.

Resources:

Marion's courses - http://www.marionrose.net/which-course-is-for-you/

Hand in Hand Parenting on navigating holidays - https://www.handinhandparenting.org/

Aha Parenting - https://www.ahaparenting.com/

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

Siblings

In this week's episode we talk about siblings. We look at ways to prepare your older child before bringing a new baby home, and how to navigate fighting and meeting everyone's needs with older children. We also explore our own responses to siblings fighting.

[1.20] Understanding the bigger picture around siblings

[4:00] Preparing for a new baby in the family

[6.50] Preparation beforehand can make the transition easier.

[11.00] Signs of feelings in the older child

[12.20] Games to play to help children process a new sibling

[15.05] Grief around the change of the relationship

[18.00] Age gaps in families

[24.50] Fighting amongst older children

[28.00] Strategies for helping older kids with sibling rivalry

[33.38] Sharing us, sharing attention, sharing toys

[35.00] Setting limits with fighting

[37.10] Looking at our deeper hurts and reactions around fighting

[40.45] Navigating fighting with calm and listening.

[43.45] Apologies and repairing

[45.00] How conflict can create growth

[54.00] Our desire for harmony in our family

[55.33] Enjoy the ways connection can happen

This week’s invitation:

1. Be curious as to what your child is expressing when they are fighting with their sibling.

2. Put yourself in your child's shoes as to what you would like to receive if you are upset or fighting.

Resources:

Aletha Solter's Books - Tears and Tantrums, Co-operative and Connected

Larry Cohen - Playful Parenting

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion

Food and Control

In this week's episode we talk about food and control and how children can use food as a way to repress feelings as well as gain some control in their lives.

[1.30] Why food issues can be about control

[2:45] Why feelings around food can be confusing

[5.30] Food as love

[8.05] Trusting our bodies and what we want to eat

[11.00] Confusing hunger and feelings

[13.45] Compassion for our stories around food

[19.00] Bringing awareness to food

[21.35] Powerlessness in life and gaining control

[23.00] Overeating, boundaries and survival

[25.50] Listening to the quality of asking for food

[29.35] Attachment Play with Food

[33.40] How our digestive system is related to feelings and emotions

[37.50] Trust and food and giving power to our children

[40.51] Being present in our bodies

[45.45] Enjoying food and family

[49.00] Compassion for ourselves with our relationship with food.

[53.30] Eating with pleasure and love

This week’s invitation:

1.  Be curious as to your relationship with food

2. Bringing joy, laughter, and love to eating and family time

Resources:

Marion's courses - http://www.marionrose.net/which-course-is-for-you/

Aletha Solter's Books - Tears and Tantrums, The Aware Baby, Co-operative and Connected

 

As always, you can head over to the Aware Parenting Podcast Facebook group and join in the discussion, or you’ll find us on Instagram @theawareparentingpodcast 

You can find Marion at marionrose.net and Lael at laelstone.com.au

And if you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the podcast so we can pop into your podcast feed.

Sending you much love, compassion and grace in your parenting journey.

x

Lael and Marion